What I Want

What I really want and need is an Agreeable Partner, who I can have an Honest Deep Connection with. Someone who has Unconditional Grace for me, someone who is Sensitivity Towards My Mental Health Struggles and who will help with my adsent minded professorness and my lack of commen sense.

Chapter 10

Original from January 2022
updated for v6.00333 11/14/22 2236

10) What I Need & Want

Agreeable Partner,

Honest Deep Connection.

Unconditional Grace,

And Sensitivity Towards My Struggles

An Agreeable partner, with an honest deep connection.

I need unconditional grace in the morning.

I need help around the house.

I need help with laundry daily.

I need the girls to do their daily chores such as Amelia emptying the bathroom trash as I have directed her more than 100 times to do. But she still will not do it without being told.

I need the kids to not be allowed to just forget what I tell them to do.

I find that to be an awful excuse.

Yet it seems to work every time for them because I have no authority to back up my rules.

The kids need to either take notes or record when I give them directions and then they need to actually do what I tell them to do.

I want to be the house commander and be treated as such.

If I truly live up to the marine corps leadership traits of integrity and trust, then I am able to lead.

You might need to have faith in my command or else this partnership cannot work.

To name a few other things I want, but don’t absolutely need.

I Want

I want to teach the kids how to play instruments, and about science.

I want to check in on the girls' school work whenever I ask them to, and I don't want them to be allowed to always refuse.

I want Sheila to run to me when I come home.

I always want to leave on good terms.

Always give a hug when saying hello or goodbye.

No blocking my phone number.

Sometimes I may need to call you 10 or 20 times a day to stay in touch and coordinate taking care of business.

Drinking Beer

Drinking beer. We need to talk about this and come to a consensus on this.

I know who I am and what is good for me. I believe that I am an alcoholic, but a sensible one. I can be a responsible beer drinker.

I want to be allowed to drink beer freely at home once a week without being afraid.

Sometimes, I like to drink beer when we are at a social gathering. I understand the complexities of this issue.

Let’s talk about it.

Writing To Each Other

And I want to write to each other more, like we should do a marriage journal or blog together.

And I ask that you give me a response to this letter in writing.

Please write down your reasons to stay married to me.

Write down everything from your perspective about what is wrong and needs to change.

Your reasons for wanting to stay.

List what you like and don’t like about me.

List your boundaries.

Name your wants, needs and deal breakers.

I want to write to each other like we did when we first met. We would pass that notebook back and forth. What happened to that?

Next - Chapter 11: Reasons to Stay

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