I woke up and applied my clown makeup with a careful hand. “Society is going to hate this so much,” I said with a comical grin before putting on my 3-piece purple suit that doesn’t fit right. After double-checking my blue eye-liner in the mirror, I walked out the door, passing my poorly developed love-interest in the process. The hallway was dimly lit, just the way I like it. I walked to the kitchen to grab some toast, which was burnt to the point where it wasn’t inedible, but just plain annoying to have as breakfast to start my day. On my way out the door, I ran into a neighbor of mine who knew absolutely nothing about me or Batman so could not add to the story. I grabbed my phone out of my pocket to check instagram and was appalled by the number of imposters who were trying to steal my look and call it a “costume.” Unfortunately for them, my outfit was far superior than any of them, and now it would see the light of day and all the world would look in horror.
Then I murdered a child with a crowbar.