Suggested Captions 11

1. Protesting the military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, Paris Hilton

made the rounds of California bases. "There's no reason why

sex shouldn't be part of baracks life", she exclaimed.

1. "Let me get this straight . . . you want to put your head between my legs and see how

long you can hold your breath?"

2. Marla realizes something is going on between Penny and Nancy.

1. Accused of having had sex with most of her students, 8th-grade teacher

Alejandra Ruiz's tattoo added to the buzz at her indictment.

1. Satan's inner-circle entourage consists primarily of female folk singers.

1. One of the few non-Hopi men who has mastered "snake blowing", Homer Jethro pipes out a

moving version of Amazing Grace.

1. Tri Delta's annual rush selection process gets down to brass tacks.

1. Sadly, when all was said and done, Cassie was still possessed.

1. Sondra tokes some killer smoke from her priceless Egyptian 4th Dynasty bong.

1. Brown University sophomore Cynthia Ann Johnson flashes her sorority sisters the sign for "totally horny".

"Us too!!" Sally Miller flashes back.

1. One Horsepower Engine: Nellie Belle pushes a barge out of its "garage" in an Amsterdam

residential "no power-engines" area.