Remorseful heart

Remorseful Heart icon

Icon description - J 21, 15-17

The icon shows the meeting of Peter the Apostle with the Risen Jesus described in the Gospel of Saint John 21: 15-17.

It is Peter's meeting with Jesus within the question of love: "do you love me more than these?" Peter, at this point in his life, is before Jesus like a crushed rock, surrounded on all sides by the memory of an event in which he hears the echo of his own words: "I do not know this man" (Mk 14.71).

In the icon, we see the pensive figure of Peter, as immersed into painful memories of a spiritual trial in which he lost to his own fear. He lied not wanting to share the fate of Jesus, saying he did not know Jesus, not wanting to go where Jesus was led - to martyrdom.

Until this moment, up to this meeting with the Risen Jesus, for Peter, the life he wanted to save, unfortunately, was no longer life. It has become a Dark Night.

Jesus' resurrection changes the value of a lost life, a lost opportunity. How? Now, Jesus asks the sinner within his darkness:

"Do you love me?"

Jesus, looking deep into Peter's soul, knew that it was not a traitor that was sitting before Him, but a man lying at the bottom of the truth about himself. And this man lying at the bottom of the truth about himself, Jesus asks: "do you love me more than these?" do you love me with a love that would give her life for me and for my sheep? Peter could only answer this question with tears and whispers of a remorseful heart.

The gesture of Peter's outstretched hand towards Jesus means that the memory of his own sin does not make him want to escape into oblivion, escape from Jesus' gaze, but opens himself with all the power of feeling weak to what the merciful Jesus comes to him with.

It is worth asking the question, how to know the humanity of the sinner saved by Jesus? There is gentleness in him. It is not gentleness gained only by the enormous amount of work himself, but it is gift of gentleness - given by Jesus. It is no longer man who possesses gentleness, but gentleness possesses man. Pure Gift of the Most Holy Trinity, God who is Love, Gift for the returning son (Lk 15:11 ...)

This gentleness has one important quality - it never humiliates another person. Why? Because it is the gentleness of a remorseful man. A man who looks at reality through the glass of praying tears: "my sin is always before me" (Ps 51: 5); "Jesus, Son of the living God, have mercy on me", "Jesus, Son of the living God, have mercy on me", "Jesus, Son of the living God, have mercy on me" ...

On Easter morning, Jesus leads Peter out of his dark memories, out of guilt, out of self-accusation, out of lies. Here there is a blaze between Jesus and Peter, in which there is a light revealing a new perspective of seeing, seeing new opportunities to give Jesus a new answer.

Later, Peter the Apostle, probably from the depth of what he experienced in his relationship with Jesus after his fall, in one of his letters wrote: "love covers many sins" (1 Pet 4: 8).

The icon shows us the truth that Jesus' meeting with Peter on Easter morning is not Jesus' meeting with his traitor, but it is Jesus' meeting with a remorseful man.

The love of Jesus in a fallen man does not make him feel guilty, but instead heals a repentance for sins that creates new opportunities for a new union with God. The specialist in feeling guilty is the evil spirit, as we see in Judas; in guilt there is no room for God's mercy. There is malice. You could say that in guilt there is no oxygen to live.

We read in the Gospel of St. John, that after Jesus asked Peter three times: Do you love me? Do you love me with a love that would give life for me? Peter responds to Jesus in such a way that only humility is heard. And this means that Peter is ready to look after the Work that God began on earth - God's sheepfold, which must be led to eternity to the Father.

In the Gospel of Saint John we read: "Peter receives pastoral authority." A question arises - a reflection: what could happen if power was given to a man without a remorseful heart?

On the icon next to the figure of Jesus, sits a lamb wrapped in a warm gesture of Jesus' hand. It is a symbol that expresses the truth that for Jesus the Church is not a crowd, that the identity of the Church is built by relationships and references to this one particular man here and now. All the attention of Jesus' heart rests upon this one little lamb. The Church is not a crowd - the Church is great when she loves. Peter understands this because he is already a man with a remorseful heart. A new culture of exercising power is emerging: respect for other people.

When Peter gains power, he does not become the owner of either the sheep or the sheepfold. The humiliating chance of knowing one's own misery and sin cleared the sight of Peter the Apostle's soul. He seized the opportunity and let himself be led by the Holy Spirit into union with Jesus until he gave his life.

As a man with a remorseful heart, he was unable to understand power as a privileged life situation.

As a man with a remorseful heart he saw through the eyes of Jesus. He had one and only goal: to lead man, to lead the community of the Church with Jesus to the Father, to lead in the Holy Spirit. Peter, who lives in the depth of mystical life, follows in the Wisdom of the Holy Spirit in the footsteps of the Good Shepherd, revealing to the sheep - the Church, the eschatological perspective of the path to Life.

Peter, who leads the Church through the interior of the mystery of Jesus' Given up Body and Blood Shed to the springs of waters of life, to green pastures, where forever every Jesus' lamb, whoever "washed his garments in the blood of the Lamb" (cf. Rev 7:14) will be able to indulge in happiness and rest safely feeling loved by the Father ...

Peter, a man with a remorseful heart, did not save his life, did not make a career, but he knew and loved Love, which became for him the only key having the power to open the door to the Kingdom of Heaven in us, in the Holy Church - on earth and in eternity.

"So those redeemed by the Lord will return

and they will come to Zion with joyful singing,

with eternal happiness on their faces.

They will achieve joy and happiness;

sorrow and sighing will be gone "(Is 51:11).

"They will graze on all roads,

there will be their pasture on every treeless hill.

They will no longer crave or desire

and they will not be struck by a hot wind or the sun,

for he who pities them will lead them,

and he will lead them to the gushing spas "(Is 49: 9-10).

"Sound with joy, heavens! Rejoice, earth!

Mountains, explode with joyful cry!

For the Lord has comforted his people,

he took pity on his poor.

Zion said, "The Lord has forsaken me,

You forgot about me. "

Can a woman forget her baby,

the one who loves the son of her womb?

And even if she forgot

I will not forget you "(Is 49: 13-15).

"Because the mountains may give way

and the hills shake,

but my love will not depart from you

and my covenant of peace will not be shaken,

says the Lord who has mercy on you "(Is 54:10).