The Traps of Resentment, Bitterness, Hatred and Anger

The Traps of Resentment, Bitterness, Hatred and Anger

You, suffering from emotional pain, may say, “Why do I have to repent? I haven’t done anything wrong, but wrong has been done to me. I am a victim. I am in pain. I need healing. What does repentance have to do with my pain? I should be getting apologies, not being asked to apologize!”

Yes, you have the right to feel the way you do: Bitter and angry towards the perpetrator and resentful towards your offender. This is the most “natural” response to any assault. The secular world validates these feelings. You, most likely, have held this position and consequently have exercised your right to be bitter and angry for how many long years ____? Now, this is what the Lord Himself tells you, 

I take no pleasure in the death of anyone, declares the Sovereign Lord. Repent and live! (Ezekiel 18:32) 

A response of fury of indignation is warranted here: How could victims heap death on their souls? How could victims of injustice share the same punishment as the offenders? Let's consider turning to the Scripture for answers. What have you gained from being angry, bitter, and resentful? The  Apostle Paul says, 

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. (Galatians 6:7-8)

What have you been reaping for the last (how many) ___ long years? Bitterness? Resentment? Anger? Do you realize that what you have sown are the seeds of these same attitudes deep in your heart? Do you know that engaging in these practices has allowed them to grow roots deep inside your soul? They have become part of your character. Are you now happy with the harvest? No, sowing bitterness brought you a harvest of tears and desperation. Your pain is further exacerbated, it has turned into intolerable misery. Like the Israelites, you groan, “I am wasting away.” And like them, you are more likely to refuse to recognize the root problem of your condition, which is the lack of repentance from the sin of bitterness, anger, animosity, and resentment. Sowing and reaping is a spiritual law. The secular world refers to it as karma. 

The Bible gives us a simple spiritual rule: If a bad fruit is present in the believer’s life, there is undead flesh “feeding” on unrepentant sin. Bitterness, resentment, animosity, and anger are bad fruits in the life of a believer. They are red flags, warning of a “breached security” in the armor of God. How long is one able to resist the incessant attacks of the enemy before the Devil takes a foothold (Ephesians 4:27-29) in the heart and begins his evil work of kill, steal, and destroy (John 10:10)? The best protection strategy of the believer is to be armed with the knowledge of how to thwart these attacks. Again, it is straightforward: Repentance from bitterness, resentment, and anger closes all access doors, thus denying the enemy legal permission to enter and stay. The warning to us is stern:

See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. (Hebrews 12:15)

Don’t sow bitterness, resentment, and anger so you won’t reap their bitter fruit. Don’t be involved in these sinful practices of the flesh and you will see how their wickedness will flee you. Instead, do what Jesus said those who abide in Him are to do: 

Love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in Heaven. (Matthew 5:44)

Instead of resentment and bitterness, the  Apostle Paul advises us to put into practice an opposite attitude. 

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. (Galatians 6:9-10)

Regarding your perpetrator, consider the biblical advice to show goodness towards the offender,

You will heap burning coals on their heads, and the Lord will reward you. (Proverbs 25:22)

Your healing is not in revengeful thoughts and bitter emotions. The key to beginning the process of healing is repentance from them! No one can escape from prison unless the fortified walls have been weakened from inside. 

As no one is discharged in time of war, so wickedness will not release those who practice it. (Ecclesiastes 8:8b)

Wickedness will flee if one repents, renounces, and hauls it to the cross, declaring it dead. Bitterness, resentment, and anger are the wickedness you must release through repentance and death on the cross. They don’t exist in the Kingdom of God; they should not be part of a believer’s life either. 

The prison walls you are held behind are the walls built by your own sin, and the war you are engaged in is a war of life and death. How you come out of this war depends on how you deal with sin. Sin does not release those who practice it, only those who renounce it and repent from it. “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near,” were the first words John the Baptist preached (Matthew 3:2). “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near,” were also the first words Jesus preached at the beginning of His ministry (Matthew 4:17). Jesus sent out the twelve disciples with the instruction to preach repentance and heal the sick (Mark 6:12,13). And when the cities that witnessed Jesus’ miracles remained unrepentant, He denounced them (Matthew 11:20). The key to entering the kingdom of God is repentance. The key to remaining in the kingdom of God is the practice of daily repentance. 

Something happens in the heavenly realm when we approach God with a broken spirit. We are considered blessed, and we are allowed to enter the kingdom of God (Matthew 5:3). God passes judgment if we say, “I haven't sinned” (Jeremiah 2:35). But, If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1: 9). This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says, 

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength. (Isaiah 30:15)

King David was a man after God’s own heart. His wholehearted repentance from sin brought him this position despite his many faults. In Psalm 32, King David articulated his own experience with sin and repentance:

Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to You and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord”– and You forgave the guilt of my sin. Therefore, let everyone who is godly pray to You while You may be found. (Psalm 32:1-6)

The Lord can be found, and His Word can indeed still the raging waters of life. He calls us to enter into His presence, where the rising storm is silenced before it becomes a threat and where the provisions for the journey on the narrow road are never depleted. The Lord God is never weary of crying out after His children. 

Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare. Give ear and come to me; hear me, that your soul may live. (Isaiah 55:1-3)