Suggested Captions 09

1. I understand the crowd gave you a big hand.

1. "Should the king become aroused, you must put this on immediately."

1. Caroline learns Velasco Cat finished last.

1. Edward gets the news that Velasco Cat finished last.

1. "Seriously? You really want the inscription to read 'For Mr. Major Asshole'?"

1. In a modern version of the Puritan's "stocks", Wanda Boondatch must spend

two days on the villlage green locked in the "splits". She was

convicted of downloading porn while driving.

1. Angered by President Obama's increasing use of profanity -- and his regular references to

illegal aliens as "Mexican anal leakage" -- protestors demonstrate outside the White House.

1. "Press 3 for questions regarding model 2314A; press 4 for wireless 388s still under warrantee;"

2. While on hold, Phillip forgets why he called.

1. "Where the hell are the chairs??"

2. "Excuse me Lord, but some of us were wondering when you're going to turn the water into wine?"

3. "Bring me my cross!!"

1. "You see, in our culture blow jobs are not considered sex."

2. "Then we add chopped cilantro and jalapenos and call it "guacamole".

The Metropolitan Opera Company Revisits South Pacific