"Us Time" is fun! (Love is fun! ๐) Private Retreat
A Private Retreat is a monthly event (at least) for just you and your spouse! This can be an overnighter or a weekend (i.e. bed & breakfast, camping, hotel etc.), but should at least be a good part of a day (i.e. a Saturday or Sunday at least 5 to 6 hours).
Important note: If the only private retreat you can do is on your date night, that's perfect. But if you're treating your date night as a private retreat in should included some "Getting to Know You - Guided Conversations." That's what makes it a "Private Retreat." ๐ฅฐ These shares can sometimes feel awkward. Push through this. You'll enjoy the results.ย
Guidelines
1) Your retreat should include relaxation, good food, walks in nature, hammocks, games, boating, reading something together, watching movies, or whatever you would both enjoy.
2) Please do not talk about your relationship. Note that as with Date Night, a Private Retreat is also a Relationship Cleanse.
3) Sometime during your retreat, include at least 30 minutes getting to know each other e.g. Getting to Know You - Guided Conversations, especially Write & Share. If you haven't done it yet, you could also do Love Map and/or Particulars)ย
4) If you're going somewhere with bad cell reception (which is often the case), bring a printed copy of this page along with pages from some of the Getting to Know You ย exercises mentioned here. ย
The ideal sequence in my opinion, is:ย
Friday Night: Walk and/or movie at a bed and breakfast, campsite or hotel.
Saturday morning, choose one or more of the following and spend at least 30 minutes, engaged in it (click on each for details):ย
๐ Write & Share &/orย
๐ Face to Face &/orย
๐ Love Map and/orย
๐ Particulars.
Saturday afternoon- anything you both enjoy and that lends itself to you enjoying each other i.e. kayaking, hammocks, more hiking, fishing, spiritual conversations, another favorite movie (as long as you're holding hands), a special meal etc.
The above are all just suggestions. Make your retreat work for you, even if you just have time for 5 or 6 hours away from your home, together, and alone and include some โGetting to Know Youโ time.
๐ฎ Note that if things go south in any your sharing ("Getting to know you" conversations), I strongly suggest running out of your hotel or campsite or even from the blanket you're sitting on outside. Stay together but move as fast as you safely can, as if you're running from something awful, chasing you. One of you could initiate this protocol by getting up and saying, "O.K. I'm going to RUN from my negative, defensive or accusing self right now, as fast as I can. Would you join me?" ย Note: If you end up going alone, add, "I'll be back in 10 minutes."ย Later, put whatever bee got in your bonnet on your Request List.
Please consider scheduling 2 or 3 Private Retreats right away! ๐
P.S. Do not compare yourself to the couple pictured above. They are paid models. No one should be having that much fun, or... I could be wrong.๐คจ Let me know.