Debts

Handicaps

Autism

Let's start with the most expensive one: my autism. I will not go into major detail about everything that my autism is causing, but I do know I need daily help for about 16 hours per day to curb its negative effects.

Because the healthcare budgets came too late (if any) and what is currently available is restricted to what I'm allowed to be spending it on because what I need help with is medical-scientifically proven but bureaucratically denied. Simply put, I am prevented from making use of this personalized healthcare budget.

However, my autism needs help daily, so I'm forced to hire a VA to help me out. As a VA is not tied to any kind of rules or allegiance, they are extremely flexible and very eager to help me with whatever it is that I need. This does come at a cost of around €200 per month. To put this in context, that's 20% of my income that I have to sacrifice from my secondary needs.

Over the past 10 years, the costs have mounted, and as of Q1 2021, I had to spend over €15.000 on this.

Migraines

I should make a side note that about 40% of the €15.000 can be contributed to curbing my migraines when I was bedridden for 1.5 years and then another two years of rehabilitation.

PTSD

Following on from autism and migraines, we arrive at the most expensive handicap. My PTSD. Having been made homeless by Woonzorgnet and the Municipality of Arnhem has entirely shattered my sanity and caused me personal injury. The ripple-effects are so great that, up to this point, it is still unclear how pricy exactly it is.

But what I do know, and what is definitely the biggest expense, as well as an ongoing expense, is a 28-year-old camper with, as it turns out, hidden defects. I will spare you the details, but the camper had a price of €5.500 euros, and I had to spend another €500 for immediate repairs.

Luckily, I have a dad that is currently coughing up the ongoing expenses, but technically this is debt to my dad. Since August 1, 2019, I've been paying around €115 per month. As I'm writing this in March 2021 (20 months later), I would be looking at a debt of €2.300.

And you might be thinking, well, why not sell the camper? The issue is that PTSD prevents that from happening as I require a backup roof over my head in case things go wrong.

And why do I think that things go wrong? I am currently officially in breach of agreement with my social housing landlord. Where I live, I need to have a social worker attached to me. The problem is, a social worker that I already knew for 3 years (he was way before I got homeless and was in my life for about 2 hours per week) turned on me and blackmailed me to become obedient.

This "obedience" was signing my own death warrant in the Netherlands, which means I would declare myself unable to make my own decisions (Dutch: "handelingsonbekwaam"). You can imagine that no sensible person would ever weaken their own rights.

So because of this, I still see my social house lord as an immediate threat to my primary needs because, from a legal perspective, they can evict me, and if I don't have my camper, I will then be homeless again. Even though they know it's not my fault and I've been blackmailed, apparently for the legal system, it doesn't matter that I find super injustice.

And to have at least a little bit of peace of mind, I will not sell my camper until I have a safe, guaranteed back-up roof available to me.

Entrepreneurship

And finally, I've tried to be an entrepreneur, and since I had no formal education, I made a lot of rookie mistakes. But being an entrepreneur also comes with a little bit of investing in software tools that will help you stay organized and structured.

Especially because entrepreneurship is kind of like the wild west, you need this in order to survive.

So I had 3 endeavors, and unfortunately, none of them made me any money (so far). These are:

• Ferione (Music Producer) owes €6000

• Firespace (Record Label) owes €3000

• Preptalk (Video content creation channel) owes €250

You might be thinking, why are you going into entrepreneurship so unprepared? Why not find a regular job? Well, people with a handicap like mine are not recruited. I face a serious stigma from employers, and the fact that there is no help available for me does not encourage anybody to give me a chance.

On top of that, my handicaps, especially when I get migraines, disable me permanently from working in a regular job because consistency is required and I can not adhere to the schedules of a company or my boss.

I also received no labor reintegration help from the unemployment agency because of backward laws. Because I still want to do something with my life, the only way forward is entrepreneurship.