How did I create each sound?

Pen - I used a gel pen and drew circles in a notebook.

Shuffling - I zipped and unzipped a duffle bag whilst shaking it around.

Air tone - I recorded 20 sec of room ambience.

Dialogue - I simply recorded myself tutting, humming & saying ouch.

Do I think I was successful in creating foley sounds?

I do think I was quite successful in created an effective edit. All the sounds I used matched the scene pretty well.

How would I improve this task?

To improve, I'd use a male voice for more interesting speech and a more corresponding to flow to the scene. I'd also use a longer or more detailed clip for a better edit. Lastly I'd record some footsteps/ walking as foley sound.