Hope

Hope

Written and illustrated by Meredith Lewis

Dedicated to My family and wonderful grandfather

“If I call on you, say your full name, how old you are,what your favorite color is, and why you are here. Marshall, how about you go first,” said Martha, the therapist.

“Hello,” said Marshall in a very shy voice. Which is not the best thing when you are in group therapy for the first time. He didn’t know exactly why he was so uncomfortable there, but he guessed it was because he was a 16 year old sitting in a wide circle with grandmas and grampa’s. The youngest one besides him was a woman across the room, who looked to be in her twenties. “My name is Marshall DiGrelii. I am 16 years old, my favorite color is green, and I am here because….,”. He couldn’t think of any possible reason why he was there. “I don’t know why.”

“Come on. Try to think,” Martha said. As If there was always one person in the group who acted this way. “If you don’t know why you are here, is there a person who thinks you really need this? If so, you should share why they think you should be here.” When she looked at him, her face revealed that what she saw didn’t really surprise her. There Marshall sat with his arms crossed with his fingernails digging into his opposite arm, and his legs squeezed together and very tense.

“Well,” said Marshall “My mom thinks I should be here.” He took a crackly breath the way you would as if you were about to confess about something you did wrong.

“Soooo why does she think you should be here,” said Martha like she was going to blow up with impatience. There came a cough from across the room. Marshall heard a yawn and saw that it was coming from a person who looked as if he had come here from work. There was another yawn. So Marshall expected they were getting bored so he gained enough confidence to answer the question.

“She thinks I should be here because my little sister has……..Cancer.”

“Well thath nuttin compared to my Wizzy,” said a voice who came from across the room. It sounded like a tough voice. “I will go next,” said the voice again. Then Marshall lifted his head to see a guy who seemed to be a biker with a long white beard and white bushy eyebrows. He was wearing a leather vest with patches and he had big muscles. He was trying to keep tears in. Marshall never thought he would find himself in this situation. At a group therapy session with a biker trying to keep from crying about….. he didn’t know what.

The man said, with a somewhat scratchy voice, “My name ith Horten Frap but you guys can call me Vroom becauthe I ride the highway of life man. I recently lost my favorite loved one,” he paused “My cat…” he took a small unnoticeable breath “Wizzy meant everythin to me. On Monday nights we would cuddle and drink hot chocolate. On Tuesday night we would order tacos from Steve’s hot and spicy taco shack. On Wednesday night we would sit in front of our electric fireplace and sing fun campfire songs like Put Another Log On The fire and-”

“Ok ,Vrooom is it-?” said Martha

“No its Vroom with only two o’s” he said, as if this should be obvious.

“Well then Vroom I think you’ve explained. No, said enough. Why don’t we move on to someone else.” Marshall honestly didn’t like Martha. She was too impatient and a bit insensitive.

***

“Mom!!!!!!!!!” said Marshall as he stepped into the house. “Mom. Do I need to be in this stinky group therapy? I don’t know anybody there and I am the youngest one and I don’t like Martha,” He stopped because he was out of breath.

“And uhhh…. who is Martha sweety?” said Tasha DiGrelli, Marshalls mom.

“Martha Green,” he said as if his mom should know this really well.

“Marshall, don’t expect me to know everything,” she said in an angry tone.

“She is the therapist, and you’ve met her multiple times.”

“Are you hungry? Is that why you are angry, sweets?” said Tasha in a babyish way.

Marshall was so angry at his mom, so he stampeded up the stairs, and into his room with heavy footsteps. He ran right over to his bed and flopped onto it. He sat up right, reached over to his night stand and grabbed the book he was reading, “The Great Gatsby”. He read for quite awhile. He often zoned out and thought about his poor, sick sister. Marshall soon got drowsy and fell asleep without any dinner.

***

Marshall woke up to the sound of his Mother on the phone with who he thought was Lindsey's teacher. Marshall was wondering why Tasha was on the phone so early in the morning until he turned onto his side and saw the time on his clock. It was 8:00am and he had to be at school at 8:20 which would leave no time for him to get up out of bed, get dressed, eat breakfast, brush his teeth and drive to school. What really surprised him was that his Mom hadn’t woken him up. So Marshall pulled the blankets off of his body and walked silently halfway down stairs. He sat there for a little while, listening to his mom’s conversation. After his mom hung up he glided down the rest of the stairs. There his mother sat at the dinner table with her hands tightly around her coffee mug looking into space. It seemed to Marshall that something was probably wrong with Lindsey. Lindsey, Marshalls 7 year old little sister, had recently been diagnosed with leukemia. Marshall had a feeling that Lindsey hadn’t been feeling well that day and was not going to be going to school today. Marshall went down and sat next to Tasha.

***

“How is Lindsey doing?” asked Marshall in a quiet respectful voice.

“She is not going to school today,” Tasha said.

“Are you going to take her to the doctor?” he said.

“I think Lindsey is going to need to be transported to the hospital soon,” she said in a uneasy voice. “She is getting really sick.”

“I know,” said Marshall. Marshall had been working at a local market lately because his mom had to quit her job so she could take care of Lindsey. His family was struggling from the weight of the doctor bills.

“I just want my baby to be healthy,” She started to cry a little.

“Mom i’m sure dad is watching over Lindsey. She will be better in no time. I’m positive.” All he wanted was to make Lindsey healthier and his mom high spirited.

“Thank you, Marshall. You know exactly how to make me feel better,” she said.

***

“Hey, Laura,” said Marshall in the hallway right outside of geometry class.

“Hi, Marshall,” said Laura. Laura was Marshall’s only real friend. They had known each other since 5th grade. “Shouldn’t you be getting to your next class?” said Laura

“The bell is about to ring,” said Laura in a I’m more coordinated than you way. Laura was always so organized. Even her purple shirt and gray skinny jeans were perfectly ironed.

Marshall heard the bell ring and quickly said, “Well, I am right next to my class. Bye.”

***

After school Marshall headed to the local market. He worked about three hours at the market on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. His job was to stack all the items on the shelves. He always worked his hardest because he knew every single penny helped his precious little sister get better. Though he didn’t get paid that much, he never stopped working. When he was half way through stacking the peanut butter jars he got a call from his mom. “Hi, mom,” said Marshall.

“Hey,” She said this with a very scared and shaky voice. It sounded like she was crying.

“What’s the matter?” He started to speak fast. He was worried that something bad had happened. He started to the coat rack.

“Hurry to the hospital,” she said.

“Mom, what is going on?” Marshall got prepared for some bad news about Lindsey.

As he suspected his mom said, “I brought Lindsey to the hospital. She isn’t getting better.”

“I’m on my way,” said Marshall.

***

“Hi,” said Marshall to Lindsey. He was beside her hospital bed.

“Hi,” Lindsey said. “How was school?” she said excitedly. Marshall always wondered how she could always stay happy. “ How is Laura?” she said. She adored Laura.

“Laura is fine,” he said, “Enough about me. How are you?”

“Do you have to ask?” Lindsey said.

“Honestly, I have to,” said Marshall in a somewhat silly voice.

“Stop kidding around. How is it I’m younger than you but in some ways I am still more mature than you,” she said, giggling.

“Soooo how are you?” he said.

“Better.” She said that like a million other people had already asked.

“Do you want anything?” said Marshall

“No, I am good,” she said. “Thanks though.”

***

The next day at school Marshall went to Laura’s locker. There were no decorations or books in her locker (Marshall got in the locker because Laura gave Marshall the passcode). It’s probably the wrong locker. Though how would I be able to unlock it? He didn’t know where she was. So he went to the Principal's office .

“May I speak to the Principal please?” said Marshall.

“Is it an emergency?” said the lady at the front desk. Her name tag said Myrtle. Marshall wondered if she was named Myrtle after the beach or maybe she was named after Myrtle from The Great Gatsby. If she was named after Myrtle from The Great Gatsby he hoped that she wasn’t that crazy.

“No,” Marshall said. “Can I just ask you something?”

“I am not allowed to give away any sort of information and if it isn’t an emergency you are going to have to get in line.” She pointed to a long line that stretched into the hallway. It had to be at least 20 locker units.

“Can I come back after block 2?” he said impatiently.

“Of course,” the lady said. She wasn’t paying attention. Marshall peeked over the desk at the computer. It looked like she was playing solitaire.

“K bye,” said Marshall as he walked out of the room and the next person entered.

***

“Hi,” said Marshall to the lady behind the desk. “I’m back” he said in a silly voice.

“You may see Principal Henry now,” Myrtle said.

“Thank you,” Marshall said. He walked into the office.

“Hi,” said principal Henry. The room was made of almost all wood. It was a mapley color and the wood was covered in what looked like a sort of glaze. The office smelled like paper.

“Hello,” said Marshall. He was for some reason really nervous. His feet were getting sweaty and tingly.

“So, how can I help you?” Henry lifted his head from looking at a paper and removed his glasses.

“I didn’t see any decorations or books in Laura’s locker,” said Marshall worriedly.

“ Who is this?” said Henry “ Laura….” Henry was looking for a last name.

“Garcia,” Marshall replied.

“Oh. Yeah!” Henry exclaimed. His voice became calmer. “She recently moved to Alabama,” said Henry.

“Alabama!” Marshall said surprised. He suddenly felt lonely and, for some reason he didn’t know, abandoned.

“Her family was having some sort of a problem so they had to move unexpectedly. Besides, Marshall that is only one state away,” Principle Henry stated while pointing to a map behind him.

“Oh right, that is not so bad and we live on the edge of Georgia too,” Marshall said.

“You will definitely be able to see her again,” Henry said. “Is she your girlfriend or something?” One of his eyebrows raised and the other one sank.

“Ew, absolutely positively no! We are just friends.” said Marshall defensively. He over exaggerated the absolutely.

“Oh well then. Nevermind” Henry said. “Is that all the information you need?” Henry said like he was very bored.

“Yes, thank you,” said Marshall sadly.

***

Three weeks later

Marshall went to see Lindsey at the hospital after school.

“Hi, Marshall,” said Lindsey. Her face was very pale.

“Hi,” said Marshall as he sat down in the chair next to the hospital bed.

“Guess what,” said Lindsey excitedly.

“What?” said Marshall expecting her to say she had twenty pudding packs.

“Well, when I asked if I could have some pudding and the candy striper brought the pudding pouch, guess who it was!” she said.

“Who?” Marshall was getting excited.

“It was…………..Laura!” she said that like she hadn’t seen Laura in three years. “I think she wants to be a nurse when she is older and this is the closest hospital so she got an internship here?” she said in an unsure tone.

“Do you think she is still here?” said Marshall starting to walk away.

“Probably not, but you could most likely bump into her tomorrow,” Lindsey said. She started a coughing fit.

“Well, tomorrow after work I could see you and Laura,” said Marshall really hyped up. A doctor walked in and asked Marshall to leave. So Marshall said goodbye and left.

***

Today was the day that Marshall was going to see Laura. So right after school he sprinted to the local market so he could finish his shift as soon as possible.

Marshall hurried into the market and put his apron on. After about 45 minutes his shift was almost over. He got a phone call from his mom. His mom was crying so much and she quietly whispered into the phone. “Lindsey” she took a shaky breath just like him in the group therapy session, “Lindsey just…… passed,” said Marshalls mom.

Marshall felt a tear dripping down his cheeks. So he told his mom he would be right there. As he bolted to the hospital he went back into his mind and realized how focused he was on Laura that he hadn’t gotten any time to really spend time with Lindsey. His hands were getting clammy from all the guilt piling up inside. He could feel the really meaningful tears coming down his cheeks. Once he finally got to the hospital he saw Lindsey there lying pale faced and under her eyes were really droopy. He started balling because he knew that Lindsey didn’t get the long life she deserved.

.

10 Years Later

Marshall grew up believing that Lindsey did not get the life she deserved and he didn’t want other families to suffer going through what his family went through so Marshall grew up and graduated med school and became a Leukemia specialist. He did not want a poor child to suffer and not get the life that they deserved. Laura became a nurse and worked very hard. Sadly Marshall and Laura didn’t get to see each other a lot but they occasionally bumped into each other and talked. Lindsey was having a good time in heaven and eventually she and her mom met up in heaven. So everybody in the family was always together because Marshall got to see kids like Lindsey everyday and Lindsey and their mom were always watching over Marshall.