SCRIPT 9 EPISODE 9

'THE WITCHES BROOD (aka - Annie's boys/Witches Brew)

AUDIO CLICK HERE https://www.mixcloud.com/LargeAcresTriangle/large-acres-triangle-episode-9/

THE INTRODUCTION

Ernie. 'Old Billy remembers the shambles at the local elections, and the things that never were, promised as forthcoming new ventures, just faded away. They say a lot, pretend a lot, but more than half of them are against change, and they are the ones that get their way he said, which figures.'

Maureen. 'I met Freda the other day in Bognor, and she said there's no way she'd ever live in Hellsey. She did a day visit and bumped into one person in the Hight Street, the rest of it was like a ghost town. She said she's seen more people in the morgue, and they looked livelier than anyone in Hellsey.'

Ernie. 'Well, the only thing that prospers in Hellsey is the Holiday Camp. The guy in charge has one plan only, and that is to build his own empire and village completely independent of the Hellsey folk, and the council knows it but don't let on, he's got too much power and influence.... and he's got 'em scared.'

Maureen. 'Yes, I've noticed that, Ernie. Hellsey's a village pretending to be a town, and it's not really interested in change. There's a bunch of people who are intent on keeping things just the way they are.'

Ernie. 'Whatever happened to that guy 'Sneaky Pete' the brown-noser of that science stargazer stuff, the two-faced one who couldn't tell the truth even if it came up and bit him in the ass!'

Maureen. 'Oh yes, I know who you mean, he lives in Hellsey somewhere not far from the beach, a right arse by all accounts...ooh, do pardon my French, Ernie.'

Ernie. 'Yes, you've got it, one of Hellsey's finest! but don't go expecting him to be your friend, he can lie to your face without blinking an eye.'

Maureen. 'Hellsey's full of them, Ernie, it's best to give them a wide birth, and pretend you haven't seen them.'

Ernie. 'Too right, Maureen, a little bit like an ill wind, nothin' good comes of letting them into your life, they're too busy plotting how to use you, and boy will they abuse you too!'

Maureen. 'I'm luckier than you, Ernie, I live outside the village with just a couple of friends, but even with them I keep it to small stuff, it's safer that way.'

Ernie. 'You're so right, Maureen, it's best to keep your enemies close, and your friends at a distance.'

Maureen. 'Oh, I was going to ask you about something that crossed my mind the other day, Ernie. Have you identified some of the supporters of the Triangle in Large Acres?'

Ernie. 'Yes, you mean the co-conspirators or the folk who are accessories, aid and abet these wicked evil-doers in the name of friendship and misplaced loyalty, which of course...can be bought!'

Maureen. 'Well, something like that, Ernie, I tend to think it's a bit of both, but I do know they're there.'

Ernie. 'There's at least a couple of houses and one bungalow involved at the north-eastern end of the Acres. There's definitely one in the top row, one house from the left starting from the right side...could be 35, but can't be sure right now. What they do and how much they participate remains to be revealed, but sooner or later they will show their hand, especially now we're on the Interweb with a site.'

Maureen. 'Oh yes, I'd nearly forgotten about that, they tried to stop us before, so I guess they'll have another go in stopping the truth from coming out.'

Ernie. 'Yes, they will old girl, and it won't be long before we have them too. They'll trip up sooner or later, and it's only a matter of time.'

Maureen. 'And what of the case this month, Ernie, the one on Wicked Witch Annie? Does it concern the do-gooders, the ones with that po-faced transport man who considers himself more important than anyone else in Hellsey?'

Ernie. 'Ah yes, you've got me there, Maureen, I suppose in a roundabout way the misery guts know-it-all transport man is remotely connected.'

Maureen. 'Yes, I've seen him about in the village, he thinks he's doing the community a big favour, but many of us know he's using it all for his own ego really.'

Ernie. 'It's not all that surprising around here, Maureen, but it's time to look at the case of Wicked Witch Annie and the 'Pied Piper' spell she has over certain kids in these parts, and none of 'em are related to her in the slightest, and therein lies the real mystery of what and why?'

Maureen. 'Ooh yes, do tell me all, Ernie, I've been patiently waiting to know more about this for some while now, and I need to hear it even if I'm not going to like any of it.'

Ernie. 'It's all been very furtive, Maureen, and by all accounts it's been going on for the last five years or so. What seems innocent to some can certainly look different if you give it a second look, and it really does require further scrutiny.'

Maureen. 'Well, Ernie, I know it's not getting any better, no, it isn't. Madge saw around six children all of them quite young, running away from the vicinity of Witch Annie's place, and that caught her eye as being unusual and not what she expected.'

Ernie. 'Not for her, Maureen, but there has been similar incidents in the past few years, and that only adds to the mystery surrounding the Witch Annie. Especially as she has her own gran kids --- a boy, Maureen!'

Maureen. 'Yes, I recall that, but what happened next when those kids ran off was the appearance of guess who?.........The one kid she shows great interest in, and that's amazing timing isn't it, Ernie? They go, and a minute later he's going up to Witch Annie's place.'

Ernie. 'I keep on wondering why this woman hasn't had any CRB checks, the usual stuff to protect the so-called safety of children, but there again, in Hellsey it might only be for the outsiders.'

Maureen. 'Well, he's not her kid, and there's no chance he's related, Ernie, and he's a minor too, and that's rather worrying as I've said before.'

Ernie. 'It's all escalated now, Maureen, it used to be very occasional when it all started, in fact rare really, but then she had her grandson, so I guess her needs were satisfied.'

Maureen. 'Does she see him much these days?'

Ernie. 'No, Maureen, he's a lot bigger now, and he's not the Piper's favourite tune, and in my opinion, he's been replaced.'

Maureen. 'Oh, I see, so what's the situation now, and what's the Witch Annie up to?'

Ernie. 'Well, that's the mystery part. I will always remember that scene when she slipped the kid a fiver, and he was little then, and she looked around to see if anyone had seen it.'

Maureen. 'Ooh I say, that must have looked very suspicious, Ernie, I would have questioned that straight away.'

Ernie. 'Oh no, Maureen, you can't question any of the Large Acres Triangle, they'd stick together and swear blind that it never happened, and there's nothing going on sort of thing.'

Maureen. 'Yes, you're right, Ernie, but it still doesn't answer what the Witch is up to and why.'

Ernie. 'Over the years it moved up to gifts, car rides and who knows what? her interest in him only grows, and it's becoming daily, and he's a minor who could easily be groomed.'

Maureen. 'I've heard about that, and there's a lot of it on this Internet thing. It's not natural for this woman to take such an interest in someone else's kid, or even kids maybe!'

Ernie. 'Not really, Maureen, the Witch has them mesmerised. I guess, or as you would say, Witchcraft. and a bit of that Pied Piper thing.....what's the price, and who is paying?'

Maureen. 'Well, the kids you see these days don't do anything for nothing, Ernie, they always want something in return.'

Ernie. 'Too right, Maureen, Witch Annie might seem okay to the Large Acres lot, but we're going to keep on following her no matter what spells she tries to cast or broomstick she flies on.'

Maureen. 'Yes, Ernie, there's something going on, she's far too close to that kid for his own good... never mind hers, and sooner or later it will all come out.'

Ernie. 'Indeed it will, Maureen, but in the meantime it will have to be filed as a work in progress, and something we will have to close later.'

Maureen. 'Yes, I suppose so, but seeing as we've been talking about boys and Witch Annie, what about...'

Ernie. 'Scumdrum, the humdrum no-hoper drum kid?'

Maureen. 'Well, not especially, Ernie, I was thinking more about the all night pc kid of Fatman Captain Nelson.'

Ernie. 'I guess he's still trawling the porn sites and talking to radicals via those chat rooms you hear about...social network stuff and the dark web. Texting people and all that, well into the early morning most nights.'

Maureen. 'So, no change there.... these kids in Hellsey can do as they like.'

Ernie. 'With the parents they've got there won't be any changes. They don't really care what their kids do, you've only to see Poser Prince Will Hyams and what he does for the young tartlet, money's no object.'

Maureen. 'I think the Poser Prince and Captain Nelson are well suited as friends. If Will Hyams needed a brain transplant, he's better to choose Fatman Nelson because he'd want a brain that had never been used before.'

Ernie. 'And talking about the Fatman, I guess he's going to have to find another bent solicitor, Hellsey has just lost one lot, three of them all in one practice on the money fiddle, but there's still two other firms, so I guess he's in with a chance.'

Maureen. 'Ooh yes, that was all over the news, Ernie, but I recall a year or two back that their premises were closed suddenly for a day.....Gone to Court or something.'

Ernie. 'Yes, it was, at least two years ago, so there's a time gap, and they were still operating a business, and time-wise things don't actually add up at all.'

Maureen. 'Well, that's Hellsey isn't it? one mystery after another, and nobody's saying.'

Ernie. 'Yep, we're going to be busy for a long time in these parts, just you and me taking on the nastiest critters you could ever encounter.'

Maureen. 'I'll be off in a minute or so, Ernie, so do you fancy hearing a joke before I go?'

Ernie. 'Yes, I'm up for that, let's hear it.'

Maureen. 'If God created us in his own image, what went wrong with Captain Nelson?'

Ernie. 'Plenty I guess, Maureen, but do tell me.'

Maureen. 'Nobody knows, Ernie, he should have gone to spec savers.'

Ernie. 'Not bad, Maureen, I did expect more.'

Maureen. 'Well, I tried, but talking about more, what have we got next?'

Ernie. 'Much ado about something, Maureen, we're taking a wider look at Hellsey and the Large Acres in cahoots!'

Maureen. 'Mmm, that sounds interesting. I'll be thinking about that on my way home, so I'll take the tea things through to the kitchen on my way out.'

Ernie. 'Oh, that's good of you, old girl. it's getting a bit cluttered on this table.'

Maureen. 'No problem, Ernie, I'll give you a call if anything comes up.'

Ernie. 'Keep your eyes peeled and take care on your way home, and don't talk to strange men...or Witches!'

Maureen. 'Ooh No, Ernie, there's enough strange out there for me, Bye bye.'

Ernie. 'Bye,....see you later!'

Fade....and end.