In the phone call, Cheng Xu had been in a completely out-of-control state. Even though he said a few words, they were interspersed with sobs and Xu Tangcheng had not heard him clearly at all. He did not obtain any useful information and when he called back many times, no one picked up.

"His surroundings sounded very noisy and there was very loud music." Xu Tangcheng made a guess based on intuition. "And he's drunk. It should be a club."

But there were so many clubs in Beijing. Which one would Cheng Xu be at?

Three in the morning. The two of them drove around the streets of Beijing, failing to find a single clue. Xu Tangcheng guessed that the only thing that could cause Cheng Xu to break down was Fu Daiqing but he wasn't really acquainted with the man, nor did he have any way to contact him. He even—he was finally realising now—could not think of any one who was close to Cheng Xu and might know where he was.

He couldn't contact Cheng Xu, so they could only try their luck and search around.

"Drive towards Workers' Stadium for now, there are a lot of clubs there." His brows furrowed, Xu Tangcheng opened the contacts list in his phone, ready to ask his friends who frequented clubs.

"Ask Zheng Yikun," Yi Zhe suddenly said while driving.

He knew that Zheng Yikun spent a crazy amount of time in clubs and at his most manic period, he could spend five nights a week in different clubs. He was very close to the bosses of a few well-known clubs and had even told Yi Zhe to look for him if Yi Zhe wanted to go out to have fun, and that the booze price would drop by at least thirty percent.

Xu Tangcheng found Zheng Yikun's contact in Yi Zhe's phone. No one picked up on the first call. The second call rang three times, then connected.

"Hello?"

The booming sound made his ears hurt but Xu Tangcheng couldn't be bothered to move the phone away now. He raised his voice and asked Zheng Yikun where he was. On the other end, Zheng Yikun seemed to not hear him and called out "Hello?" again, even urging him to hurry up and speak.

"Where are you!"

Xu Tangcheng had never shouted so loudly in his entire life. After shouting those three words, even his throat started to hurt. He coughed. Yi Zhe no longer cared that he was still driving and reached out to grab the phone. He didn't put it against his ear and just placed it right next to his mouth, then hollered at Zheng Yikun to quickly find a quiet place and that there was something urgent.

After about more than ten seconds, Zheng Yikun's normal voice finally came from the other end. "What's the matter?"

Yi Zhe passed the phone to Xu Tangcheng.

"I'm Xu Tangcheng." After introducing himself with that line, Xu Tangcheng swiftly explained the situation to him. "Cheng Xu just called me. He was crying and fussing and I couldn't hear clearly what he said. I still don't know what on earth has happened and I also don't know where he is. He's no longer contactable now. But in the call just now, the background was very noisy, just like yours earlier on. He should be at a club. Yi Zhe and I don't know where to start looking so we want to ask you."

"Fuck." After hearing that, Zheng Yikun immediately let out a swear. "Is he alone or did a friend take him out?"

Xu Tangcheng knew that different situations could result in different consequences so he didn't dare conceal anything and spoke truthfully, "I don't know whether he's alone or not but I guess it's because of relationship issues."

"Then he's alone," Zheng Yikun answered very quickly.

The hand holding the phone tightened its grip. Xu Tangcheng looked at his own knees, not saying a word.

"He likes a man, doesn't he?" Zheng Yikun's words did not sound like he had any doubts. Without waiting for Xu Tangcheng's reply, he continued quickly, "Go to Des. Workers' Stadium, West Road, Destination."

At the start of this call, Xu Tangcheng could tell that Zheng Yikun had drunk quite a lot but at this moment, the other guy could still maintain a clear head and proceed to analyse the situation.

"I don't really know the gay clubs. That place is the most well-known gay club in Beijing, a lot of people will go there for their first clubbing experience, like some kind of bullshit passing rite. There was once when I said that I'll take him to a club to have some fun and he asked me about that place." Zheng Yikun's breathing became rough and disordered, like he was running. "I'm near Workers' Stadium. I'll go over to look for him."

Xu Tangcheng agreed. Zheng Yikun said a few more words, then hung up.

They drove towards Workers' Stadium, West Road. But things seemed to be especially bumpy tonight; the more they were in a rush, the more they met red lights, the wait making Xu Tangcheng more and more anxious. The whole time, the hand he rested on his knees tightened and loosened repeatedly. Yi Zhe saw that and reached over to cover it with his own hand.

That hand was scarily cold, and it also didn't hold his hand back.

"Don't panic." Yi Zhe rubbed lightly on the spot between Xu Tangcheng's thumb and index finger. "Didn't Zheng Yikun say that the club is considered safe and doesn't have that kind of messy stuff?"

His other arm resting on the car door, Xu Tangcheng rubbed his temple. After a period of silence, he said softly, "I thought he was all right already."

Yi Zhe didn't understand the situation and couldn't say anything at the moment. He only gripped Xu Tangcheng's hand a little tighter and increased the temperature on the air-conditioning in the car.

Following Zheng Yikun's directions, they very quickly found the club. It had a very unassuming exterior from which the noise and clamour inside could not be seen at all. At the entrance, they bumped into Zheng Yikun whose head was covered in sweat from running. All three of them did not have pleasant expressions on their faces. After going in, Zheng Yikun turned his head back and said to Yi Zhe, "Later on, the two of you stick together. And also, no matter what happens, you cannot get into a fight here."

Yi Zhe stared blankly, not comprehending what he meant by those words. Zheng Yikun couldn't be bothered to explain. Walking ahead, he led them into the club.

On the ground level was the dance floor. At this hour, it was still at the stage where human bodies were squeezed together. Xu Tangcheng was worrying about Cheng Xu so his steps were hurried from the start and he did not give himself any time at all to get used to the suddenly changing surroundings. Like he had suddenly barged into a strange world, he found it difficult to describe how he felt at the moment when he first stepped onto the edge of the chaos and saw the crowd in the room.

On the stage, a well-built man was dancing sensually in only his underwear. Below the stage, the actions of the crowd showed only the most simple form of worship for fleshly desires. The cheering crowd reached their hands out with no reservations, the person on stage similarly showed no signs of embarrassment. Xu Tangcheng even saw a hand reach into the man's underwear. The man was smiling as he twisted his body, everyone was shrieking. This scene was an overwhelming assault on Xu Tangcheng's senses, so he quickly moved his gaze away and continued to move forward.

They brushed past two men. One of them was pushing the other against the wall and they were hugging, lips locked in passion. Xu Tangcheng had no intention of peeping but as his eyes swept around searching, they unavoidably swept past that spot. In that quick glimpse, he saw that they were stroking each other without any apprehension, and one of the faces that could be seen had an expression of joy. Xu Tangcheng could even almost hear the moans spilling from that mouth amidst the blasting high-decibel music.

Unlike what Xu Tangcheng had imagined, the excitement in this place was not at all something contained in words—passionate yet empty, free yet isolating. Compared to the life that occupied most of the people's time, this was the pitch darkness under the dazzling multicoloured lights, giving a chance for all emotions and desires to be laid bare, and also pulling up a large screen for them. Anyone who walked in here could remove everything concealing them and lose themselves in abandon and joy without being mocked or ridiculed.

There were people having dance-offs with strangers in the dance pit, there were people wearing wigs and thick makeup, and there were people switching kissing partners three times in the space of five minutes.

Just like how tears could be concealed in the pouring rain, in here, no one would notice your madness because everything around you was uniformly engulfed in overflowing madness.

Xu Tangcheng's discomfort with the surroundings was slow to emerge. The multicoloured lights and the gyrating bodies dazzled his eyes and then, all of a sudden, the noise and clamour pounded into him until his mind went blank. He stopped moving. For a moment, his mind was at a loss, like he was suddenly directionless.

A hand landed on his shoulder, holding him, taking him to continue moving forward through the crowd made up of all kinds of people.

He turned his head and saw Yi Zhe. His tense lower jaw was his ordinary state, no different from the usual.

Looking for someone in a place like this was way too difficult. The three of them made a round of the areas on the first floor other than the dance pit but saw no sign of Cheng Xu. Zheng Yikun looked upstairs, then at the dance pit; finally, he turned and squeezed into that mass of gyrating bodies. Xu Tangcheng and Yi Zhe followed suit, going in a different direction from Zheng Yikun.

There were too many people in the dance pit and they were also all in different states of excitement, doing different things. Xu Tangcheng kept seeing face after face enlarged before his eyes. They smiled at him, and there was even someone who approached him, their body twisting, trying to pull him to dance together. They kept colliding and rubbing up against other people's bodies, the mingled smell of perfumes and cigarettes slipping into their noses…

In the end, Xu Tangcheng was practically half-carried by Yi Zhe as they moved forward.

Yi Zhe was the first to see Cheng Xu. He suddenly changed directions, his arm around Xu Tangcheng as he turned to the right and pointed at a corner of the dance pit. A very tall man was hugging Cheng Xu and kissing him. Cheng Xu's eyes were opened and his glasses had disappeared, revealing the blankness in his eyes.

Xu Tangcheng's heart tightened. He swiftly squeezed his way there but when there were still a few layers of people between them, he saw the man reach a hand into Cheng Xu's sweatpants. Cheng Xu's brows furrowed all of a sudden and he pressed his hands against the man's shoulders. The man suddenly bent down and said something laughingly into his ear; Cheng Xu's hand immediately stopped what it was doing and no longer pushed the man away.

And so, the man tightened his arms, pressing Cheng Xu close against his own body. Following that, he straightened his back, imitating a certain kind of action.

Immediately, Xu Tangcheng felt as though something had exploded in his head. His face heated up with anger. He no longer cared whether he was pushing other people aside, his actions almost rude as he barged towards that corner. But he had just parted a way in the crowd and hadn't yet had the chance to do anything when someone suddenly charged out from the side and reached out a hand to grab Cheng Xu's arm, pulling hard.

The man was caught off-guard. Zheng Yikun deftly pulled Cheng Xu into his arms.

Cheng Xu naturally did not realise what was going on. He stared vacantly at the person in front of him, unmoving, and also not speaking. The corners of his eyes were also red.

Zheng Yikun lowered his head to look at him. A moment later, he suddenly caressed Cheng Xu's head. He raised an eyebrow and said loudly, "Babe, why are you so disobedient? I've been looking for you for a long time already."

After saying that, he looked at the man who was taking advantage just now.

The few of them were standing very near each other. When he heard Zheng Yikun's words just now, the man also raised his brows and cocked his head, asking with an innocent look on his face, "You guys are a pair?"

Zheng Yikun didn't say anything and only stared at him without moving his eyes. He smiled.

The man looked at him, then at the dazed Cheng Xu, as though he was confirming.

"Did you kiss him?" Zheng Yikun asked suddenly with a smile that was not quite a smile.

"I didn't know he had a partner." The man smiled and shrugged, raising both hands to his chest. "He was here alone for a long while."

In here, unpartnered strangers embracing and kissing and stroking each other was a sight that couldn't be any more common.

After hearing that, Zheng Yikun reached a hand out to pinch Cheng Xu's chin, forcing Cheng Xu to lift his head and look at him. For some unknown reason, Cheng Xu's eyes were redder than before and his lips were pressed together too tightly, so much so that the corners of his mouth were slightly pushed down, like he was about to cry. Zheng Yikun lowered his head and drew closer to Cheng Xu's face, their lips almost touching.

"Babe…" He looked into Cheng Xu's eyes and made his words sound ambiguous. "You're going to be done for tonight."

After saying that, without giving him any room to argue, he pressed Cheng Xu's face into his chest and did not let Cheng Xu expose his face anymore. The man at the side wanted to continue saying something but his eyes drifted downwards to a certain spot and he suddenly froze.

Xu Tangcheng saw him suddenly shake his head and say with a smile, "All right, no wonder."

Before leaving, the man patted Zheng Yikun's shoulder and apologised.

Xu Tangcheng walked over and wanted to pull up the person whose head was buried but unexpectedly, when Cheng Xu felt someone tugging at him from behind, he suddenly hugged Zheng Yikun tightly with both arms and even shuffled a step forward, pressing closer to Zheng Yikun.

Xu Tangcheng was stunned. He thought that Cheng Xu hadn't seen him just now.

"Cheng Xu." He patted Cheng Xu's back with one hand and said into his ear, "I'm Xu Tangcheng."

Who knew if it was because he hadn't heard him clearly or if it was some other reason, Cheng Xu still didn't lift his head. He seemed very nervous, both his hands tugging at Zheng Yikun's clothes, fists tightened in a death grip.

"He's drunk," Zheng Yikun interjected. "Let's get out first. We'll talk outside."

Xu Tangcheng was not in a good mood right now. The surroundings in which he did not fit in at all, the situation that he had not imagined and was out of his control—they all made him jittery and uneasy. He turned around, wanting to call Yi Zhe and go out, but saw that a guy with a delicate appearance had come to stand behind Yi Zhe at some point. The guy was rubbing his chest against Yi Zhe's back, one hand about to land on Yi Zhe's shoulder.

Their eyes met. In his astonishment, Xu Tangcheng saw the emotions in the depths of those eyes—like they were seeing a long-admired prey, infatuated and full of the desire to try.

There were people everywhere. Bodies rubbing against each other was nothing uncommon. Yi Zhe didn't sense anything unusual going on at his back and continued to stand there, looking right at Xu Tangcheng.

That guy was clearly not as sensible as the man just now. After receiving Xu Tangcheng's gaze, not only did he not retreat, he even returned the look with a provocative smile. He also got on tiptoes, stretched his neck, and moved his lips towards the back of Yi Zhe's ear.

Xu Tangcheng finally understood why Zheng Yikun had told them not to get into fights.

At this moment, Yi Zhe noticed the strangeness in Xu Tangcheng's look but before he could turn around, Xu Tangcheng had already stepped forward and grabbed his arm, pulling him over to him.

Xu Tangcheng did not pause and immediately pulled him to walk to the exit. Yi Zhe finally saw the guy when he turned around; the guy was wearing a light yellow short-sleeved shirt so thin that the outline of the young body could be seen. The guy was looking at him meaningfully and when he saw Yi Zhe turn his eyes to him, he even licked his lips and gave him a smile.

He really could not stay there any longer. Xu Tangcheng had an urgent need to go out but Zheng Yikun said that Cheng Xu needed to go to the washroom and that the two of them should head out first, he would take Cheng Xu there himself.

Xu Tangcheng nodded. Zheng Yikun quickly took Cheng Xu away, his arm around him.

Glancing at the person who was still hugging Zheng Yikun and refusing to look up, for some reason, Xu Tangcheng had a strange feeling. He knew that he shouldn't make presumptuous guesses about other people but after taking a couple of steps towards the door, he still could not convince himself and changed directions, pulling Yi Zhe along.

The line at the washroom door was not a short one. What made Xu Tangcheng and Yi Zhe surprised was that this line was mostly men but there were also a few girls interspersed here and there. Zheng Yikun and Cheng Xu were not in the line so they came to a stop and didn't continue searching deeper inside. Before leaving, Xu Tangcheng turned to glance at the washroom door and happened to see a man and a woman go in one after the other.

It was only later on that he found out that the washroom on the first floor of Des was really unisex.

"Where did they go?" Xu Tangcheng felt uneasy. He pulled Yi Zhe down beside him and asked into his ear with a frown.

He had just finished speaking when the two of them saw Zheng Yikun's back at the same time.

Cheng Xu and him were in a dark blindspot. Cheng Xu leaned against the wall, both hands around Zheng Yikun's neck. He wasn't standing straight and Zheng Yikun was also blocking him from view. Right now, only a small corner of his head was revealed and his expression couldn't be seen.

Only a glance, and Xu Tangcheng and Yi Zhe knew what Zheng Yikun was doing from the slight, non-stop jerking of his arm.

"Fuck." Yi Zhe never imagined that Zheng Yikun would do this to Cheng Xu and he blurted out a swear. He panicked and wanted to go over immediately but he had just taken a step when Xu Tangcheng stopped him.

Not far away, Cheng Xu's arms suddenly tightened around Zheng Yikun, then swiftly loosened a few seconds later. Zheng Yikun shifted and held the person in his arms even tighter.

If Xu Tangcheng's eyes were not mistaken, he even lowered his head and kissed Cheng Xu.

When they got out, Zheng Yikun and Cheng Xu were already waiting outside. Cheng Xu was no longer hugging Zheng Yikun now and was instead crouching by the roadside on his own, looking at the ground, thinking of who knew what. Zheng Yikun stood beside him, smoking, his brows tightly furrowed. The cigarette smoke seemed to be so frightened by his ferocity that it didn't dare linger, disappearing in a rush before it could take shape in the air.

"He can't ride in cars, can he?" Seeing them come out, Zheng Yikun said from where he was. "I'll carry him and look for a place to sleep. You guys go home."

"No need." Xu Tangcheng gave Zheng Yikun an indifferent look, then walked over to Cheng Xu's side and crouched down to ask him how he was.

This chilly look, added to the fact that the two of them had come out so late, let Zheng Yikun immediately make a very astute guess. He shifted his gaze to Yi Zhe. Yi Zhe was also looking at him, the expression on his face rather unpleasant.

Zheng Yikun turned his head away and laughed to himself. He flicked the ashes towards the bottom of the large tree.

The night was cold, the wind strong. A layer of ash hit the greenery and scattered, floating down at an angle. Cheng Xu, silent all the while, suddenly reached out a hand to catch them. Xu Tangcheng saw it and pushed his hand down at once.

Cheng Xu reached out his other hand to scoop up the last bit of ash in the air.

The ash escaped between the gaps of his fingers. Like he was in a drunken craze, he suddenly waved that hand around in the empty air, fighting to throw himself forward. It gave Xu Tangcheng a fright and he quickly held Cheng Xu back by his shoulders, pulling him into his arms. But who knew where the drunkard's strength came from; he knocked Xu Tangcheng into swaying on his feet and the two of them nearly fell to the ground.

Yi Zhe quickly came up and held Cheng Xu steady on the other side. Restrained by two people, Cheng Xu continued to kick up a fuss, indistinct mumbles coming out of his mouth, still insisting on catching the ash that was no longer there.

Zheng Yikun took a couple of steps and crouched down in front of Cheng Xu. He quietly watched Cheng Xu make a fuss for a few seconds, then suddenly took a deep inhale on his cigarette, held Cheng Xu's wrist as he leaned his body forward, and breathed out all the smoke into Cheng Xu's face.

"Cough…"

Choking, Cheng Xu bent his body and coughed non-stop.

"What are you doing?" Yi Zhe asked before Xu Tangcheng could open his mouth.

Zheng Yikun didn't reply. He let go of Cheng Xu and opened a hand flat in front of him. From a distance very near that palm, his fingers holding the cigarette flicked lightly. Half the stick trembled.

A section of ash fell right into his palm, still carrying with them the sparks that had yet to go out, that were struggling in the darkness of the night.

In unison, Xu Tangcheng and Yi Zhe looked at him in shock. But Zheng Yikun seemed to not notice them. His face calm, he shook that hand, gathering the ash together.

Then, he gently pulled up Cheng Xu's hand, opened his fingers, and poured the ash that had rapidly cooled down into his palm.