As I Was Saying

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“…as I was saying…”

“Don’t start with that dribble again. If I’ve heard your excuses once, I’ve heard them a hundred times. If you ain’t gonna do nothing, then just sit there and be quiet.” 

The elderly man quickly looked away from his wife and slowly rubbed his tongue against the inside of his cheek. His receding gray hair glistened in the evening light as he joined his wife in gently rocking their chairs to the music of the robins singing. Over the years the front porch had become the couple’s favorite place to relax at the end of the day. 

They had been together so long it was hard for him to remember what it was like without her. Some people believe that opposites attract, whereas, others feel it only brings unnecessary hardships and hurt feelings. Despite their differences he knew he had never wanted to be with anyone else. The things she did that once upset him now amused him. A long time ago he had become use to her wily ways of making sure their vacation plans included what she wanted to do. She insisted on keeping their financial records because he was too incompetent to manage them. And yet, quite a few times they had returned home from a trip to find that the bills had not been paid. When he asked how it could be, she swore she had told him about it before the vacation. Of course, when he said he did not remember her telling him, it just reinforced her suspicions that he never listened to what she had to say. 

He always felt she put too much emphasis on money. She thought his indifference was due to a lack of caring. At times he could have sworn that the pupils in her eyes resembled the “$” sign. To her it was a simple matter of survival. The times that irritated him the most was when she appeared to be too interested in his parent’s money. Her level of attention to them increased when she ran short of cash. It was apparent to anyone who knew her that, though she always loved and was helpful to her in-laws, she always remained hopeful that they would share their savings. He felt she should take the same interest in her own parent’s money. Of course, she totally disagreed with his assertions. 

She had been a good mother to the children when they were young. In fact, he sometimes felt jealous over the attention they were getting. He later realized it was not the attention the children were receiving, but instead, the lack of attention that she gave him. Of course, she only had so much energy and could not see why he did not understand that she gave it all in attending to the children. She had worked part time to help and was convinced that with all the different things she did around the house she worked all the time. He only had one job, but it was work to her to just be in the presence of the young ones. She could not relax, as they always needed to be watched. It did not matter that they would quietly sit in front of the television set or play in their room, to her they needed constant attention and this meant she had to always be on the job. 

As the children moved into adolescence, she began nagging more and even shouting at them to conform to her way of doing things. When he complained about the disharmony in the home she said it was not her fault. The children were going to listen to her and they were going to show her respect. No matter how he tried to reason with her she was convinced that things would be done her way. 

Eventually the children left home to start families of their own. She proved herself a loving and caring grandmother. The grandchildren loved coming over to the house and seeing their grandma and grandpa. When she did not agree with her children and their spouses over something, she did not interfere. She tried to be there for them if they needed her but she let them run their own lives. Of course, she did not always see eye-to-eye with her sons-in-law and her daughters-in-law. Though she never said anything to them, she, her sister and their mother would talk for hours on the phone about what had happened and what they would have done different. Times like that reminded him of the old days, when women in the neighborhood would while away the time, leaning over a fence, gossiping over recent events. One time he had to laugh when she complained to her sister about how “controlling” one of her daughters-in-law had become. He quickly reminded her and her sister that they were exactly the same way when they were younger and first married. Immediately he realized he had made a mistake, and turned away when she gave him that “I’m gonna cut you off if we ever start having sex again” look. 

At times he felt the need to confide in someone. Usually it turned out to be one of his sons. He would tell something she had done and how it had bothered him. Later he realized that he had probably been too negative. He had spoken too much. And yet, other times he felt he did not speak enough. No matter how frustrated and annoyed he became his love was undying. It was just easier to vent about what irritated him than it was to sing the praises of the one he loved. 

He enjoyed loud music. She loved the oldies. He relished an off color joke. She was not amused. He was happy being at home. She could hardly wait to vacate to a tropical shore. When she was serious, he was funny. If he was silly, she was amused. When she was afraid, he remained calm. If he was anal, she looked the other way. When she was wrong, he acquiesced. If he was wrong, she understood. When she was sick, he was there. If he got sick, she nursed him to health. They were a couple through the thin, and continued a couple as they got thicker. Though they differed, he loved her and she loved him. 

He slowed his rocking chair and gradually brought it to a stop. The sun had lowered behind the trees and soon they would need to go inside for the night. Without speaking he glanced at her and then quickly looked away. She caught his glance and turned to face him. Finally, he turned to gaze into her dark brown eyes and raised an eyebrow in anticipation. She gave him the smile that always melted his heart. 

“Well, you just gonna sit there all night, or are you gonna tell me about it?” 

He returned her smile and started rocking his chair again. 

“…as I was saying…”

THE END

Copyright ©2005 by Jerry W. Crews