Relationship Advice

*Disclaimer* This is completely satirical and should not be taken seriously. This is meant to cause people to reflect on their current behaviors and hopefully make changes for the good. - Cate

First off, don’t have them. 

But, in the EMERGENCY case you do, most will suggest the solution is communication. But I say, why communicate with someone when you can just ignore them? The argument has to end at some point. 

Psychologists would say that during arguments, you should listen, use respect, and share your feelings. I think they are wrong and let me argue why. 

1. Start With Respect

People who start arguments with you don't deserve your respect. If you start an argument with someone, well, you are stupid. They already respect their own opinion too much and shouldn't gain your respect. 

2. Come With an Open Mind

Why lie that you have an open mind? Because, between you and me, everyone knows you don’t. Isn’t that how you got into the argument in the first place?

3. Recognize Underlying Pain Points

These underlying pain points shouldn’t affect your opinion. You still feel the way you feel and let them know. No need to be empathetic!  

4. Share Your Feelings

If you are in this argument, then the person must already know your feelings. Why keep repeating yourself? You just become even more annoyed. 

5. Practice Active Listening

You already know their reasoning, so why listen? You already know you don’t agree. Don’t waste the limited energy you have. 

All these points must have proven to you that arguments are stupid and you should follow my advice for I am ultimately superior and wise. You're welcome for the advice. Now go out and get in some arguments. Actually, don't do that. I take it back.