調入氣中

我跟隨阿姜放之初，曾經問過的一個問題是：“爲了禪定，需要信什麼?”他回答，信一件事：業的原則。不過我們聽見“業”這個詞，常常想到的是“業與輪回”，他所特指的卻是「行動的原則」，即：行爲塑造體驗。

如果你確信這一點，就可以作禪定，因爲畢竟，禪定是一種作爲。你並非僅是坐在這裏守候時光，等待覺醒的偶發突現。即使在極其寂止的禪定境界之中，仍然有一種動作進行著。即使“成爲覺知”的動作，仍然是一種作。它是一種造作，一種行[sankhara]。在一篇經文當中，佛陀說， 構成整個體驗的所有蘊，所有聚集體[khandhas]，必須被造作的過程塑造成諸蘊。換句話說，有一種色的潛在可能性，一種受的潛在可能性，有想、行、識的潛在可能性。正是造作的動作，把這些潛在可能性轉爲實際的諸蘊。

聽起來抽象，但它對禪定來說，甚至從一開始，就是極其重要的一課。你在這裏， 坐於身內——當然，那裏就有一個造作：你坐在身內的這個想法——不過，既然有許多東西你現在可以專注，那就有選擇的可能性。這個選擇的可能性，正是業力因果發生作用的地方。你可以選擇來到你覺知範圍內的任何覺受。就彷彿體內所有不同的部位，都在滋滋作聲。這裏有苦的潛勢，那裏有樂的潛勢。所有這些不同的覺受都在你面前，讓你對它們做點什麼，你將會注意其中的那些，是有選擇的。

醫生們做過一些研究顯示，痛不僅僅是一種身體現象，它不完全是先決的。當下來到你的大腦中的訊息，如此之多，你不可能全部處理，因此，你選擇只專注其中的一部分。心有專注痛感的傾向，是因爲通常它是一種預警訊號。不過，我們並不是非得專注那裏。換句話說，可能在身體的某處略微有點不舒適，你可以盯著它，使不舒適感越來越激烈，越來越成問題。那是你當下可以做的一件事，然而——即使你或者沒有意識到——做與不做，你是有選擇的。你可以選擇不令它更激烈，你甚至可以選擇徹底漠視它。很多時候，我們對覺受有一些習慣性的反應，它們如此習慣化，如此常規化，我們以爲不存在選擇。“事情只能這樣”我們這麼想，然而，它們並非如此。

那就是業的原則的另一個寓意：你可以改變你的行爲。如果體驗的某些部分隨選擇和造作而定，你可以選擇改變。這一點，在你專注呼吸時，可以看得很清楚。氣在體內始終存在，如果你仔細觀察，就會發現，它有許多層次。就好比觀測氣象：有時侯，你察覺一陣輕風從南方吹來，然而抬頭觀天，看見一個雲層在朝東移動，另一個更高的雲層在朝西移動。大氣層中存在許多層次不同的風，同樣地，身體內部存在許多層次不同的氣。你專注其中的哪些，是可以選擇的。

這就像是無線電接收器。你可以選擇調收不同的電臺。來自附近所有電臺的電波，所有不同的頻率，都存在於我們周圍。有來自洛杉磯的電波、來自聖地亞哥的電波、甚至有不知哪裏來的短波，到處都是。它們現在正在穿過這間屋子；它們現在正在穿過你的身體。當你打開收音機時，你選擇想專注的頻率，想聆聽的頻率。身體也同樣。你在所有可能的覺受中分撿，單單挑出一類覺受——氣的氣性——專注於它。你在哪裏最清晰地感受到出入息，就把注意力定在那裏。我們有些人有一臺保養不佳的收音機，一調到某個頻率，它就滑到別的頻率上。因此，你必須不停地把它往回調、往回調。

不過，問題還不單單是調頻。還有一旦調進去了，對那個覺受做什麼的問題。再一次，你專注呼吸的方式，可以令它痛苦，也可以是令它舒適的。你面臨的並非僅僅是前定不變的氣。你對它做什麼，可以使它多痛或少痛、多樂或少樂。延續先前的比喻，就好像收音機上有個音量調鈕： 你可以把它調得巨響，以至於耳痛，或者，你可以把它調得極弱，以至於幾乎聽不見。不過，隨著你對音量的調節熟練起來，就會懂得什麼是恰到好處，這樣就可以調整你專注的層次和力度，獲得最大的享受。

隨著你的調入越來越準，你還會發現其它的細節。再一次，以收音機作比方，當你極其準確地調到那個頻率上時，雜音消失了，你就可以聽見訊號中過去聽不見的微妙之處。你可以操縱它們，把高音成分調響，把低音成分調響，隨心所欲。因此，儘管那個無線電訊號是先決的，你對它可以有很多作爲。那就是你當下禪定當中業的因素： 就是你對那個氣做什麼。

你可以學會以更善巧的方式應對氣，使得你可以不僅感覺到極其明顯的出入肺部的空氣，而且感覺到隨著你入息，出息而穿過整個身體的諸種覺受，感覺到體內真正把空氣帶入肺中、又讓它呼出的那些動態分佈。每一次你呼吸，都有一陣波動貫穿身體。隨著你對它敏感起來，你開始感覺到，身內哪裏有張力，哪裏沒有；哪裏精細的氣流動正常，哪裏不正常。

再一次，它不是先決的。對那股氣流，你可以有所作爲。你可以改善它。如果你注意到體內某個部位存在張力，就放鬆它; 這樣做，往往不僅改善了那一個部位的氣流，而且也改善了其它部位的氣流。你開始把身體理解成一大堆不同的、相互連接的能量分佈系列。這裏的某個緊繃，可能會導致那裏的緊繃，這一切都被繫結起來，成爲一股總體的緊壓感，成爲擠抑身體的一條條緊勒感。或者，你也可以把它們鬆開。那是你的選擇。你可以放鬆這裏的一點張力，發現它導致了那裏張力的解開。或者，你可能發現，一切變得如此鬆弛，你游移而去。這說明，你必須學會一種“恰到好處感”，使得你可以長住那種覺受，維持你的專注，即使那個無線電訊號開始稍有移動，你可以準確地跟著它，不懈地隨著它。

這個時候，你可以放開出入呼吸之感——也就是粗糙的氣感、明顯的氣感——把注意力更多地放在體內精細的氣流上.隨著你對體內所有那些感受到張力、阻礙、或外擠的部位加以徹底耕作，你讓氣感充滿所有那些細小的角落，一股越來越大的充沛感、清新感就會出現。那就是喜的意思。它是良好覺受的飲入。我們一般把 piti 翻譯成 rapture——喜，然而與它相關的還有另一個詞，pivati——啜飲。你飲入這股良好的感覺。整個身體感到充沛，感到清新，因爲你已經開啟了體內所有的細孔，讓氣入內。當你得到那種充沛感時，放鬆就比較容易了。

下面這個比喻，形象也許不甚美觀，不過這時候的心，就像一隻終於找到你體內一根大靜脈的蚊子。它把小小的長吻伸了進去，就在那裏呆著不動，沐浴在極樂之中。它的翅膀失去力量，它的細足失去力量，不管你怎樣推它，它就是不想走。它就在飲入它想要的東西。心也同樣：一旦那股清新的氣感開始充滿身體，你就把一切放開了。無論來了其它什麼干擾，你毫無興趣，因爲你已經得到某種令你極其滿足的東西。幾乎可以說，它是一種可以爲之而死的覺受。你放下自己的防護，放開其它一切，因爲這種覺受具有如此徹底的吸攝感。你已經開放了身體的每一個部分，你的覺知的每一個部分，讓這股覺受入內。

隨著你待在那裏，心越來越寂止，你開始覺察到一種更深的、沒有來回流動的絕對充沛之感——體內的一種真正的寂止。在身體的表面，在你的覺知的表面，有一股微微的換氣感，但內部深處，是巨大的寂止。飲入感不復存在，因爲你已經絕對充滿。阿姜李用冰塊的形象作比喻：一股水汽從冰塊上冒出——也就是，在你的覺知邊緣附近，有一種極其霧狀的動態——然而其它的一切堅固、寂止。

接下來，到最後，連水汽也停止了，那股固性充滿了你的整個覺知。伴隨著的，是一股明亮感，儘管你也許不覺得這種明亮像一盞燈。它是一種奇特的素質：明亮、清晰、充滿全身的一種身體感，一種覺受基調，你只是坐在那裏，在它的中間。

沒有必要匆忙地穿過這些階段，沒有必要大費周章地趕超。實際上，最好是不試圖快趕。你就找一種可以調入的覺受。待在那裏不動，正因爲你的專注[定]的持恒，它自己會發展。當你最後達到那股固性寂止之感時，你開始意識到，你可以選擇給它一種形狀，或者不給。你可以專注那些給你一個體形的那些覺受，你也可以選擇忽略它們。這就是你真正看見業的原則在禪定中起作用的地方。幾乎就好像種種體感[色]已經轉變成了一團霧。這些小小的氣粒在那裏閃爍，你感受到粒子之間的空間。整個身體被這個空間所充滿，後者還朝各個方向，延伸到體外。一反專注這些微粒，你可以專注[定在]空間上。這對於你如何體驗當下擁有多少程度的選擇，給你上了極其清晰的一課。你在這裏有一個身體的簡單覺受，來自你已經作出的賦予形狀的諸種選擇。你意識到，你可以專注許多不同的覺受，如何選擇你的覺受，如何放大你想要的覺受，如何把不想要的覺受放在一邊，存在著一種技能。

因此，即使只是定的訓練， 這其中仍然包含著許多的明辨。如佛陀曾經所說，止與觀兩者對證得良好、有力的諸種定境都是必要的。他在講到洞見時，從來沒有脫離過因果的角度，脫離你所行之事的善巧角度。

因此，這場修練是在構造基礎，使得——當思考無常、苦、非我等問題的時機到來時——你已經有了合適的背景。你已經造築了一個內在的良好空間，一個當下的良好空間，使得你沒有需要抓取這、抓取那的饑餓感。你已經飽飲了充沛和寂止，這時你的心態好多了，可以對事物如實作觀——以至於當洞見來臨時，它不會令你動搖。沒有這個堅固的基礎，無常、苦、非我的觀想有可能令你極度迷失。不過，當你在禪定中正在做什麼的背景之下，開始思考這些問題時，它們就使定更加穩固。定、止、洞見、明辨，正是在這裏，以一種健康、平衡的方式，全部融合在一起。

(根據2002年12月某日開示錄音整理，本文來自坦尼沙羅尊者開示集《禪定》)

When I first went to stay with Ajaan Fuang, one of the questions I asked him was, “What do you need to believe in order to meditate?” He answered that there was only one thing: the principle of kamma. Now when we hear the word “kamma,” we usually think, “kamma-and-rebirth,” but he meant specifically the principle of action: that what you do shapes your experience.

If you’re convinced of this, you can do the meditation because, after all, the meditation is a doing. You’re not just sitting here, biding your time, waiting for the accident of Awakening to happen. Even in very still states of meditation, there’s an activity going on. Even the act of “being the knowing” is still a doing. It’s a fabrication, a sankhara. In one of the suttas, the Buddha says that all the different khandhas, all the different aggregates that make up experience as a whole, have to get shaped into aggregates by the process of fabrication. In other words, there’s a potential for a form, a potential for a feeling, potential for perception, fabrication, consciousness; and the act of fabricating is what turns these potentials into actual aggregates.

It sounds abstract, but it’s a very important lesson for the meditation even from the very beginning. You sit here in the body—and of course, that’s a fabrication right there: the idea that you’re sitting in the body—but given all the many different things you could focus on right now, there’s the possibility of choice. This possibility of choice is where kamma comes in. You can choose any of the sensations that are coming into your awareness. It’s as if there were a buzz in all the different parts of the body. There’s a potential for pain here, a potential for pleasure over there. All these different sensations are presenting themselves to you for you to do something about them, and you have the choice as to which ones you’ll notice.

Doctors have done studies showing that pain isn’t just a physical phenomenon. It isn’t totally a given. There are so many different messages coming into your brain right now that you can’t possibly process them all, so you choose to focus on just some of them. And the mind has a tendency to focus on pain because it’s usually a warning signal. But we don’t have to focus there. In other words, there can be a slight discomfort in a part of the body, and you can focus on it and make it more and more intense, more and more of an issue. That’s one thing you can do right now, but—even if you may not realize it—you have the choice of whether or not to do that. You can choose not to make it more intense. You can choose even to ignore it entirely. Many times we have habitual ways of relating to sensations, and they’re so habitual and so consistent that we think there’s no choice at all. “This is the way things have to be,” we think, but they don’t.

That’s the other implication of the principle of kamma: You can change your actions. If some parts of experience are dependent on choice and fabrication, you can choose to change. You see this really clearly when you focus on the breath. The breath is always there in the body, and if you look carefully you’ll discover that it has many levels. It’s like looking up in the sky: Sometimes you feel a breeze coming from the south, but you look up in the sky and see a layer of clouds moving east, and another higher layer of clouds moving west. There are lots of different layers of wind in the atmosphere and, in the same way, there are lots of different layers of breath in the body. You can choose which ones to focus on.

It’s like having a radio receiver: You can choose to tune-in to different stations. The radio waves from all the nearby radio stations, all the different frequencies, are all in the air around us. There are radio waves from Los Angeles, radio waves from San Diego, even short wave radio waves from who-knows-where, all over the place. They’re going through this room right now. They’re going through your body right now. And when you turn on the radio you choose which frequency you want to focus on, which one you want to listen to. The same with the body. You sort out, of all the possible sensations, just one type of sensation to focus on: the breath-ness of the breath. Wherever you feel the sensation of the in-and-out breath most clearly, you focus right there. Now some of us have a radio we haven’t taken very good care of, and as soon as we tune it in to one station it slips over to another. So you’ve got to keep tuning it back, tuning it back.

But the problem isn’t just the tuning. It’s what you do with the sensation once you’ve tuned-in to it. Again, you can focus on the breath in a way that makes it painful, or you can focus on it in a way that makes it comfortable. You’re not faced just with the given-ness of the breath. What you do with it can make it more or less painful, more or less comfortable. To continue the analogy, it’s like having a volume control on the radio: You can turn it way up loud so that it hurts your ears, or you can turn it way down soft so that you can hardly hear it at all. But as you get more skillful with your volume control, you get a sense of what’s just right so that you can adjust the level and the pressure of your focus for maximum enjoyment.

As you get tuned-in more and more precisely, you discover there are other subtleties as well. Again, like the radio, when you really get tuned very precisely onto the frequency, the static goes away and you can hear subtleties in the signal that you couldn’t hear before. You can play with them, turn up the treble, turn up the base, whatever you want. So even though the radio signal is a given, you can do a lot with it. That’s the element of kamma in your meditation right now: It’s what you’re doing with the breath.

You can learn how to be more skillful in how you relate to it so that you can sense not only the very obvious breath of the air coming in and out of the lungs， but also the sensations that go through the whole body as you breathe in, as you breathe out, the patterns of movement in the body that actually bring the air into the lungs and let it go out. There’s a wave going through the body each time you breathe. As you become sensitive to it, you begin to sense where there’s tension in the body, and where there’s not; where the subtle breath flows properly, and where it doesn’t.

And, again, it’s not just a given. You can do things with that flow. You can improve the flow. If you notice tension in a certain part of the body, you relax it; and oftentimes doing this improves the breath flow not only at that one spot but also in other parts of the body as well. You begin to have a sense of the body as a whole series of different interconnected energy patterns. A tightening up here may lead to a tightening up over there, and it all gets connected in a feeling of overall constriction, of bands of tension squeezing the body. Or you can loosen it up. That’s your choice. You can relax this bit of tension here and find that it leads to an unraveling of tension over there. Or you might find that everything gets so loose that you drift off. This means that you’ve got to learn how to gain a sense of “just right” so that you can stay with the sensation, keep your focus, and even if the radio signal begins to drift a little bit, you can follow it precisely and stay right with it.

At this point you can let go of the sensation of the in-and-out breath—the coarse breath, the obvious breath—and focus more on the subtle breath flow in the body. As you work through all the different parts of the body where it feels tense or blocked or sort of squeezed out, you let the breath sensations fill all those little nooks and crannies, and there comes a greater and greater sense of fullness, refreshment. That’s what piti means. It’s the drinking-in of the good sensation. We normally translate piti as rapture, but it’s also related to the word for drinking, pivati. You drink-in this nice sensation. It feels full, it feels refreshing all the way through the body because you’ve opened up all the little cells in the body and allowed the breth to enter. When you get that sense of fullness, it’s easier to relax.

This may not be a pretty image, but the mind at this point is like a mosquito when it’s finally hit a big vein in your body. It sticks its little proboscis in and just stays right there, bathed in bliss. Its wings go weak, its feet go weak, and no matter how much you try to brush it away, it just doesn’t want to go. It’s just drinking-in what it wants. The same with the mind: As soon as that refreshing breath sensation begins to fill the body, you let go of everything else. No matter what other disturbances come, you’re not the least bit interested because you’ve got something really satisfying. You could almost say that it’s a sensation to die for. You let down your guard, let go of everything else, because this sensation is so totally absorbing. You’ve opened up every part of the body, every part of your awareness for this sensation to come in.

As you stay there and the mind grows more and more still, you become aware of a deeper sensation of absolute fullness with no sense of flowing back and forth—a real stillness in the body. There’s a slight sense of air exchange on the very surface of the body, the surface of your awareness, but deep down inside there’s a great stillness. There’s no longer the sense of drinking-in because you’re absolutely full. Ajaan Lee uses the image of an ice cube: A vapor is coming off the cube—a very vaporous movement around the edge of your awareness—but everything else is solid and still.

And then finally even that vapor stops, and the solidity fills your whole awareness. It’s accompanied by a sense of brightness, even though you may not sense this brightness as a light. It’s a peculiar quality: a physical sensation, a feeling tone, of brightness, clarity, filling the whole body, and you’re just sitting there in the middle of it.

There’s no need to rush through these stages, no need to go jumping through hoops. In fact, it’s best if you not try to rush. Just find one sensation you can tune-in to. Stay right there and it will develop on its own, simply because of the consistency of your focus. When you finally reach that sense of solid stillness and stay there, you begin to realize that you can choose to give a shape to it or not. You can focus on the sensations that give you a sense of the shape of the body or you can choose to ignore them. This is where you really see the principle of kamma coming into play in the meditation. It’s almost as if the various sensations of the body have turned into a mist. There are these little breath droplets just shimmering there, and you sense the space in between them. The whole body is filled with this space, which also extends outside the body in every direction. Instead of focusing on the little droplets, you can focus on the space. This gives you a really clear lesson in how much choice you have in how you experience the present moment. Just the simple sensation of having a body here comes from subconscious shape-giving choices you’ve made. You realize there are lots of different sensations you can focus on, and there’s a skill in how you choose your sensations, in how you magnify the ones you want, and how you just put aside the ones you don’t.

So even though this is just training in concentration, there’s also a lot of discernment involved. As the Buddha once said, both tranquility and insight are required for getting good strong states of absorption. And he never talked about insight without framing it in terms of kamma, in terms of the skillfulness of what you’re doing.

So this practice is what lays the groundwork so that—when the time comes to consider issues of inconstancy, stress, and not-self—you’ve got the proper context. You’ve created a good space inside, a good space in the present moment, so that there’s no hungry sense of having to grasp after this or grasp after that. When you’ve drunk your fill of the fullness and stillness, you’re in a much better mood to consider things for what they actually are—so that when insight comes it’s not destabilizing. Without this solid foundation, thinking about inconstancy, stress, or not-self can get really disorienting. But when you start thinking about these issues in the context of what you’re doing in the meditation, they make it even more stabilizing. This is where concentration, tranquility, insight, and discernment all come together in a healthy and balanced way.