Fusion 8
You are attuned to supreme relaxation when you see that discomfort is there is the texture of every moment. Discomfort of uncertainty, discomfort of others not behaving as you want, discomfort of things not maturing as you want. Can you feel this discomfort? Suddenly, you find yourself on the fluid ground. Everything springs out of this discomfort, this fluidness. You are on the Original ground. Forgetting this discomfort is dullness, decay.
There is no dearth of ideas, activities, practices (including religious-spiritual) that ‘allure’ you to give peace, positivity, stability, stable relief and so on. These ideas, activities, practices attract you as you want to escape, run away from the discomfort, irritation your daily life is giving you. Your attraction to peace, stable relief and so on binds you to non-peace, frustration, conflicts. Once you notice this fact-the fused state takes over.
Q.- Is meditation necessary to keep the mind at peace or to keep it under control?
Body and brain require food and sleep to recharge. This is sufficient, complete in itself. You are essentially at peace, at rest unless you are in immediate physical danger. Unless you recognize this fact-any practice, device as meditation and so on to bring peace and control is to seek relief by running away from what you do not like. The energy remains dissipated.
Can you stand at this moment ‘as it is’ (except when you are in immediate physical danger)-however difficult the situation is, however degrading the moment is, however intimidating you are feeling, however uncertain, confused you are-when your mind is not finding consoling, solacing ideas? In these fluid moments, the touch of the Original may happen.
No theory, no religious-spiritual idea, no ‘be happy’ slogan is helpful when we are insulted, when we face loss, when something untoward happens, when we find ourselves in an embarrassing situation. Only when you are okay with that feeling of frustration, when you are okay with that uneasy feeling that your whole energy is concentrated. You are grounded to totality.
You are thinking as if you will feel settled, okay, free when you have more money, when your questions about life, about existence are answered, solved, when your children grow up and are settled, when you reach at some position in your work or job and so on. By this thinking, you are trying to seek relief away from now, by depending upon tomorrow.
Can you see that you are in that state now, you are in a relieved state now as you are not in immediate physical danger? Now your mind automatically forms the image of what you want, what you want to do. The solution, the fulfillment happens.
If the solution, the fulfillment does not happen?
This question does not bother you as there is no satisfactory end to what you want. The desires, the images, the demands are continuously happening.
You have seen the self-sustained process of life.
You are not feeling sorrow, anger, fear, anxiety (uncertainty) but simply trying to throw them away from your mind. This is what causes the trouble. You are under the illusion as if sorrow and so on are to be covered up or glossed over or thrown away. Nothing can be thrown out of the mind. If only for once you touch anger, fear, anxiety, sorrow without any escape, without any explanation, justification, condemnation-you touch the fluid ground, total ground. No philosophy can now entice you. You have touched the current of life.
You have been waylaid by the idea that by following certain practices, by following certain theories, you can be stably pleased, stably relieved, you will be at peace. Can you see that you are essentially at peace, you are essentially stable when not in immediate physical danger? This stability is not dependent upon any practice or theory. It is always with you. You are open to the limitless field.
The only point to be noted is that we want (stable) relief from resistance (pain and uncertainty) we face in daily life-by whatever means we want to get it-by addition to possessions, securities, by religious-spiritual ideas, practices , by entertainments. Unless we come to the point that disturbance-relief is the endless, restless process-our energy remains dissipated. We remain seeking. Once this is noticed, energy is concentrated. Disturbance-relief is seen as the self-sustained, endless process.
The same energy is expressed as anger, anxiety, fear, confusion, pleasure, joy. The illusion rejects anger and so on and tries to hold, secure pleasure and so on. Hence dullness, decay.
Awakening happens when you bear the discomfort. All your religious-spiritual ideas, practices, activities simply give you relief from what you do not like. You become bound by the pattern of dislike-relief, as brain requires contrast to operate.
What is the contrast when awakened?
‘What you want’ provides contrast to ‘what happens, what you get’. You are in the limitless field.
Your brain is engaged all the time. This engagement is life. You translate certain engagements as relieving, good, interesting and others as uninteresting, bad, painful. This translation inclines you, attaches you to relieving, good, interesting engagements. The inclination smothers the sensitivity of the brain. Dullness, decay sets in.
Can you see the pull of any desire-desire to eat something, sexual desire, desire to acquire something and so on? Instead of feeling the pull of desire, instead of feeling the pull of contradictory thoughts that arise with the desire, we become busy in taking sides by condemning or justifying the desire-the process of desire is vitiated. Seeing the pull of desire, being with the pull without any ideation is the connection to the Original energy.
If you are carried away by any teachings, any religious-spiritual practices-you are ignoring the basic thing on which mind operates-an alertness* every moment to whatever is happening. Practices, teachings make you ‘wait’ as if this moment is incomplete and completeness will come and stay. The wait kills the enjoying mechanism of the brain. You miss touch of the Original.
*Alertness means-mind has stopped making any theories about ‘what is’, hence total attention to ‘what is’.
Brain requires some desire, some lack, some interest to operate, to remain alive. If you think you can become or have become satisfied, relieved by any possessions, relations, ideas (including religious-spiritual)-you are quelling the energy by this thinking. Dullness, decay may set in.
Movement of a tiny cell as well as that of a giant star is governed by the same phenomenon.
But how can one notice this? What is the phenomenon?
One can notice this only when one sees the movement without any explanation. Just sees it.
The phenomenon is movement itself, the attraction and repulsion.
The same force is propelling all the movements. See any micro movement to see the force.
See how an ant is moving.
See the flowing of river.
Pick a pen and see from where the impulsion to pick comes.
See a bird flying.
See how day changes into night.
See how a thought arises in the mind.
How a bird flies by flapping its wings.
How a fan moves when you ‘on’ the switch.
How a computer obeys your commands.
How you feel when something palatable or unpalatable happens;
This ‘how’ is not a question or explanation. ‘How’ is seeing the propelling force of any micro movement. You see the propelling force when the explanation just stops.
But why this movement?
The question arises as thinking. Thinking itself arises as a movement. You are on the total ground.
Thought gives nourishment to any feeling by labeling it good or bad. Natural sensitivity of body and brain is destroyed by this process. Any feeling arises and withers away automatically.
Any feeling, sensation ends from moment to moment. It has its own expiry. There is renewal every moment. Sensations, which inflate the mind-pleasure, happiness-are labelled as good. Sensations, which deflate the mind-anger, fear, confusion-are labelled as bad. The auto inflationary and deflationary process is obstructed by the labeling.
Whatever ‘what is’ can not be held as satisfactory or unsatisfactory as there is continuous change.
Can you just stop ‘why’ on seeing a favouarable situation, a pleasurable happening, when mind is clamouring for an answer as all answers simply relieve the mind.
It is not the inability to find the answer but seeing that no answer can go further.
Any answer takes one away from facing ‘what is’ ‘as is’. You are on the Original ground.
Your enjoyment is relief from compulsions, relief from uneasy, irritating situations. This pattern becomes one’s bondage. One remains under the illusion as if relief will stabilize one day, some day. Once you notice the bondage, the pattern that you are seeking relief by covering up compulsions, uneasy, irritating feelings-fused state may touch you-fusion of compulsion and relief-the unalloyed enjoyment.
Q. I have done meditation, read spiritual books, read your posts-but the discomfort does not go? It surfaces in one form or the other.
Ans- One essentially feels discomfort when one faces ‘what one does not like’. Labeling it wrong, bad is only a mind game. The discomfort can not be undone or removed from the mind. If discomfort goes, life goes. Once you come to this, can you bear the discomfort and see the emergence of action. The whole energy is here.
Now one understands, sees the whole process-the discomfort stops troubling you. What you want or want to do in any situation becomes clear. You are in the limitless field where nothing stops, nothing stabilizes.
Confusion, fear, anger and so on cause a speed brake in the momentum of thought as
it is not able to act in the old way, stereotyped way. These expressions show
that there is an unbridgeable gap between ‘what is’ and ‘what you think
should be’. It is being comfortable with this gap that supremely relaxes you.
It is your attunement to all possibilities.
You are so much relieved, satisfied and want to remain satisfied, relieved that you convert all ideas about God, Enlightenment, liberation into relief seeking, satisfaction seeking process. Truth does not let you be satisfied with anything, any possession, any relation, any idea, any philosophy, any situation. Now you can operate in the world as you want from moment to moment. All your actions are energy driven and not dulled by comforting ideas, solaces, consolations.
Should not we have faith in God?
Just see-You will always want that what you like should happen. You can not wish against yourself. What you want and what happens is a continuous process. This contrast can not end. Once you see this-you become the creative impulse of the Universe.
The issue of faith means-things can happen against your wish and God and so on should correct such happenings. You become bound by your thinking as you have yourself defined your contrast.
You are not observing life. You are busy in seeking relief by putting the things as good-bad, by your religious-spiritual ideas about life, by condemning, by justifying. Your interest in this relief makes all your activities superficial, your enjoyment is vitiated. You miss the touch of the Original.