The Duties
1. Vis - Tournament Director (The TD): He was born for this and it now has consumed him entirely. Final authority on all rulings, movie choices, new handicap rules, and inter-tournament skirmishes. FYMA is not a democracy. TD’s rulings are final.

2. Mudro - Assistant TD (The AssTD):  Before you storm the Tournament Director (TD) with any complaints, grievances, or general whining, pause. All issues must 1st pass AssTD review. AssTD will then decide whether your complaint is worthy of his precious time or if it’s just douchebaggery. You’ll probably be told to just deal with it. When he’s not being the Grievance Gatekeeper, AssTD is also the tech guru handling the website and collecting all travel times. Got apparel requests? Need a shirt, a Scally, or maybe a banana hammock? Let him know ASAP, because he has the ultimate power to approve, deny, or charge you based on his whims. Oh, and he also handles the pairings for the week. Yes, those too will be subject to the almighty approval of the TD.

3. G - Tourney Official and Time Keeper: G-Money ensures Handicap Verifications and Adjustments. Rechecks AssTD’s handicaps and make sure Fratt gets thoroughly screwed over—in the most fair and ethical way possible, of course. On Saturday and Sunday nights, you may have the golden opportunity to bribe G-money. However, be warned: All bribe amounts must be pre-approved by the TD, and 20% of the bribe goes straight into the TD’s pocket (for "administrative purposes"). G-money will also be in charge of validating and posting scores and updating the leaderboard nightly—so if you get screwed on your handicap, blame him, not AssTD. As the Official Time Keeper, it’s his sacred duty to make sure all players are up and ready to roll for their tee times. Think of G as the world’s least appreciated alarm clock. No snooze buttons are allowed.

4. Chaser or Chaz – Planning Officer & Movie Coordinator (The POM): Movie Coordinator: His mission, should he choose to accept it, is to make sure movie listings are posted by 7:00 PM sharp each evening. As the fearless organizer, The POM automatically get first dibs on the recliners. Feel free to take the best one and claim it as the POM throne, but don't be surprised if people eye it like it’s a parking spot at Costco on Black Friday. As the bouncer, he’ll screen all newcomers at the door. The POM also enforce any rulings made by the TD, which means he gets to be the enforcer and peacemaker all at once. It’s like being a superhero, but with less spandex. Finally, assist in gathering all the “lessons learned” (mostly "don’t do that again") and help plan the next FYMA Cup.

5. Clarkie - Poker Director/Games Coordinator (aka Pitboss): Clarkie is basically the ringmaster of this circus—His main tools? Two sets of poker chips and a deck of cards. If he can’t scrounge up these essentials, don’t worry, he can just beg, borrow, or steal from other Cuppers (preferably not the stealing part, unless it’s really necessary). In addition to overseeing our gambling, the Pitboss is in charge of any side games—because who doesn’t love a good game of "let’s make it up as we go"?  He’ll also be the one making game rulings, which means he gets to play referee. However, remember that the TD holds the ultimate power to decide on any disputes.

6. Rivs - Sommelier & Food Coordinator (aka SomFoo or J-Aloha):  As the Sommelier & Food Coordinator, your first task is to provide a wine list for SuppO to execute—don’t forget the bottle opener! While the house may provide one, always keep one handy on your Tilted Kilt charm necklace. You never know when you’ll need to uncork greatness. In addition, J-Aloha will be filling the role of Food Director. he'll ensure all food lists are crafted based on the menu planning of each cooking group. With Rivs in charge of both, this year should be a breeze—especially when it comes to pairing Merlot with franks & beans. Bon appétit... or whatever you want to call that combo!

7. Fratt – Beverage Czar (except wine). Frattski's first responsibility as the Beverage Czar is to provide SuppO with the most comprehensive beverage list known to humanity—this includes mixers, water, Gatorades, and whatever else you think will keep the masses hydrated and happy. Think of it as a simple shopping spree... but on a grand scale. Don’t forget the Bloody Mary mix—this is not optional. Fratt will also hand-pick the Keg of Local Goodness—because nothing says "classy event" like a keg that could have been brewed by local wizards in a barn somewhere. And, let’s not forget, you are now officially bestowed with the title of Official Mixologist. That’s right, Fratt, you’ve earned the honor of creating the FYMA Cup’s first-ever signature drink. It’ll be legendary, or at least it will make people forget their problems.

8. Chop – SuppO (Supply Overlord):  Once all assignments are handed out, the Directors, Czars, and Coordinators will send their supply lists to Chop—who, unfortunately for him, is now the chosen one for handling it all. Your job? Make sure you send him a supply list so long and complicated that it’ll feel like assembling IKEA furniture in the middle of a hurricane. After all, Chop will be absolutely wrecked during his flight and layovers this year, so the more challenging you make it, the better. The SuppO also has double duty, taking on the esteemed role of Food Assistant. This means he will help oversee the culinary chaos, ensuring that food lists are properly developed based on the brilliant menu planning of each cooking group. Think of it as the ultimate Iron Chef competition, but with more questionable ingredient choices and less skill.

9. Kinger is settling in to his new, highly prestigious role as Charc-O (pronounced “shark-o”), after hosting a weekend of the FYMA - next generation. His sole mission? To ensure that all Cuppers are endlessly supplied with the finest array of cured meats, cheeses, and other accoutrements raffinés (that’s fancy-talk for "stuff that makes you look fancy"). We’re talking top-tier olives, fruits, nuts, jams, and anything else that makes you feel like you’ve been transported to a wine-and-cheese rave. Kinger’s specific requirements are nothing short of perfection: the meats and cheeses must be sliced to a thickness that would make a deli counter jealous, arranged in such aesthetically pleasing patterns that Pinterest would consider hiring him, and garnished with decorative flourishes like herbs, edible flowers, and little fruit confetti. This isn’t just a charcuterie board—it’s a charcuterie masterpiece. And let's not forget the temperature rules: cheeses must be served at room temperature (to unlock their full flavor potential, obviously), and the meats? Properly chilled—because no one wants a sweaty salami. When not executing his Charc-O duties, Kinger will be charged with Fire Marshall duties, which include building a campfire that would make even the proficient Eagle Scout jealous. Fires must be large enough to prevent TD from wanting to snuggle for warmth, but small enough so that Johnny Aloha can tumblesault through. 

10. Espino - Reprotaw Director/Trainer: As the Reprotaw, Spino’s daily duties include the fine art of pairing tobacco and whiskey—because someone has to elevate this experience to its highest, most sophisticated level. His responsibilities include curating daily pairings that will have Cuppers contemplating life’s deeper meanings, all while ensuring a well-stocked supply of cigars and bourbons. He'll serve as the ultimate guide to proper drinking and smoking techniques, dispensing wisdom in the form of educational tidbits like, “Don’t inhale the bourbon” or “Yes, it’s perfectly acceptable to sip your whiskey and savor your cigar in the same breath.” You'll also ensure that the atmosphere is just right—comfortable enough that people can appreciate the delicate balance of a fine cigar and a well-aged bourbon without wondering if the room is too hot, too cold, or too whiskey-scented. This role demands not just a discerning palate, but also a combination of knowledge, experience, and a mystical ability to connect with each Cupper. After all, pairing is about the people—and their ability to appreciate the nuance of what he'll be giving them without accidentally lighting their eyebrows on fire.

11.  Arch - Protocol Officer (aka Po-Po): The Po-Po will be the fearless defender of good manners, impeccable humor, and general etiquette. When someone breaches the sacred laws of politeness (you know, like interrupting someone mid-sentence or asking for ketchup at a fine steak dinner), Arch will be there to swiftly correct them with a well-timed "Excuse me, but that’s not how we behave" in classic Arch-like style.  Arch is also the official repair guru, making sure that any broken items—be it a shattered drywall, a malfunctioning cooler, or the dignity of a wayward Cupper—are fixed before we head out. No one leaves with a lingering problem... unless it’s their questionable fashion choices. And when the inevitable pre- or post-round skirmishes break out, the Po-Po will step in as the peacekeeper, settling disputes with a mix of diplomacy, humor, and the occasional well-placed sarcasm. After all, nothing diffuses tension like a good laugh... or an unexpected round of applause for an impeccable sense of timing.

12.  PK - Random Task at-Large/Karaoke DJ:  The ultimate Jack-of-all-trades, PK’s role as Random Task is to take on whatever random job the TD or AssTD throws his way. From prepping the keg like a true beverage architect to performing sacred rituals in the bathroom (aka the shitter-de-turder), his job is to ensure everything runs smoothly—even if it means diving into the messiest of tasks. He’ll be tasked with the kind of glory no one else wants: arranging seating with the precision of a high-stakes Tetris player, hunting down lost keys and wallets like a seasoned detective, and, in general, making sure that nothing—not even a rogue spoon or misplaced shoe—goes unnoticed. He is the unsung hero of the FYMA Cup, making sure everyone’s in the right place, with the right drink, and fires are optional. He is also in charge of coordinating our evening karaoke escapades and dining excursions, working closely with the Pitboss to ensure that our nights out are filled with just the right amount of debauchery, dining, and — of course — strategic gameplay.