The Exile of the Nomads

Prelude

1 After the Nomad was raised from the dead, he and his apostles headed back to Syria where he previously was. 2 When he approached the capital, he saw Pope Andersen's successor, Pope Tyler, and his former underpaid Starbucks co-workers throwing decaf chi lattes at his followers; killing them instantly. Now Pope Tyler hated the Nomad, he did not love the Nomad with all his three brain cells and he handstands on his understanding. 3 They then saw St. Tony getting crucified but his arms were too small for the big nails and the nails tore out of his small arms and he and dangled over his the frontside of the cross till he fell and died. They tried to rescue him but their attempts were futile. 4  So the Nomad and his followers hastily ran across the border into Iraq.

The Trip to the Gypsy

2 When the Nomad and a good many of his followers were in Iraq where they sneakily met the General Robust Gypsy who lived there. He told them to go to the mountains beyond the Black Sea. 2 They would find St. Andersen there. The followers were very confused because St. Andersen became corrupt and wicked, but the Nomad knew what was happening. 3 The Nomad and his disciples left for the mountains and went along for 40 days until they arrived.

Mountainous Arrival

3 Forty days had passed but then they arrived at the mountains. But while they were on a high mount, a bright and angelic deity descended upon them, and coming out of his hand was St. Andersen. 2 He was forgiven of his wrongdoings and came to them in said, "Behold ye! I come down with thy soul redeemed from thy malversation!" 3 The Nomad spoke, "Truly I tell you." The deity then said, "You must gather the discipleship and go to the temple on the highest hill and the Nomad will share with you all something of utmost importance." 

The Great Ascension

4 As the deity told them they went to the church on the highest hill and the Nomad stood behind the high altar 2 and the disciples who stood before him of whom are: Andersen, Tucker, Bryson, Eggroll, Tyler, Jake of Corinth, Christian, Jackson, Maia, Parker, Bjorn, Oakley, Claire, Tony, Jake of Balawat, Dano, Micah, Addison, Matthew, Dantes, Gypsy, and Alex. 3 Then the Nomad asked, "My only true sons and daughters; do you love me wholeheartedly?" The disciples responded, "We love you above board." The Nomad responded, "Feed my lambs, of whom I've raised."

5 After the Nomad said these things to St. Andersen, he gave them a blessing and ascended into heaven and told them that he would be back soon and the Cat-One would fall when he came back. The Disciples went to a meeting room and plotted to give revenge on Pope Tyler. 2 They said that they were going to take back Syria.