I could never linger on the breeze

Por Julia Rockel Amarilha

Enviado em: 04/12/2025

Parágrafo de contexto: I wrote this poem as an evaluative activity for the course of Poetry, in professor Elton's class. I tried to express a feeling of uncertainty and not really knowing what makes you yourself, which is something I kind of struggle with sometimes. I’m not sure if that is clear but I really tried. In the title I tried to do something better than just one word like “nothing” or “vapors” or “being”. The idea behind it is that the narrator is so fragile that even standing on the breeze carries them away. I think that’s it, I hope you like it!

I am not mine

My ego, my self, avoids me

Escapes me at a sleight of hand

Who knows me to be me?

Here's what I know: I fail to exist.

I’m certain the world simply imagined me

And now, from a host and into another 

I fall — a parasite, no more

Uncertain, slipping through the wind — lacking

The substance of the bones.

The me I am is not enough

To cover my own depths

My intangible existence — 

nonetheless — Speaks loudly

From a throat made of nothing.

I say again and again:

I fail to exist, constantly

After all, isn’t reality only that which endures?

This little, unrelenting rock, that stays

And builds, and creates, and is life itself,

Making difference between what there is

And what simply has been done — 

moment and eternity — I believe in this,

And say: every passing moment

I lose myself trying to be someone.

I am not enduring, nor fixed — or even firm

I am like the desert sands on the breeze

I shatter and roll and evaporate — never being

I am not mine: I am not. 

I have been done, and that is all.