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17 Jan 63 John Halifax Mother ______________________________________________________________________________________________

Halifax N.S.

January 17th /63

My dear Mother

Patience to a certain extent I have been called upon to exercise, but it has been under very favourable circumstances.

It is now seven weeks since – well, since I became engaged, and the old gentleman, barring his having expressed his decided disapproval, and at the same time desired Mrs Hill* still to be civil to me, has given no further sign of knowledge of my existence.

Sir J Inglis’ brother is supposed to be making enquiries about me, and next mail will bring some answer from him, beyond the congratulations that came from his family by the last. Then the matter will be brought before Mr Collins again and I suppose he will then have to say something. We all fear it will be a decided veto – why? I don’t know, except that he acts differently to any other person, and as they don’t seem to consider me ineligible he of course does. Should he put a decided prohibition on our meeting, I don’t think Halifax will know me for much longer but I shall turn homewards soon. As long as I can stay and see Frances, I don’t think I can tear myself away.

This all no doubt sounds very foolish, and no doubt I in my calmer moments might think so too, but circumstances alter us all.

And now, my dear Mother, let me do what I ought to have begun my letter by doing – thank you very very heartily for the kind, loving way in which you and my Father have received my news. I cannot tell you how pleased I was to receive your cordial approval. I knew that later when you came to know Frances, you would fully endorse all I have said of her, but I could scarcely have expected that both you and my Father would feel so warmly towards one who is still a stranger to you.

Frances will of course write in answer to you by this mail. She, to the last, not knowing you and fearing I might be disappointed, protested that she did not expect you would write, as you might not be as well pleased as I was at the way in which matters were kept, and she further assures me that on first receiving your letter, her greatest pleasure was that I was not disappointed. She is deeply gratified at the kindness of your note and your thoughts of her and with the pretty present you sent, as well as with the kind messages my Father sends in his letter. I feel that all your congratulations are thoroughly deserved which makes me so happy.

I do indeed so wish that I could bring her to you. I can only repeat that she is thoroughly after your own heart as well as being thoroughly after mine. Day by day, she becomes to me more and more loveable. I do so dread the thought the I may have to leave her. For some time we maintained the fiction that we were not engaged – to the general public at least – but at a dance few days ago, in fact the night the last mail left, a locket Frances gave me flew open and her portrait and lock of hair flew out. This I did not discover and returning to the room after putting some ladies into their carriage, I saw two of the young ladies of the house rush up to their brother with a small picture. I recognised it and before, as I thought, they had time to recognise it, I very rudely no doubt, made a grab and said ‘that is mine’, and then put to put a bold face on the matter said I had lost the hair.

Would you believe it, Frances and Mrs Hill had taken a dislike to the photograph the jeweller had put in and had changed it & the rejected one had got in, probably behind the hair. This was found altho’ the lock was not. It was easily recognised. The former one was remembered and the story, with plenty of additions, is all over the town. So much for our secret.

However it did not much matter for really we have almost given the idea up. I appear in public with them, not rushing into the presence of the old gentleman but at any rate without attempting to conceal matters. This evening I was at a concert, nothing very grand as far as it went, but as I shewed as one of their party to me it was momentous and important as being my first really public appearance with Frances and so far a public confession.

January 20th

I have just returned from a dinner party at the Hills’ and obtained from Frances your letter to her as I thought there might be much in it that I should be glad to see when writing but cannot thank you sufficiently for all you have said to her, for your kindness and sentiments. Frances indeed deserves it all, but you have given me credit for far more than I deserve. Frances also is quite inclined to do that and so I crave you both to stop or you will end in making me believe it all and thereupon get conceited. My heart is too full to write. I must stop.

January 22nd

I am rather amused at dating a letter today as I had marked it black in the Almanac as the day when I expected to leave. I hope you feel the compliment of my marking the day black when I intended to start for home, but under the circumstances I am sure you will not find great fault with me.

Frances has read me (or rather made me read) the letter that she has written to you. I am rather amused at the address Gorse Brook, without even Halifax appended. Mr Collins lives in the best house about Halifax, just out of town, with charming gardens round. Of course I have never seen the inside nor does anybody. As I told you before, I have always met Frances at her sister’s who I like more than ever. Brenton Collins too, Fr’s brother, has been very kind and is a nice fellow altho’ few know him, as he is reserved.

Your letters of January 5th came yesterday. As one of them, I indeed rejoiced to find that you are happy in your children but I cannot take credit for much desert. With example, advice and encouragement, we have been indeed blessed and I am sure I may say that as far as in our power lies, we shall not do anything to cause you or my Father anxiety or pain. For my part, my aim in life has so far been to be a credit to you and then I know to afford you gratification. No success that I have ever obtained but I have chiefly looked forward to the pleasure that you and my Father would have in it and I well know that in no other way can I ever shew what I feel and what I am to you and my Father. My kindest friends always, as well as my nearest relations.

Even now, my greatest pain in parting with Frances, if home I must go, is that you do not know the wife of my choice, and therefore cannot enter fully into my loving her as well as love her yourselves. I am sorry I cannot relieve your uncertainty but I still know nothing about my staying or going. In one thing however I can be certain if I return to the College in May. Frances will stay here. She could not well leave her Father alone and so I suppose then patience would be the order of the day. But if I can stay and through the Colonial Legislature I yet may be retained, matters will be probably different.

Should Mr Collins prove very refractory, I shall strike across the Atlantic without further ado, and I fear we must bring matters to a head soon, even at the risk of having a veto put on our meetings, as the old gentleman will probably hear the locket story, as I did last night at a party, and I think the subject had better come broached by his own family than by a stranger.

Lord M has received no official communication about me. Until he does, I cannot stir.

How do you like the apples. I see incidentally by your saying that you have given some away that you have received them. But how they came, in what order &c. you don’t touch upon. I wrote to Lylie with my news and had a long letter of congratulations from her. I told her not to mention it farther. As I fear I am in for a long engagement I think you had better not mention it farther. Enough is sure to creep out without being talked about.

I have written to Julius on the subject and you can hint the matter to Peter to whom I will write when I have time. I don’t know whether it is wise to trouble Arthur about the matter. You might give him a hint and if I have time and think better of it I can let him know.

I have no time for Mr West by this mail. Bravo! Cecelia Cattley.

I am afraid my letter is too much about ‘Frances’, not ‘Fanny’. Neither she not I like it but horror of horrors, she has taken a fancy to Wimburn. Can I stand that. I told her I preferred being called by the name you all know me by, and so I am occasionally to be treated to each. I fear I must leave Halifax for a fortnight on duty, a terrible time.

My best love and good wishes to you all. Tell Alfred I will write as soon as I get time & believe me with love

Ever your affectionate Son

J Wimburn Laurie

Sorry to hear from Alfred’s letters that you were poorly, but you are well over it. Am glad to hear from my Father himself as well as Alfred that he is better.

The photos were appreciated. Thanks for your enclosure and kindness. I cannot say that too often. Tell me what apples like those I sent could be bought per barrel for, in London.

* Mrs Hill – Margaretta, one of Frances’ sisters, married to Hon. Philip Carteret Hill, mayor of Halifax 1861-64 and premier of Nova Scotia 1875-78

Frances’ father, Enos Collins, ‘the old gentleman’ seems to have given her his permission to marry. Perhaps it was Brenton Collins’ agreement to live with his father at Gorse Brook in place of Frances that persuaded him. Enos Collins died 18^th November 1871