Knight's Contract

Knights Contract

Rating: M

Score: 4.5/10

                Once upon a time, there was a game called God of War. It was repetitive and frankly it wasn't perfect, and it handled itself like it was: silly. It was addictive, silly, and loved. Just like all good things, it needs to have followers in its footsteps, trying to cash in on the same type of gameplay. Well, here's another one. Can it possibly out-perform the master? Of course not, even miracles couldn't give it that, but how bad could it be? This game is available for the Xbox 360 and Playstation 3.

                You are Heinrich, typical super-god who dresses like he's trying too hard to become an icon. Wanting to be vulnerable again, he agrees to a contract binding him to the wishes of Gretchen the witch. Gretchen wants to stop her evil sisters, who are also witches, from punishing mankind for being so cruel. Oh the irony. It goes off on tangents where Heinrich worked for the man who's re-incarnated the witches and evil stuff goes down, but frankly you're not going to get drawn in enough to care.

                The main draw to the game is, of course, it's combat. It's a typical hack-and-slash button-mashing fest with very few enemy varieties. Do I need to elaborate? You have light attack, heavy attack, and grab, and don't worry about comboing, the game designers certainly didn't. We have the intense light attack-light attack-light attack, the prestigious heavy attack-heavy attack-heavy attack, or if you're really talented: light attack-heavy attack-light attack. Holy smokes, that's convoluted. Not that's you'll need anything but the light attack to mash.

                Your scythe isn't the only attack you have! Gretchen, being a witch, has magic as well. You have multiple different magic spells that do essentially the same thing: target an enemy and shoot something at them. It's usually not an insta-kill, but it can be used to stun an enemy, leading to many large enemies being cake because they're not immune to stun-hit-lather-repeat type of gameplay.

                Just when you think you had enough of the game, it's time for a boss battle. Be prepared to put aside some time, because the bosses can get needlessly long despite being quite easy. I mean, how hard can it be since you're an invincible meat shield to a witch, right?

                So how does invincibility work, anyway? When you get hit enough, you fall (often with body parts unattached, so perhaps "invincible" is a poor choice of wording). Button mash, and you'll be revived. If Gretchen dies, it's game over. Put two and two together here: You die, and it takes about 5-10 seconds to get revived. Gretchen, who for a witch isn't a great fighter, dies and it's game over. If something is strong enough to take you down, it'll just destroy Gretchen. Thus, frustration ensues.

                For what it's worth, it's fun enough. The combat isn't flawed, but everything else seems to be. Its combo system (or lack of), its camera, and its story are all lackluster, but nothing can touch the fact its an...average beat-'em-up game. Time limits are annoying and needless in a beat-'em-up game, and few gamers love quick-time events since its demand on reflexes breaks flow. Quick-time events, for those who don't know, are events in which you must quickly press a button when it appears on screen in a cutscene or fail the cutscene. Imagine you're relaxing, watching a cutscene, and a button flashes on the screen. By the time the impulse reaches your brain to do anything, it's too late. Time to restart, hooray.

                At the end of the day, is it really that bad? Well, its existence revolves around the fact it tries to be another game, and tries so hard it's embarrassing. It's full of flaws, and only has decent combat to hold up a $70 title. It's only redeeming quality is the box makes a superb paperweight.