Maybe I actually have incredible talent hiding in me
…That can't be true,right?
No matter how much I try to get better I always end up falling behind
Often asking myself ”did I understand?”
Tired of who I already am
But I can't seem to change
Looking at my reflection I ask myself
“Who am I?”
“Who will I be?”
But I get no response
Tired of being ordinary
Desperately wishing to be someone new
A caterpillar turned into a butterfly
Finally out of its chrysalis
Is it too late to change?
Years of running in circles
Trying to find myself
I stand in front of the ones I love yet
meaning full words struggle to come out of my mouth
So I say nothing
My poem was about doubts I’ve had and how years of trying to become someone better. It didn't work for me no matter how much I wanted it to. Growing up, teachers and family members told me how one day I would become a great and successful person. Over the years I have proved them wrong. The guilt of that has caused doubt in the person I am and questions of who I really am.
"God, this one hit home pretty hard for me. As a "former gifted kid" myself, I know the pressure that family and teachers and other role models put on their children is intense. It messes you up, almost irreparably. It's difficult and really scary, but as someone who also is trans/nonbinary, I've learned that you need to let change and self discovery come naturally. You can push a little, but push too much and you'll tip it over, impeding your progress to self betterment and personal growth. Just a little at a time. As for the writing, there's a very interesting urgency to it that makes it feel very distressed, which makes sense for the theme of the poem, and I like it a lot! Great work on this!"
--Bailey Girtman
"I can relate to your poem. As someone who also feels wary about disappointing others, I try my absolute best in everything that I do, but it doesn´t measure up to everyone else ´ s expectations. You did very well showing your side and your challenges, I can feel the emotions that you have also felt. I enjoyed reading your poem and I hope you know that finding yourself isn´t always easy, but take your time, every journey is different and unique!"
--Lynne Vu
"This is a very well written poem the emotion is so relatable and I know for a fact that most of us have felt this pressure and the way you described it was so real."
--Ximena Malpica