I feel as though the Covid-19 pandemic has caused a seismic tear in both the communities of the internet and real-life by upheaving peace and normalcy.

Online, new articles, hashtags, and posts about every little update and tidbit about the Coronavirus are being pumped out every second, every minute, every hour, every day and in every corner, leaving no digital stones untouched. Panic runs rampant as the rhetoric portrays the beginning of the apocalypse and the end of the world as we know it. It’s as if the internet has been set ablaze with no fire-exits to escape, with no firefighters to extinguish the flames.

While in real life, the world feels paralyzed in a suspenseful state of anticipation of the dreaded future. It’s eerily quiet, with almost no one is outside out and about, the only sounds that can be heard are the occasional birds chirping, the soft drops of the spring rain, and the wind whistling through the trees. Despite the crystal clears blue skies from the lack of traffic, the future couldn’t be more obfuscated and befogged as everyone waits anxiously in isolation hoping for the pandemic to pass.

While they may seem radically different on the surface, they both share an underlying root of fear that drives both of their reactions. Fear floods the internet with so much information that it overwhelms everyone on it, causing chaos and panic. While on the other hand, the unknown and highly contagious nature of the virus causes almost everyone to be scared straight and stiff in their homes, with nearly no one even daring to leave them even for the essentials.

But I feel incredibly optimistic about the future, there is an antidote to fear, as it is HOPE that will pull us through these difficult times. By having faith that this virus will pass, listening to the medical professionals and authorities, staying indoors, keeping good hygiene, social distancing, not giving in to the fear-mongering (like hoarding toilet paper and such), and being mindful and supportive for those deeply affected either physically or emotionally, I whole- heartily believe that we will be able to persevere and come out stronger than ever!

I have been confined within the walls of my house since March 11. I can feel the mental fatigue waning in me as I struggle to find motivation to wake up in the morning. I start off the day by rolling out of bed and putting on some sweats and a hoodie. After that I stroll by the kitchen and pick up the coffee my mom woke up early to make for me. As I pick it up, I thank her, and she responds with a warm smile.

I begin to check notifications on my phone as I await my first class to begin. As my first period class ends, I finally start to feel awake and I make myself some breakfast during my free period. After my breakfast I continue with my classes and try my best to stay focused but regardless of which class I’m in, I usually doze off and start to daydream of how things used to be before the quarantine.

As a senior there is a lot less stress second semester. Its that second semester that everyone in high school looks forward to. All the hard work you have put in the previous years, those late nights you stayed up to finish projects, research papers, or studying for a test. All those are just memories and you have the privilege of looking back and reflecting about what a long way you’ve come, and how for better or worse they are just memories. You begin to ponder about the new chapter you’re about to start in life.....and then it hits you, you still have a quiz for physics next period that you have to study for and how you’re barely half way through the day.

I wait for it to turn 2:45, so I can finally get off the screen and do something, anything. I’m a very energetic person and my days before this consisted of practicing for soccer and then having weights after practice, 6 days a week. I leave my desk and put on some short and pick up my soccer stuff. I blast some music while working out up until I hear my mom scream for me to come inside and eat. After I eat I turn on the tv and watch some Netflix, only bad part is I’ve seen most of my shows and I struggle to find anything entertaining, so I go on my phone and text some friends or I’ll FaceTime a friend until it’s time to go to sleep.

From a young age, the one thing I commonly think of around this time of the year is High School Graduation. As I see this yearly graduation partake, it gets me excited as I think about my own. It brings be joy to imagine seeing all my friends and family members. That was just one fond memory I envisioned, amongst the many other that come with senior year. However, my hopes have started to diminish. The day in found out about our school getting shut down, I was extremely disappointed for many reasons:

1. I knew it would be longer than two weeks, so I wished I could have done that day over again, spending more quality time with everyone.

2. Professional Sports were cancelled, making the world seem really empty.

3. School sports were canceled, so all the offseason work felt like it went to waste. They were also my extended family because I spent so much time with them. Normally, something like this would not have so much meaning, but the fact that it was my last chance for so many things hurt.

In response to the virus, we moved to online school which is quite interesting. After a few weeks, I can safely say I hope we never use online schooling again. With the combination of online school and the shelter in place, I have spent way too much time at home. My typical day usually consists of the following: school from 8:15-2:45, some form of outdoor exercise until 5, dinner and homework, and lights out at 9pm. We meet up with our teachers and are given work to do on call, or on our own time. The homework has been pretty minimal but has gone down to reduce screen time. After, I usually ride my bike for an hour and then walk to the beach which is a nice way to relax. I find it enjoyable because it is very quiet, and I can think about stuff. Then after a nice meal, I go back on my computer and finish my assignments. This routine feels very normal now, and the pain of not being with my friends has slowly decreased. I have accepted that it Is reality. Each day as it worsens, I wonder how my college situation will play out. I am supposed to study in London for my first semester, but as each day goes on, I start to think it won’t be a reality either.

As everything seems to be spiraling down, I try to look at the good things that can come from these times. It is a chance to spend more time with my family before I leave for college. More sleep can’t go wrong with that. I can go spend time around town, something I do not do often due to my busy schedule. More people are taking care of their hygiene, something that most definitely will continue later on. I am thankful that I am healthy as the virus spreads more. When I see others complaining that they are bored, I try to not do the same. I have been blessed with so much, it makes me feel a little ungrateful. Each day brings a new challenge, but all I can do is pray and be grateful. Rather than whine about what is happening, try to embrace the challenge.

The Covid 19 Pandemic has impacted my life primarily in a negative way. It is depressing to watch the news and see the panic and death toll spreading not only in my local region, the Bay Area, but also around the world.

My daily routine has definitely been impacted. Although my school has moved to 9:30 am start, this has actually worsened my sleep schedule. Lack of structure is destructive for me as an individual, and I need it in order to operate effectively in my daily life. As a result, I use the fact that I no longer physically attend class to convince myself that in some ways school is sort of well, over. I am staying up later because I can wake up later and putting off or not completing homework assignments. Senioritis has definitely impacted me greatly immediately after we moved to online schooling, and I struggle to find motivation to complete my work even though my grades are slipping. Like I said, I am an individual that requires structure and consistency in my daily life, and Covid-19 has brought anything but that.

Moreover, Covid-19 has impacted not only my schooling but also my friendships. While I struggle with the worst grades I have ever had in my high-school career, I am unable to seek comfort, support, and motivation from friends. We have been cut off from each other. The most disappointing part is that my friends and I had planned and counted on this precious time in years past to enjoy ourselves together. My friend group consists of some extremely hard working and high-achieving individuals, and two of my close friends were accepted to Ivies and Stanford. As a result, even though we’ve spent time together over the years, school has always been the priority and we haven’t ever fully let loose and prioritized our relationships and having fun over school. We had anticipated that this spring semester would provide that opportunity for us, but unfortunately it clearly has not. Facetiming or texting is not the same as speeding down open roads with all the windows down and blasting music with your friends. We have lost those moments. Additionally, I recently formally entered a relationship. My girlfriend and I made it official just days before quarantine started, so this has been extremely difficult for us. We want to go out and have fun, and share our adventures on social media, but now we are stuck calling and facetiming, and watching Netflix together gets boring through a screen.

Additionally, my parents lost a significant portion of savings in the stock market crash. It is now uncertain whether I may be able to attend certain colleges or fix up my classic car with my families given financial situation. In past months these would have been negligible expenses. Additionally, my parents are considering holding me back from college for a gap year, out of fear that another wave of the pandemic will hit in the fall and winter as predicted, ruining my freshman college experience and perhaps impacting my grades.

Although all of the things I have stated about Covid-19 thus far are negative, not everything that has resulted from it has been negative for me. I am blessed to live by one of the largest and most beautiful open space parks in the entire Bay Area. I have been forcing myself to utilize my neighborhood park entrance to get out and exercise. I am proud to say that I have been running a minimum of 2.5 miles everyday for around 2 and a half weeks now. I have noticed changes in my fitness and muscular build, which is motivating. Additionally, it is very peaceful and beautiful to run up to stunning views overlooking the valley in the hills.

All in all, I hope this ends soon so I can make up for lost time with my friends and girlfriend over summer. I also hope that the stock market slowly regains its value because my parents stayed in the market so if the share values increase, they will not lose their savings.