The Slow Dungeon Dance

Turn Order

Turn Order is entered when one or more creatures would normally make their Combat Kick Ass and Combat Bad Ass Checks to determine how they perform in combat. Instead, each creature participating in the combat rolls 1d12. They then individually add their Reaction Bonus to the result. A creature’s Reaction Bonus is equal to the sum of all its Ability Scores divided by three ([Combat Kick Ass + Combat Bad Ass + Smart Ass]/3), rounded down. The creatures then take Turns in descending order based on their results, returning to the beginning once every creature in the combat has taken a Turn. A creature has three actions in each Turn, which it may use as it chooses.

Hit Points

In addition to Damage Conditions, the Slow Dungeon Dance uses Hit Points to track how injured a creature is. Hit Points are a numeric representation of how close a creature is to losing the ability to function normally. A creature’s Hit Points are equal to its Combat Bad Ass plus twelve (12 + Combat Bad Ass). When a creature reaches zero Hit Points, it gains the Unconscious Damage Condition or a similar Damage Condition that incapacitates it, at Game Master discretion.

Armor

A creature has a DC for how hard it is to reduce its Hit Points, called its Armor. A creature’s Armor is equal to its Bad Ass plus six (6 + Combat Bad Ass).

Attack Check

To reduce another creature’s Hit Points, a creature must make an Attack Check. To make an Attack Check, it must roll a twelve-sided die and increase the result by its Combat Kick Ass (1d12 + Combat Kick Ass). It normally takes two actions to make an attack, but the Game Master may adjust this based on the nature and circumstance of the Attack. If the Attack Check’s result is higher than the attacked creature’s Armor (6 + Combat Bad Ass), the attacked creature reduces its Hit Points (12 + Combat Bad Ass) by the attacking creature’s Combat Kick Ass. If a Game Master wants to prolong combat in their game, they can have the Hit Point reduction caused by Attacks only be half of the attacking creature’s Combat Kick Ass, or any other percentage they choose.

Kill Checks

As an action, any creature may make a Kill Check against a creature with the Unconscious Damage Condition or that is otherwise unable to defend itself. To make a Kill Check, a creature rolls a twelve-sided die and increases the result by its Combat Kick Ass (1d12 + Combat Kick Ass). If the result is higher than the targeted creature’s Combat Kick Ass, the targeted creature gains the Death Damage Condition.

Martial Artist and Tough

Creatures use their Combat Kick Ass and Combat Bad Ass in place of their Kick Ass and Bad Ass for Reaction Bonuses, Hit Points, Armor and Attack Checks. This means Features like Martial Artist, Tough, Fragile and Inept Combatant heavily affect a creature’s abilities during combat, but do not affect its abilities outside combat.

Regaining Hit Points

Any Feature or effect that removes Damage Conditions affecting the physical body can restore lost Hit Points (12 + Combat Bad Ass). When a Damage Condition affecting the physical body would be removed, instead roll 1d4 and increase the targeted creature’s Hit Points by the result. A creature cannot have more Hit Points than its Combat Bad Ass plus twelve. Using a Feature or effect to restore Hit Points replaces its normal effect of removing a Damage Condition.

Options In Options

The following rules are optional additions to the Slow Dungeon Dance rules. They each alter the style of play or help with a potential problem, but are left up to the individual group to use, ignore or reimagine.

Dice Addict

Rolling a wide variety of dice consumes time, but also soothes the cravings of even the most far gone dice addict. Rather than reduce a successfully attacked creature’s Hit Points (12 + Combat Bad Ass) by the attacking creature’s Combat Kick Ass, the Dice Addict rule instead gives all weapons a type of damage die: d2 (a coin), 1d3 (three-sided), 1d4 (four-sided) or 1d6 (six-sided). When an Attack Check (1d12 + Combat Kick Ass) is successful, the attacking creature rolls a number of its weapon’s dice type equal to half the attacking creature’s Combat Kick Ass, rounded up. The Game Master chooses what type of dice a given weapon has. Unarmed creatures roll two-sided dice.

Eight Percent

If using the Eight Percent rule, any Attack Check (1d12 + Combat Kick Ass) that rolls a 12 on the twelve-sided die automatically succeeds and reduces the attacked creature’s Hit Points (12 + Combat Kick Ass), even if the final result would still be equal to or less than the target’s Armor (6 + Combat Bad Ass). Moreover, the attacked creature has its Hit Points reduced by double the attacking creature’s Combat Kick Ass. However, any Attack Check that rolls a 1 on the twelve-sided die automatically fails and does not reduce the attacked creature’s Hit Points, even if the result is still higher than the attacked creature’s Armor. In addition, the attacking creature accidentally hits someone else, reducing the Hit Points of itself or another nearby creature it considers an alley by its Combat Kick Ass, at Game Master discretion.

Goblin Battle Tactics

Using the Goblin Battle Tactics rule can help to represent the split-second decision making of a life and death situation, but may be difficult for players who are not yet familiar with the game or their characters. At the beginning of each player’s Turn, they roll a twelve-sided die and increase the result by their character’s Smart Ass. Whatever the result is, they have that many words to explain what they do during their Turn. Answering questions from the Game Master about how their planned course of action is achieved and narrating the plan’s execution does not count against the word limit. However, they must stick to the plan explained within their word limit.

Psychological Warfare

Combat is typically the time for the physically skilled to shine. However, it can also leave the players of physically inept characters with little to do when their Turn comes around. The Psychological Warfare rules allow a creature to make Emotional Attack Checks against other creatures to demoralize. An Emotional Attack Check requires the attacking creature to roll a twelve-sided die and increase the result by its Smart Ass (1d12 + Smart Ass). If the result is higher than the attacked creature’s Emotional Armor, the targeted creature takes Emotional Damage equal to the attacking creature’s Smart Ass. A creature’s Emotional Armor is equal to its Smart Ass plus six (6 + Smart Ass). When a creature gains Emotional Damage from a similar source equal to twice its current Hit Points, it stops fighting and attempts to get out of combat. Whether it surrenders, flees or attempts a different course of action is based on how the Emotional Damage was acquired and at Game Master discretion.