Our ignorance is there power shirt
But it is not because they care what is happening to you, or love you a bit after all. Ideally, they will see that you are struggling without them, still pining for them, and still confused and upset. That strokes the narc ego, and that is what is most important to them, the ego. You were once their possession, fully under their control, and even if they dumped you, they want to know they could still have you if they wanted. If you walked away from them, it is trickier for them, because that was a blow to the ego, and they need to be able to tell themselves that, notwithstanding, you still pine. So they keep tabs on you- if not directly, through their flying monkeys. Mine still tries, even though we split up decades ago- but I am hyper-vigilant, have maximum privacy settings on all social media, never befriend anyone I don’t know (they use false names a lot), and have blocked him everywhere. I don’t want him to know anything about my life, even though it is happy and settled.
