Sailing the Seas of Cheese

Break out the nachos! because this is some cheesy min-max goodness

Ok, I played around with various ideas, races and classes so here goes...

Born the youngest son in a large peasant family on the outskirts of the city of Netîri. The idea of endlessly hacking away at the jungle to raise a crop of stunted turnips and skinny mud covered children of his own never made Dun Paduse feel particularly content. That is until he turned 16 and ran off to the city to find fortune and fame and found out that getting drunk and meeting a press gang in a dark alley while puking his guts up was much, much worse.

The following year was a blur of back breaking labor and constant beatings, his fading memories of the farm seemed like one of the seven heavens. Apparently others thought so too, a few days later most of the crew mutinied after picking up a cargo of fine elven wines. It wasn't long until the crew was passed out after merrily drinking themselves into a stupor while murdering and dismembering the captain and his officers. As the sun set a few were still feeding bits to the sharks that always followed the slave galleys, then the weather-pennant on the stern began to flutter.

Within moments a fierce squall set upon the ship and those seamen still awake ran around the deck unsure what to do, some lowered the sails, others began to pray or curse the gods as the sky darkened. In the pitch black the waves grew ever higher, tossing the ship about like a toy. Dun tied himself to the mizzen mast as wave after wave crashed over the ship and after what seemed like years, finally passed out, cold and exhausted.

When Dun came to, the ship was beached on an island covered in shadowy black trees, the sky was wrong and he could hear drums. The few crew members left alive didn't put up much of a fight when the shadar-kai came.

Again Dun faded into darkness when someone clubbed him from behind. He awoke to the sound of someone screaming, unable to see, his mind formed horrible images, when he tried to move he realized he was bound and a voice whispered to him from the darkness in a language he did not know. Dun and two others were spared, the haruspicer said Wee Jas had other plans for them, they were to rebuild the ship and join its crew in red handed raids and wanton butchery.

The crimson sailed ship of reavers stained the shores of that dark land for a year and a day before getting caught in a storm. The raging winds tore the sails and the foundering ship smashed into the jagged coast, dragging all but one down into the depths.

When Duns unconscious body washed ashore he was found by some fisherman and taken to Baron Vilks castle. As he slowly recovered his strength he noticed the odd looks people gave him and when he finally looked into a mirror he didn't recognize the face staring back at him, his hair, skin and right eye had turned snow white while in the Plane of Shadow.

Baron Vilks had adventured in his younger days and became lord of his own castle through the strength of his sword arm and by gathering like minded souls to serve him. Half-mad, destitute and with no where to go Dun chose to serve the baron and swore an oath of fealty to the one man who had shown him kindness.

Less than a month later a large raiding party of brigands ambushed the patrol Dun was in, he begged for his life and offered to help them take the castle in exchange for his life. Dressed in the uniforms of the slain guardsmen with the rest pretending to be prisoners Dun led the bandits into the castle and betrayed his lord.

When the fighting started he rode off as flames lept up the walls of the castle behind him, screams still echoing in the night.

Dun is back in Netiri and has changed his name to Kas Nakts.

He wears a holy symbol of Wee Jas and keeps a barbed dagger on his belt, trophies from his pirate days. He wears a chain shirt and has a bastard sword strapped to his back, gifts from Baron Vilks. He traded his horse for passage back home and traded his boots and cloak for a hot meal and a nights stay in the Ragana Inn...

HT: 5'10"

WT: 150

Hair: White

Skin: Pale White

Eyes: one White and one Green

Class - (combining two fighter variants - sneak attack & thug)

Fighter Variant

Some fighters prefer stealth and cunning over martial skill. This variant can also be combined with the thug variant. Gain - Sneak attack (as rogue), Lose - Bonus feats.

Fighter Variant: Thug

Class Skills - Bluff (Cha), Climb (Str), Craft (Int), Gather Information (Cha), Handle Animal (Cha), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Knowledge (local) (Int), Ride (Dex), Sleight of Hand (Dex), and Swim (Str).

The thug gains skill points per level equal to 4 + Int modifier (and has this number x4 at 1st level).

Thugs are proficient with all simple and martial weapons and with light armor.

Race

Human

Its some sort of odd anthropomorphic hairless river ape, I've heard of them but not sure where, they are in the Players Handbook

Medium Humanoid (Human), base land speed is 30 feet, No-Light Vision: A human can see as far as a human in starlight, moonlight, torchlight, and similar conditions of poor illumination.

Stats

Str 14

Dex 17

Con 8

Int 14

Wis 13

Cha 10

Alignment

Chaotic Neutral

1 swashbuckler - two weapon fighting and EWP bastard sword

(flaws - murky eyed and shaky - point blank shot, EWP barbed dagger)

2 fighter - SA1d6

3 fighter - far shot

4 fighter - SA2d6 - add 1 to dexterity

5 fighter

6 fighter - SA3d6 - two weapon pounce (PH2)

7 ronin - SA4d6

8 swordsage - elder mountain hammer, assassin's stance (SA+2d6) - add 1 to wisdom 

9 swordsage - improved two weapon fighting

10 invisible blade - 1d6 dagger sneak attack

11 invisible blade

12 invisible blade - 2d6 dagger sneak attack - add 1 to dexterity - Greater Two-Weapon Fighting

13