Erasing More Than Lines
The Idea
This idea was almost completely based on the thought that I wanted to use pencil to scribble-sketch again. It's an old way of sketching I used to use a lot, where I just scribble all over the paper without thinking and then pick out lines that create things—usually mermaids because feet-shaped lines don't form as easily as tails do. I trace the lines making up those shapes with pencil to make them darker, and then in the past I erased the lines I didn't use and color the drawing I'm left with.
But this time I didn't want to erase the lines.
The idea behind this piece came bit by bit, and random things kept happening in my life during the weeks that added another meaning behind this piece. A girl sitting near me in a class was telling her friend about how she had broken up with her boyfriend and had gone through her Instagram to delete all the photos of him. And I thought, why would you delete something like that? Why do we try to erase pieces of the past that we don't like or no longer "matter" to us?
That's when I realized just how closely this piece is tied to my mini-series and the idea that we have to look back to move forward. If we keep erasing what's behind us, how will we ever create anything new? How will we learn from our experiences and connections and mistakes? I strongly believe that everything in our lives impacts us in some way, and we shouldn't try to pretend things in our past haven't happened. Sure, if you committed a crime or something and would rather everyone forget about that, I think that's fair for the person to want that. But isn't that an opportunity to prove that they're a better person now than the person that committed the crime? We need our pasts to improve, so we shouldn't try to erase the past.
A close-up of the "middle" of the piece. The whole thing is eighteen by twenty-four inches (18''x24'') and done almost entirely in pencil. It's the first piece I've needed to spray with crystal clear finish in a really long time. Pen/ink work was definitely my main medium for a while.
A few of my sketchbook pages where I "practiced" and played around with lines. See—mostly merfolk end up being drawn. (Don't get me wrong; I love drawing merfolk.)
I usually end up with wacky hair styles and hats, since I have absolutely no idea how anything is going to end up anywhere. I just trace the lines that I see and go from there. Sometimes I like what I end up with and sometimes I wish I would have used the line just next to the one I chose to use.
I tried playing around with words, even though I detest words because my mind doesn't think in words like it thinks in pictures.
The Process
I still wanted to use myself in the piece, but I didn't want to compromise the lack of planning this piece needed. In no way was I about to try and plan the randomness of the scribbles, but I found a way to keep the piece like it was meant to be.
I didn't erase anything but streaks through the people in the "background" to show how painful the erasing can be if you decide to erase that way. My hand smeared pencil and turned the paper gray, so the streaks are all the more obvious.
The piece is meant to be viewed in person. I told everyone in my class to come closer and look at the piece up close and personal (during the critique in class) because I wanted everyone to see the lines that they needed to look between. It was fun hearing people start randomly exclaiming, "IS THAT A WHALE?!" "Oh my gosh, the MERMAIDS!" "The erased lines hurt; why you do this."