I’ve had my share of humbling experiences as a parent, but in the intersection between my jobs as parent and teacher, one stands out.

My son was about 12 or 13 and I had asked him a couple of times to do something. When he asked me to tell him again what it was he was supposed to do, I'm sure I gave a dramatic heavy sigh, rolled my eyes and said, “I already told you”.

His response? “Do you think I’d ask you if I knew what I was supposed to do?”

That changed everything for me.

I realized that saying, “You should know that” is probably one of the most spectacularly unhelpful responses to a question. When we’re 2 years old and we ask a question, no one assumes we should know anything and they answer the question. I’m not sure when it changes, but at some point, people start assuming we should know the answers to the questions we’re asking. With that expectation comes the “You should know” answer, followed by our embarrassment at not knowing and ultimately our reluctance to ask any question at all.

Curiosity and questioning are keys to learning and deep understanding. Which is why I strive to nurture questioning skills and create a culture that invites questions and thrives on curiosity.

Sometimes questions have no answers. Sometimes the questions are deep and challenging. In a world that faces profound social and environmental challenges, we need fewer people who profess to have all the answers and more people like my friend and colleague Nancy Bridgeman who have the courage to ask difficult questions, say “I don’t know” and then invite others to work together to find solutions.

I recall many students who have embraced the idea that deep understanding comes from continuing to ask questions. Lia and Tia decided in December of their grade 8 year that their education was up to them and they were going to ask questions in class without caring what any of the other students thought about them. The same went for Olivia and Aspen who became passionate question-askers who would continue to question until they were sure they understood. The really cool thing is that these students were classroom heroes because they had the courage to ask questions that everyone else was thinking.

Questioning is the engine that drives inquiry in learning. Questioning not only helps us clarify what we don't know, it helps us make connections so that what we learn sticks and helps build our critical thinking skills.

Asking questions is like exercise. The only way to improve is to practice.