EPISODE 37

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PERCIVAL : 

( The crossing wasn’t very restful. 

Sir Tristan was depressed for a good chunk of the trip…

…and spent the rest of it arguing with Palamedes.

I wanted to spend some time with him, ask him questions about the situation in Tintagel, but… )

TRISTAN : 

Not now, Percival.

PERCIVAL : 

You’ve been saying that for days.

TRISTAN : 

If you don’t like it, you can stay in Camelot next time.

PERCIVAL : 

( Why is it so infuriating? 

The urgent missive told us to make our way to a castle that belonged to a certain Hoel of Brittany, in Benwick.

But when we got there… )

SERVANT : 

Sirs, I’ve come to guide you to King Hoel’s home.

TRISTAN : 

Is this not it?

SERVANT : 

You’re at his castle, but he doesn’t live there. Follow me.

PERCIVAL : 

( We went deeper into the woods.

Sir Tristan kept his hand on his sword the whole time. )

SERVANT : 

Here we are, sirs.

Please follow me inside.

PALAMEDES : 

Do you think it’s an ambush?

TRISTAN : 

[ climbs off his horse ]

Could be.

Let’s keep our guard up.

[ they follow the servant, who leads them to an open door. ]

GAWAIN : 

Say, Kay, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were cheating.

KAY : 

Me? Never.

DINADAN : 

Don't you wanna hear your favorite song?

LAMORAK : 

How about you stop fucking with me, huh? 

ARTHUR : 

Besides, with Morgan there, things should be alri⎯

Ah, there’s the Cornwall company.

I see you managed to get ahold of Palamedes on the way here, that’s no small feat.

Go on, take a seat!

How was the esteemed Mark of Cornwall?

TRISTAN : 

He’s very pleased you agreed to his request, my lord.

He looks forward to seeing you.

ARTHUR : 

Well, I don’t! (I did you a favor.)

TRISTAN : 

But, what are we all doing here?

ARTHUR : 

You’ll need to ask Hoel when he joins us.

TRISTAN : 

Din! I didn’t think I’d see you again so soon!

[ din jumps up ]

TRISTAN : 

You look wel⎯

DINADAN : 

Pal! It’s been so long! 

PALAMEDES : 

Aww, I’m glad to see you too, Din! 

[ tristan is shoook ]

LAMORAK : 

Percy! [ hug ]

TRISTAN : 

I see how it is…

DINADAN : 

Oh, please, drop the jealous act! I see you a lot more of you than Palamedes.

TRISTAN : 

It’s not a bad thing, if you want my opinion.

DINADAN : 

Stop it, jelly.

ARTHUR : 

Tristan, Dinadan.

Drop the courtship, you two. Why don't you come play me a song instead?

DINADAN : 

Oh, my lord, I’ll come over and court you right now, if you’re so jealous.

But you must know my heart belongs to Kay.

KAY : 

Ah?

DINADAN : 

[ wiggling and ;3ing ]

Only for as long as your meals last, I fear. 

BEDIVERE : 

( shine, shine )

Oh, he doesn’t have much more going for him, you know.

KAY : 

Hey now, you snake⎯

DINADAN : 

Wait, I’ve got more to win by courting Bedivere, actually!

BEDIVERE : 

Who said I wanted you, lad?

PERCIVAL : 

( This atmosphere is oddly relaxing.

Not too many people, just old friends teasing one another. )

ARTHUR : 

Anyway, any courtly act is dedicated to the king by default.

KAY : 

Hey, you already stole my stuff when we were kids, don't you dare steal my husband too. 

PERCIVAL  : 

( Maybe one day, I’ll be one of them. )

DINADAN : 

Looks like you’re looking for something, Percy.

PERCIVAL : 

Are Aglovale and Mordred… not here?

DINADAN : 

They stayed behind in Camelot.

Don’t worry, my brother’s keeping them company.

I didn’t expect you and Mordred to become so close.

PERCIVAL : 

Huh?

DINADAN : 

Oh, he just told me…things…

…that show he cares about you a great deal.

[ percy is flustered and confused!! ]

BORS : 

By the way, how is your brother, Dinadan?

He looked furious when he left.

DINADAN : 

…He’s fine.

Well, it’s complicated.

I’d rather not discuss it with you.

BORS : 

Oh, of course. 

I hope everything will work out soon, then.

[ din is embarrassed ]

HOEL : 

Thank you all for coming.

You must have had a long journey, but I hope you’re all ready for a fight,

as I believe a battle is unavoidable

in the situation I find myself in.

I’m sorry I cannot host you in my own castle,

but living there has become too dangerous.

ARTHUR : 

Hoel.

Explain yourself, please.

HOEL : 

( intimidated )

Yes, well, I…

A few years ago, some rumors started spreading across my domain.

A giant supposedly made his home in Mount Tombe

and devoured its inhabitants.

At first, I thought it was only peasant’s gossip, the usual fretting and thinking the end is nigh every time an issue arises.

But the rumors lingered, peasants began to go missing…

and the knights who volunteered to investigate the situation never came back.

Then, a few weeks ago, I finally saw him

for he came into my own home and abducted my daughter, Elaine.

He told me…

“Go fetch Arthur Pendragon, King of Britain

and bring him to Mount Tombe,

or you’ll never see your daughter again.”

The Lady of the Lake counseled me to heed it and send word to you.

BORS : 

The Lady of the Lake?! Is she there?

HOEL : 

I don’t know, she told me she was working to help…

ARTHUR : 

…I see.

Hoel, I swore to eradicate the giants from any kingdom under my protection.

I’ll honor my oath, and do everything in my power to bring your daughter back.

Knights, prepare for battle. 

This giant is no doubt waiting for us. 

Who knows what his plans are. 

KAY : 

Quiet in here, we can’t even hear ourselves talk!

?? : 

Wait, your armor’s falling apart⎯

KAY : 

I said quiet! ( This isn't some damn hiking trip! )

BEDIVERE : 

What should we do with the squires?

ARTHUR : 

They’ll stay near the entrance, close to the carriage.

The two of you tagging along wasn't in my plans.

It’s much too dangerous for you.

PERCIVAL : 

Sir, I want to fight by your side.

ARTHUR : 

What you want matters little to me, young Welshman.

I have no wish to bring your corpse back to Camelot.

LAMORAK : 

A giant’s usually some four meters tall, and has immeasurable strength. Trust me, you’re better off watching from the sidelines while we take care of it. 

PALAMEDES : 

Don’t take this fight so lightly, Lamorak.

I don’t want to bring your corpse back to Camelot either.

LAMORAK : 

…At this point,

it might be your only opportunity to talk to Aglovale.

PALAMEDES : 

…Don’t be morbid.

PERCIVAL : 

( It sure is cold in here. )

TRISTAN : 

Here we are.

There's Mount Tombe.

BEDIVERE : 

If there must indeed be a fight, 

we’d be wiser to keep it here,

and avoid entering the citadel.

ARTHUR : 

If ? Bedivere, please.

You know it cannot be avoided.

GIANT!

YOU ASKED TO SEE ME!

HERE I AM!

[ percy is intrigued ]

GIANT : 

Arthur Pendragon.

At last.

Prepare to die.

ROUND TABLE TRIVIA 

According to popular belief, giants are demigods who came from Ireland, where they were called “Fomorians”.

They’re generally between 3.50 and 5m tall, even if there have been notable exceptions.

PERCIVAL : 

Are you a giant, sir?

ARTHUR : 

No, I’m just under 2 meters tall. I’d be a ridiculously tiny giant.

Giants aren’t considered to be fay, as they don’t use magic.

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