Dr. StrangeGrief

[Hawk Ster calls Señora GlumHide]

Hawk Ster: [to Señora GlumHide] Hello?... Uh... Hello Ha- uh hello GlumHide? Listen uh uh I can't hear too well. Do you suppose you could turn the harrumphing down just a little?... Oh-ho, that's much better... yeah... huh... yes... Fine, I can hear you now, Glum... Clear and plain and coming through fine... I'm coming through fine, too, eh?... Good, then... well, then, as you say, we're both coming through fine... Good... Well, it's good that you're fine and... and I'm fine... I agree with you, it's great to be fine... a-ha-ha-ha-ha... Now then, Señora GlumHide, you know how we've always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the Account Page... The Account Creation Page, GlumHide... The Fake Account Creation Page... Well now, what happened is... ahm... one of our Resident Engineers, he had a sort of... well, he went a little irritated in the hood... you know... just a little... upset. And, ah... he went and did a capricious thing... Well, I'll tell you what he did. He revoked your account registrations...contending that you violated the TOS... Ah... Well, let me finish, GlumHide... Let me finish... Well listen, how do you think I feel about it?... Can you imagine how I feel about it, GlumHide?... Why do you think I'm calling you? Just to say hello?... Of course I like to speak to you!... Of course I like to say hello!... Not now, but anytime, Glum. I'm just calling up to tell you something terrible has happened... It's a friendly call. Of course it's a friendly call... Listen, if it wasn't friendly... you probably wouldn't have even got it... He will not relent for at least another decade... I am... I am positive, Glum... Listen, I've been all over this with Moulton, Gastrin Bombesin, and Toasty T'assi. It is not a remediable condition... Well, I'll tell you. We'd like to give your poison-pen writing staff a complete run-down on the hangups, the narratives, and the griefer defense mechanisms of the Uru Culture... Yes! I mean i-i-i-if we're unable to erase the stigma, then... I'd say that, ah... well, ah... we're just gonna have to help you rehabilitate yourself, Glum... I know you're our favorite griefer... All right, well listen now. Who should we call?... Who should we call, Glum? The... wha-whe, The Fort... you, sorry, you faded away there... The Fortnight Follies Spiritual Epiphany Headquarters... Where is that, GlumHide?... In the Noösphere... Right... Yes... Oh, you'll call them first, will you?... Uh-huh... Listen, do you happen to have the phone number on you, Glum?... Whe-ah, what? I see, just ask for Noösphere Information... Ah-ah-eh-uhm-hm... I'm sorry, too, Señora GlumHide... I'm very sorry... All right, you're sorrier than I am, but I am as sorry as well... I am as sorry as you are, Glum! Don't say that you're more sorry than I am, because I'm capable of being just as sorry as you are... So we're both sorry, all right?... All right.