Take Care Of You

Take Care Of You- An Article On Self-Care 

I sometimes find myself wasting my time on social media, specifically Instagram, looking through other people’s posts and stories. Usually, people I don’t even know or care to know. It can be a friend that I haven’t spoken to in years, and I didn’t plan to speak to her again, or maybe it’s an “Instagram Influencer” whose life seems to be summed up in a picture-perfect page. She shares all the gifts and special attention her husband gives her. She even shares her gorgeous kitchen: decor and her quartz or marble kitchen counters with luxurious appliances and also a picture-perfect pantry. I look through the pictures, and I am in awe of how beautiful it is, and how her kitchen is truly a dream kitchen of mine. As I go through her page, I find myself wondering if her husband truly is that kind, or does he just gift her often to compensate for something else he is lacking?  He can’t be perfect after all! I know I am not the only one who does this. I am not the only one who spends wasted hours on social media looking at videos and pictures that will do us no good in our lives. In fact, they hinder our growth and our personal goals. Social media is just one way we choose to waste our time. I am here to share with you tips and tricks on how to take care of yourself and only you. I want to share with you my experience in how I have decided to put myself first and how to avoid looking at unrealistic Instagram posts and unrealistic expectations in my life. 

My first tip, yes you guessed it, get off social media! Many research actually shows that social media is a major cause of depression amongst our youth. Here is an article from Harvard that discusses how social media can lead to depression and other problems Harvard article It prevents our brain from engaging in meaningful thoughts and meaningful conversations. I witnessed this firsthand. I am a 32-year-old woman and when I seldomly sit with someone between the ages of 18 and 25, I am shocked by their weak vocabulary,  lack of meaningful conversations, and simple knowledge. I end up questioning myself, why? Am I just old and from another generation or is our youth just not smart anymore? The truth is: that the perfect couple you see on social media travel monthly and seem to be living their lives, are also struggling with infertility. When you admire and envy their traveling, remember to instead be grateful for the healthy children that you have. The family that seems so rich and is spending their wealth lavishly while you wish you had just a fourth of their wealth, is also the family that does not pray and whose children are lost in this world. Remember to be grateful for your relationship with Allah and that you would rather be close to Allah and be poor or just comfortable rather than rich and lost in your head.  Always remember the good that you have, and never compare your life with someone who you’re seeing through the lens of a screen. Because that is not real. Spend time doing things you love because doing things that make us happy leads us to happier and healthier lives. 

This takes me to my next tip: take care of yourself. Choose to be happy. I know that when I wake up in the morning I have two choices to make: I either stay in my pajamas while I deal with my toddler and 7 year old (I am not a morning person), I make my coffee and sit down to drink it while ignoring their complaints and arguments, or I can choose to change into fresh clothes, put some earrings on, and smile.  The first option sets a negative tone for my kids and me. The second allows me to feel fresh, happy, and ready to face my day and its challenges. When you wake up: smile, brush your hair, maybe put some lipstick on and expect a positive day ahead of you. It might seem silly to wake up one day and put lipstick on and make your hair look nice because maybe it is not something you typically do but try it, and I promise you that it will change your day. 

Tip number three: have you ever heard of the saying, you are who your friends are? Yes, it is true! Here is something I have been doing over the years. If I am spending time with a friend, and I don’t feel good after our time together ends, then I think about why that is. I think about the energy we bring together and I think about how we are benefiting each other through this friendship. Or are we harming each other with negative conversations and wasting our time? Look around you, look at the people in your circle and think about the energy they create around you. If you don’t feel good while you are around them or you feel they are in the way of your personal growth, maybe it is time to rethink the friendship. If you are spending time with someone who makes you feel good and brings out the best in you, then that is the friend that you want to keep. I have an Egyptian friend who literally makes my heart feel full and makes me feel like I am beaming with positivity and joy. Having any type of conversation with her always reminds me of the beauty of life and she always emphasizes my strengths without even trying. If you feel you have no choice but to be around people that don’t support your personal growth, because maybe they are at family functions or community events, then maybe just keep the conversation minimal and bring up positive things to discuss. You need people in your life who uplift you. 

Tip number four: read a book! Reading a book is not only good for our minds but it is good for our souls. I am personally still trying to perfect this tip. I have a book next to my bedside and I do read it but not as often as I would like. I love reading a good book but sometimes it’s just easier to get on our phone ten minutes before bed just to check the last email you got or the last message you received. It is much better for our brains and our sleep if we end our day with a book rather than a screen in our face. If you are religious—pick up your book of faith. If you do not enjoy reading at all and you feel this tip is just not for you then simply sit down and do nothing. Yes, that’s right, do nothing! That is my final tip. 

Tip number five: I know it sounds so silly and like it is such a waste of time. But doing nothing can do wonders for you. When we are allowing our mind to relax from all the thoughts and concerns of our day, we are giving it a chance to recover from our day. If your mind is always on and always thinking of what you need to do, your to-do list, the laundry, the dirty dishes, or what you are cooking for dinner tomorrow, you will burn out. So shut it off, take a break by putting your feet up and closing your eyes, and just releasing all the negative thoughts and concerns and let them slowly depart you one by one. 

Here is a list of a couple of books that you can start with: 

I am not a mental health professional or a doctor but I do spend a good amount of time learning. I learn as much as I can and in many forms and I hope that my voice in this article can be a way of learning for you and for your peace of mind. In the end, we all need to take care of ourselves, because if you do not take care of yourself then you cannot take care of the people you love. So start with you, go look in the mirror and smile and tell that person that today is the day when you will take care of YOU! 


If you are having a hard time taking care of yourself and you need help on how and where to start, please reach out to us on our blog and we can direct you to someone who will understand your concerns. Click on the link below and you will find many resources as well as a helpline, on the blog. 

bit.ly/Rahet-Bali


04.14.2022