Teefly Intrigue
"You only see me when I want you to see me" ~ Botley FlimFlam
What is a Teef? What do they do?
Don't forget to wear your group tag so everyone knows your rank or position! The Skull Coast denizens talk. A lot. When someone earns rank, word spreads quickly.
A Teef is interested in one thing and one thing only (most days), and that's earning coin. There is very little a Teef WON'T do to line their pockets with someone else's hard earned money.
Some Teef choose to increase their wealth the old fashioned way: Through hard work and skilled labor. A vast majority of Teefs are exceptional craftsmen who practice woodcarving, metalworking, and even alchemical creations. From fixing doors, to crafting custom fit armors, to honing a dulled blade, there's a Teefly Tusk for every occasion!
Be wary however... There are some Teefs who excel at deception, trickery, and are the kings and queens of laziness. These Teefs may boast of being the best of the best and sell you a 'high quality' piece of merchandise, only for it to break upon first use. There is a well known Meatbeatles song these particular Teefs sing on the regular: NO REFUNDS!
So long as the sale is completed and coins change hands, a Teef is as happy as a clam soaked in wine!
A lesser known aspect of being a Teef, is their skills in subterfuge and stealth. Teefs travel the region selling their wares, becoming a normal sight within the realms and therefore, often overlooked. A Teef knows when to listen. A GREAT Teef knows how to run a stall while ALSO listening. Information is everything after all!
A Tusks usual path to settling things that upset them is to Chorga their way through it. Break whatever blocks your path, and turn anyone who gets in your way into a bloody puddle. A Teef chooses a less conventional path: A Teef doesn't fight their battles, they PAY others to fight for them.
A well crafted poison slipped in the target's drink, a venom covered thumbtack left on their favorite chair at the brothel, paying a no-named hitman to corner them in an alley, employing a Chorga's strength to bully coins you are owed out of them.
These are but a few examples of how a Teef may choose to operate.
If there's ever a social gathering anywhere in the realm, you can bet your bottom copper that there will be a Teef behind a stall. Festivals, ceremonies, coronations.. There's no place a Teef would rather be than peddling their wares, legal or otherwise, to any passerby that stops long enough to listen.
A Teef's renown grows with the stories they tell. Such as:
How they duped a Helheim Count to buy a mushroom you claimed would increase their performance in bed.
How they got away with sneaking in an answer sheet during a CCOA exam and got a perfect score.
Bragging about how much coin you earned during the last Summerfest.
Boasting of how many people you drew to your game at The Great Goblin Bazaarnival.
Bragging about your wealth and betting it is common place amongst Teefs. Many choose to wager their hard earned coins in games of chance or betting on fights. These are all to honor the Grinning One. A Teef dreams of earning his favor, and the Grinning One likes it when his followers take risks. The rush of adrenaline, playing the odds, duping a rube with a well rehearsed hustle! If the Grinning One smiles upon you, it is Good Mog indeed!
"The Acquisition Of Coin Is The Virtue - How It Is Earned Is Not" - Tenet of Mog
Tusk Tasks - Teef Edition
The following tasks are posted to get a sense of direction if you've come to the Tusks to serve the Second Eye of Mog. The Second Eye oversees our brave little Teef and their enterprising hands, bringing the tribe whatever it is we cannot make ourselves, or making just that which we do best.
Should you choose to busy yourself on the Teef side of things, you can report your attempts, whether successful or failed, to the Hok'Teef, Edd (ederade.hannu). Either send a notecard of the RP, or select a few of your best posts from the RP and post them to #sim-ic-share-nsfw making sure to tag @{SC}Hok'Teef.
There is a Tusk wisdom that reads:
"The Acquisition of Coin is Virtue - How it is earned, is not."
We try to live up this this, by any means necessary. It is known.
The acquisition of value can be done in many ways, but the ones we recommend are gathering, crafting, selling, spying and stealing. We will discuss each in a section below with suggestions to make your time with us structured and meaningful.
For roleplay that involves either spying or stealing, please be aware of the sim rules for criminal behaviour.
Happy Teefing, Tusk!
.•°o.O Gathering O.o°•.
"If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere."
* Got some spare time on your hands? Head out into the jungle to harvest some wood or quarry a bit of stone! Make a pile somewhere the Grots can get to it for temple repairs or to replace that creaky floorboard in Grotsam.
* The jungle is full of life! Harvest plants, hunt wild game to sell the meat, bones, and pelts! Whether you sell to a fellow Tusk or to the Pebble People, coins are coins! We have access to materials the other factions can only dream of. Take advantage of this!
.•°o.O Fighting O.o°•.
"Why get thumped when you can pay someone else to take the beating for you?"
You're a smart Teef, yeah? Someone getting in your face looking for a scrap? Why are they so important that YOU need to put them in their place? Just pay someone else to kick their teeth in for you! There are surely plenty of people out there bloodthirsty enough to beat someone to a pulp for a little bit of coin.
.•°o.O Crafting O.o°•.
"We are always looking for bigger and better ways to blow stuff up."
Learn a trade from one of the pre-existing peoples you can meet all throughout the lands, not just Tusks. Apprentice yourself to one of them and learn what tricks you can while implementing your own style. For instance, you can ask the Hok'Jicho about his soaps.
If you have a trade, roleplay the various processes involved at length. Things take time to gather and craft. A beautiful necklace doesn't get created in a single day. If you do so in the open, you may generate interest. We would be happy to learn of those that take interest in your endeavors.
In case you've gone so far as to master your trade, try passing it on to the many peoples of the world...For a price. Though if you are indeed an expert, don't let your services come cheap.
Offer services, such as maintenance, upkeep, improvement, or creation from scratch to whomever might need it. Though, be sure to charge for your expertise. Not getting properly compensated is how accidents happen to people's precious things.
.•°o.O Selling O.o°•.
"I got the best deals, anywhere."
Ready to dip your toes into the entrepreneurial life? Grab some goblins and tell them to go set up the Bank of Mog stall! Contact Edd (ederadae.hannu) to get your copy of the stall! Your supplies may vary as you will have to go scrounge for dropped weapons, sell your own trinkets or whatever meat you kept for yourself instead of putting it in the Pot (greedy!). The goblins will also supply you with fresh meat beetles and a barrel of your choice of drink to feed and water any weary travelers that may pass by! (Minimum 5 copper for anything sold is suggested)
The jungle belongs to the Gorgun and therefore, the Tusks. We cannot allow people to walk through the GORGUN's jungle without paying tribute to the GREAT AND GLORIOUS ONE! Gather some Chorgas and set up checkpoints to charge people for safe passage. Sell them 'passes' that expire after one use (don't tell them this of course).
If you have things, sell your things! Money makes the world go round. Then use the money to buy more things to make into better things. In the cycle of business interests, a keen Teef can find a profit wherever they go. Make connections and friends, learn about their needs and then, provide to the best of your abilities.
Negotiate a connection between the Tusks and other enterprises that litter the lands of Sincadere, especially one with a lucrative position for you in it. Maintain these relationships! A face unseen is a face forgotten!
* Represent the Tusks and our wares by obtaining a deal on our limited products; Meatgrindah the Gathering Cards, Meat Beetles albums, Bogpatch Dolls, Primal Masks, and the many other collectible things the Tusks have for sale. Speak with Hok'Teef Edd (ederade.hannu), Bah'Jicho Jolek (angilias.Wassersztrom), or Bahgun Brokil (BandXofXOrcs.Resident) to carry our items.
ADVERTISE! People don't know what they don't know, so it's up to you to let them know wots wot! Do a graffiti run! Bring a friend too to watch your back. Nothing sucks as much as being halfway through a masterpiece of vandalism only to get caught!
.•°o.O Spying O.o°•.
"Infiltrate and Infuriate!"
Knowledge is power, and a way to decent money and decent Mog. Find out who the Big Deals are in the various lands. Listen in on them, acquire juicy gossip on them. And don't let it go without asking a good price for it. It might be a good idea to mask your intentions by setting up a stall to sell things. Loose lips flap around a busy stall!
The various peoples of Sincadere are very fond of paperwork. Obtain as much of it as you can, get past as many legal barriers as you can. Properly signed paperwork will get you privileges and access to operate more freely.
Should you find yourself in need of paperwork, but can't get it signed? Have it forged. You're a sneaky Teef, you know your way around legitimacy, just make sure you follow the forgery guidelines.
.•°o.O Stealing O.o°•.
"Never ask when you can take"
Pick someone's pockets. There is usually good stuff in there! Coins, baubles, lint, and so much more! The Hok'Teef is sure to have an interest in the products of your clever hands and especially the story of how you got away with it.
Break into a secured site. There are places in Sincadere that are particularly guarded. Helheim's keep, the Basilica, the Cabbala's keep, the CCOA Headmistress' office, the Empire's Imperial Palace, and so many more! Go play tourist Teef style and see all the sights you're not meant to see. And most importantly, live to tell the tale.
Obtain a captive through kidnapping. Whereas the Chorga would have you believe that all you need to take someone is a whack on the head until they stop moving, you can do better! A subtle poison here, a quick rope in all the right places, then a departure from the city, hidden in a crate right under the guards' noses? Teefing done right. Just make sure to review for the Tusk page on slavery and Snaga.
.•°o.O Rent-A-Tusk O.o°•.
"Not Skilled enough to make things? Not clever enough to sell things? Sell yourself! Become a Rent-A-Tusk!"
Here's the good news! Signing up for Rent-A-Tusk is easy! Just tell your favorite Hok you want to be a Rent-A-Tusk! DONE!
Add 'Rent-A-Tusk' to your titler so people know you're available for such services.
Rent-A-Tusk jobs are generally first come, first served. So if you're looking for work, advertise your services!
Rent-A-Tusk tasks include, but are not limited to:
Walking your pet
Taste Tester
Cover your shift at work
Telling your horrible neighbor what you think of them
Deliver a package to that shop owner that smells bad
Send a message for you after you broke your foot
An escort through the swamp
Guide through the totally safe canyon
Beat up your noisy or nosy neighbor
Go on that JLE vacation package with your spouse so you don't have to
Killing Fields tour guide
Cash in that "Date with the Archon" coupon
Reserve your favorite seat at the Helheim Brothel
Fight in the Meatgrindah for you, win or lose
Sit in your CCOA class for you
Do your CCOA Homework (Passing grade for additional fee)
Sit your CCOA Exams (Passing grade for additional fee)
The possibilities are endless!