'A ROUGH SEA AHEAD'
Ernie. 'Ah, there you are, Maureen, you're bang on time like usual. I often think I could have no better clock than you!'
Maureen. 'Oh, that's nice, Ernie, but I think that's entirely down to habit really, one that I adopted to in my early working days.'
Ernie. 'Yes, I think there's a lot to be said for organising ones-self. Unfortunately life doesn't quite tie me down to that level, so I'm pleased to have you here.'
Maureen. 'Me too, and I think we get on very well, so what have we got on the menu today?'
Ernie. 'One of our chief rogues, Maureen, it's the Fatman Captain Nelson again, the rising star turn of The Large Acres Triangle, and this could be the big one old girl.'
Maureen. 'Oh my, that sounds interesting, Ernie, just let me pour a tea and then you can fill me in with all the details.'
Ernie. 'I'll do my best as usual, but he hasn't been caught yet, that's the worst part, but he has upped his villainy to new heights and our new case involves his family too, it's a complicated and nasty business, one that I hadn't been expecting.'
Maureen. 'What are we talking about here, Ernie, is it something we already had in the files on the Fatman's activities?'
Ernie. 'Sadly, no, it seems that Captain Nelson has been dipping his toes into the trafficking of people and sex trade. You know, making cash of people's misfortune, a low I never thought I'd see up to now.'
Maureen. 'Oh, Ernie, I've heard something about that from my friend, Vera. She said there was a TV programme on it which revealed that this kind of thing doesn't just happen in the cities or towns, it happens in villages too.'
Ernie. 'Yes, Maureen, and it's happening here in Hellsey, right here in the Triangle, and we've got our own 'Mr Big' -- Fatman Captain Nelson and his family. Plus others I'd guess.'
Maureen. 'Smuggling, VAT fraud, scams, and this. He's reaching out this time, and this has got to be the most loathsome thing he's ever embarked upon in his criminal career!'
Ernie. 'Nothings off the radar to this man, Maureen. We should have seen this coming, and what we need to find out is, how many others are in it around here or helping him conceal this terrible thing. That's our next move.'
Maureen. 'Mind you, before I arrived, I did have something else to begin the show with, and it's related to a sex thing. But that can wait until we've got this, its far more important that we do this on Fatman Captain Nelson, that I'm sure of, so do go on, Ernie, I'm settled now.'
Ernie. 'Thank you, Maureen, yes, we've got to deal with this before anything else.'
Maureen. 'Oh, just before you start, Ernie, are any of the others in the Triangle involved?'
Ernie. 'You'll have to wait and hold your horses old girl, all will be revealed.'
Maureen. 'Ooh sorry, Ernie, do go on, don't mind me.'
Ernie. 'Well, Maureen, I got this note from Harry over at the Tyre place saying he had something for me on Captain Nelson, but couldn't go any further on it on the phone. I asked him if it was urgent, and he more or less indicated I was the one to decide that. So I arranged to meet him in the Traveller's Joy car park at 4 pm and went down to Southbourne a little earlier so we didn't miss each other.'
Maureen. 'Yes, that's good, I would have done that too, Ernie, it sounds very promising.'
Ernie. 'When I arrived I didn't see Harry's car, mind you, these BMW's aren't exactly status symbols are they, they're getting as common as Mercedes. Anyway, getting back to the nitty gritty, I'd only spent about a couple of minutes waiting and he came in.'
Maureen. 'Oh, I'm pleased with that, Ernie, I know how it is when you're waiting for someone to turn up. They don't always come!'
Ernie. 'Yes, I had thought about that too, luckily it didn't happen in this instance. Anyway, we went into the old boozer, got a nice little corner place as far as we could from anyone else there, and what he had to tell me really knocked me back!'
Maureen. 'Ooh, this sounds good, Ernie, do go on.'
Ernie. 'Apparently, Harry was down in the Copnor district having one of his car keys programmed when he suddenly saw Fatman Nelson walk by just outside, and Harry being a staunch Pompey man recognised a prominent Leigh Park villain hanging around, a rather fat guy like the Captain who often deals in drugs, violence, and fencing stuff etc. And in a matter of seconds he sees them both together appearing to look like old buddies!'
Maureen. 'Oh I say,Ernie, this is serious, and its something entirely new for us eh?'
Ernie. 'Indeed it is old girl. Well, Harry being quite an inquisitive guy grabs his key as soon as it's done and goes out to see where they are, because for a minute or so he's been distracted by business so-to-speak. Once he's out he can't see either of them at all, but fate hasn't finished and as Harry goes back to his car, which he managed to park opposite the old lock up, the prison, he sees both of them, and Nelson appears very nervous, and he's got good reason to be too!'
Maureen. 'Why's that, Ernie? what happened.'
Ernie. 'Well, the Leigh Park villain, is now getting into some sort of a camper van that pulled up to collect him, and he passes a rather bulky looking envelope out of the window. Which he thrust into the hands of Captain Nelson, and boy oh boy, does he look embarrassed . He grabs it and hurries off to his white van parked not far from where Harry is. So Harry with the idea of being on a quest and time to spare, follows the fatman north towards Cosham and finally loses him at the A3 turn off to Petersfield and Winchester. And that was that, but he reckons the package was a wad of cash, he said the envelope gave it away!'
Maureen. 'Well, it did, Ernie, no doubt about it, there's something going on there, anyone can see it.'
Ernie. 'Evidently not everyone, Maureen, Hellsey is completely blind to his goings-on. Apparently the older boy, the pc teen is taking a more active role, and they were both seen going off together in that unmarked white van of his out of Hellsey going in a westerly direction.
Maureen. 'And what about the young teen, the schoolie one?'
Ernie. 'What about the young teen you ask, well, sources reveal that he's using the school computer sessions to do the work for the Fatman Nelson, and contacts his dad's Midland's contact from the untraceable widely used computer while his big brother concentrates on the Portsmouth and Winchester links already established. Thus keeping things nicely fragmented for the Captain, and not easy to follow by the interested authorities.'
Maureen. 'My, my, talk about friends and family. Captain Nelson doesn't seem to mind who he uses in these scams!'
Ernie. 'Well that's the thing, Maureen, his scams are on the increase, and its now obvious to me that he can't stop.'
Maureen. 'Oh, I agree with you there, Ernie, the Fatman wants money and power, you can see that.'
Ernie. 'The Fatman Nelson van disappears into the night on many occasions, regularly near midnight. Even Witch Annie's car has been seen going out shortly after. A sharp-eyed witness saw both vehicles stopping alongside each other on the lay-by just a way along from the new supermarket. They wound down their windows to engage in a conversation, I'd have liked to have heard that!'
Maureen. 'Me too, Ernie, a fly on the wall thing eh?'
Ernie. 'Yes, Maureen, anyway, the Fatman does a detour in order to throw off the car following him, which of course, was our eagle-eyed witness.'
Maureen. 'Oh dear, that's a nuisance, Ernie, just when he might have been into something good.'
Ernie. 'Well, we're not entirely lost there, Maureen, he has seen the Captain going off into the holiday camp late at night a few times, and he reckons he's gone to meet someone. So this could easily be someone involved in this latest venture, and it might tie in with the mystery of what's he putting into his garage late at night!'
Maureen. 'Yes, I've been wondering about that, didn't you once say he had these outside lights flashing on and off all night?'
Ernie. 'Oh that, yes, security lights. It's the Fatman's early warning system over the garages which come on if anyone comes too near, such as the cops or one of those others out to nick him. Mind you, that reminds me of one particular night when he was waiting for someone. Instead of going into the house, Fatman Nelson goes to one of the garages, probably laden with goods, and funnily enough, the lights have been turned off!'
Maureen. Oh my, What's going on, Ernie, what's he doing?'
Ernie. 'You may well ask, because a car mysteriously draws up near the Nelson's house, and a man furtively approaches the Fatman's place looking around at the other houses, especially the newcomer's house, has he been warned about it?'
Maureen. 'Ooh, I don't know, Ernie, has he?'
Ernie. 'That wasn't a question, Maureen, it just added to the dramatics. Anyway, the time is 12.12pm, just gone midnight and Captain Nelson peers around as he takes this stranger into one of his garages. The garage door is lifted quickly and then brought down as they both disappear inside, and nothing stirs for about ten minutes. Then, they both come out and the man quickly goes back to his car, and with not a word between them, it disappears out of the Acres as silently as it arrived.'
Maureen. 'I wonder what they were up to, and what followed next, Ernie?'
Ernie. 'Well, the Fatman Captain Nelson casually looks around as he goes back into the house to converse with his wife, who I may add, has been sat watching from the convenience of their extended porch.'
Maureen. 'Yes, I've heard she does that quite frequently.'
Ernie. 'Five minutes later, the blinds are drawn and the Fatman's house embraces the darkness, albeit for the teenage son who is still at the pc doing his usual surfing on the sites for daddy and the scam besides all this media stuff and chat rooms. It's a family thing at the Nelson's place, and the Fatman's family are united in anything they do, even Triangle business!'
Maureen. 'That's to be expected, Ernie, they're as thick as thieves. So what else do we know, is that it?'
Ernie. 'Almost old girl, but I did get a call from Harry this morning. He said he'd heard from a friend in the local fuzz, cops to you and me, Maureen, that the Leigh Park guy who was with the Fatman Nelson is now into the sex trade and people thing, using them to make money. So I guess the local CID are watching him and Captain Nelson.'
Maureen. 'Ooh it's awful, Ernie, you can't trust anybody, this nation is getting more corrupt than ever before, especially here in the Triangle, and Hellsey of course.'
Ernie. 'Undoubtedly, Maureen, and we'll keep an eye on the situation. So what else have we got from you?'
Maureen. 'Not a lot, Ernie, there's a couple of things bubbling around in Hellsey, but I need more on it, so we'll see how it pans out. Ooh I say, pans out! that's modernistic isn't it?'
Ernie. 'Yes, not bad old girl, so what was this other thing you've got?'
Maureen. 'Oh, it was another one of those sex offender things, child stuff again in this area, Chichester of all places? The man's gone to jail, so it's one less, I think they called him Stuart Kirk.'
Ernie. 'There's quite a little club around here, that must be the fifth one we've mentioned so far. So what about one of your jokes, we're almost running out of time, this Fatman scam has almost filled the show.'
Maureen. 'Yes, it has, and I'm sure we had more!'
Ernie. 'We do, but they can be in the next episode, so let's hear the joke before the credits begin to roll and our music outro plays!'
Maureen. 'Well, here it goes, 'the round round Robin comes bob bob bobbing along, the round round Robin can't go bob bob bobbing, its gone, Cuckoo, Cuckoo!'
Ernie. ' Ah yes, quite inventive, Maureen, the Fat Interloper has arrived, just as it does all too frequently in the Large Acres Triangle. Sadly we can't go into Wicked Witch Annie and the others this time!'
Maureen. 'No, Ernie, and it's time I was making my way home, so I'll see you soon.'
Ernie. 'Yes old girl, in Episode 18, so take care and mind how you go, I need you back here as usual.'
Maureen. 'Well, Bye for now, Ernie, bye bye.'
Ernie. 'Yes, Bye Bye.
THE END.