Once we realize that things that happen in the world, including the way other people act, are not wholly in our power, we come into possession of a wonderful gift, for now we can engage in our affairs with a sort of serenity, a newfound peace of mind and an empowering confidence. We do this by acting ‘with reservation’. Seneca says:
The safest policy is rarely to tempt [Fortune], though to keep her always in mind and to trust her in nothing. Thus: ‘I shall sail unless something happens’; and ‘I shall become praetor unless something prevents me’, and ‘My business will be successful unless something interferes.’ That is why we say that nothing happens to a wise man against his expectation.
(Seneca, On Tranquillity of Mind 13.2–3, trans. Costa 1997, 51–2)
Two further extracts illustrate the same approach:
They [the Stoics] say that nothing happens to the good man which is contrary to his inclination or his impulse or his intention, on account of the fact that he does everything of this kind with a reservation, and nothing which he would not want can happen unexpectedly.
(Stobaeus 2.115.5–9, trans. Donini, Inwood and Donini 1999, 737)
The wise man sets about every action with reservation: ‘if nothing happens which might stop him’. For this reason we say that he always succeeds and that nothing unexpected happens to him: because within himself he considers the possibility that something will get in the way and prevent what he is proposing to do.
(Seneca, On Benefits 4.34.4, trans. Donini, Inwood and Donini 1999, 737)
Marcus Aurelius uses the term hupexhairesis (‘with reservation’) five times in the Meditations, at 4.1, 5.20, 6.50, 8.41 and 11.37.
Read
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 4.1.
This is a fairly technical passage, and we need to define some of Marcus’ expressions. The phrase 'That which holds the mastery within us' in the first sentence is best thought of as our power of agency, that aspect of ourselves which thinks and feels and decides what to do. The Stoics believed that there is a proper way for us to use our capacity for agency when dealing with affairs in the world which they described as ‘living according to nature’. We will explore this idea in a later lesson. ‘High aims’ are the preferred indifferents (which we discussed in Lesson 2), so in the first part of this paragraph, Marcus says that the proper way for us to engage with the world is to pursue the preferred indifferents ‘with reservation’. And if we fail to get what we had aimed for, like a burning fire that ‘masters’ (i.e. burns) everything that falls into it, we will immediately turn ourselves in a creative and responsible way to the new situation we are in. Indeed, in our capacity to deal with new developments, especially after a disappointment or failure, we should be not like a ‘little lamp’ but like a ‘blazing fire’.
Write
In your journal, write about a time when an activity you were engaged in did not turn out as you had expected it. Were you surprised by the actual result? Could you have foreseen the way things turned if you had thought about it before hand? Could you have planned differently? Most importantly, when you consider engaging in the same or similar activity now, do you consider all the things that could happen while striving to reach your aim?
Read: Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 5.20 and 6.50.
There’s an age old saying that goes:
“When Life hands you lemons, make lemonade.”
The saying may be tired (though it has spawned numerous humorous versions) the sentiment it expresses remains true to this day.
When we are faced with obstructive or even bad people who block our plans, we should recognize that ‘they are not hindrances to [our] impulses or [our] disposition’ – they cannot prevent us from attempting to do what is both sensible and right. We are not like Marcus who, as emperor, had absolute authority over everyone, though in family life, and in the business world, we may exercise a certain degree of authority over others; and when it is appropriate we should ‘try to persuade’ bad people into better behavior. But if the worst happens, and our actions are thwarted we should retain our equanimity and ‘refuse to yield to distress’. What we had intended to do was of course done ‘with reservation’, and was not unconditional. To always require success is to aim at the impossible. But in aiming to do what is right and sensible ‘with reservation’ we have in merely trying met with complete success.
When we face a setback we must ‘display another virtue’ – certainly remaining calm and patient is important, and if we do that we are likely to be able to make a more intelligent reassessment of the situation. We will have to decide whether there is any hope of pursuing our aim in some other way, or whether we must abandon it. And as Stoics, so long as we have deliberated intelligently, abandoning some action is for us a success, for all we are doing is rationally turning away from just one particular scheme in order to devote ourselves to another one that we believe to be more worthy of our ‘ruling power’.
In short, what the Stoic is able to do is pick up new roles and new aims, as circumstances require, without getting frustrated and angry. ‘I was driving along, and my car broke down!’ So now you must stop being a driver and become someone who sorts out a broken-down car. ‘The bank manager refused to make the loan!’ So now your plans must change. ‘But I was going to start my own business!’ And now you must think again; and does getting upset really help matters? ‘But the stupid manager didn’t understand my business plan!’ And who told you that you were destined to have a highly intelligent bank manager?
Discuss
With your discussion partner, identify three or four incidents (recent or long past, as you please) in which your aim to have something happen was thwarted, and which you consider serve as good examples of how you can get upset about things. Write brief accounts of exactly what happened and how you felt. With respect to each situation, imagine that you had had the good fortune to meet with a Stoic who encourages you to act ‘with reservation’. If necessary, explain the concept of acting ‘with reservation’ to your discussion partner.
Between the two of you, try to come up with the sorts of thing that the Stoic would have said to you. Do you think such a conversation would have helped you to cope better?
Write
Over the next two weeks, Identify three or four activities you have planned for the next week or two. Explore how you will attempt to engage in your activities ‘with reservation’. Think not only about what you are seeking to accomplish, but how you will proceed. What could change that would prevent you from reaching your target?
Once you have performed these tasks, come back to your journal and record how well or badly they went. Did things turn out as you had expected? Were you successful at acting ‘with reservation’? Did you detect any benefit from making the attempt?
Continue to use your journal daily to record your thoughts and activities with regards to the previous lessons as well.