Germanic Youth (born 16 March 2000) is a Dutch former rugby union footballer. He played as a fullback for the Ancient Megapowers, and was a major player in the Great Fullback Crisis of 2017.
Full Name Germanic Youth
Date of Birth 16 March 2000
Place of Birth Hercynian Forest, Germany
Height 1.72m
Weight 55kg
School Rudolph Steiner School, Frankfurt
Rugby union career
Position(s) Fullback
Club
Years 2017-2017 Ancient Megapowers
Apps 10 Points 0
National
Apps 0
Germanic Youth spent the majority of his childhood in the canopies of the Hercynian Forest, clambering down to head to school 3 days a week - or whenever he felt like it really, because that's the Steiner ethos for fuck's sake. A victim of that horrendous system, Germanic Youth developed a penchant for exploration, and at the age of 17 travelled to the Teutoberg Forest on a pilgrimage of sorts. From there he headed down to Italy, the promised land, where nobody worked hard and got fat on a carb-only diet.
Recruited by Pompey for his natural athleticism and naivety to work for little pay, Germanic Youth initially impressed at the club. However, after a few matches his inconsistencies started to show, and he garnered a reputation for being destroyed by hand-off or missing tackles entirely. It was around this time that the Great Fullback Crisis of 2017 is said to have been rampant, and Germanic Youth a propagator of it.
After only 10 matches he was cast out onto the streets once more with no money and no life skills. Rumour has it he moved to Australia and changed his name to Jared, but there is no actual proof of this yet.