The Rubberised Turnip

Write a five minute script about a door to door salesman called Orson Spandex who is selling rubberised turnips and who has a girlfriend called Cara DeLaPotato

[Setting: A suburban neighborhood on a sunny afternoon. Orson Spandex, a door-to-door salesman dressed in a colorful spandex suit, walks up to a house and rings the doorbell.]

Orson: [to himself] Okay, Orson, time to sell some rubberised turnips. [takes a deep breath and straightens his suit as the door opens]

Homeowner: Can I help you?

Orson: Good afternoon, sir! My name is Orson Spandex, and I'm here to introduce you to the world of rubberised turnips.

Homeowner: Rubberised turnips?

Orson: Yes, sir! They're the latest innovation in vegetable preservation. Our rubberising process ensures that these turnips stay fresh and crunchy for up to six months!

ORSON BOUNCES THE TURNIP -Visual gag

Homeowner: [skeptical] I don't know. I've never heard of rubberised turnips before.

Orson: That's understandable, sir. But imagine never having to worry about your vegetables going bad again! And our turnips are also versatile – you can use them in soups, stews, and even salads.

Homeowner: [thinking it over] Well, I do like turnips. How much are they?

Orson: They're only $2 each, sir! And if you buy five, we'll throw in a sixth one for free!

Homeowner: [nodding] Okay, I'll take five.

Orson: [beaming] Excellent, sir! I'll just need your name and address for the order.

[As Orson fills out the order form, a woman walks up to the house. She's wearing a potato costume and carrying a sign that says "Potatoes are People Too!"]

Cara: Hey, Orson!

Orson: [turns to Cara and grins] Hey, Cara! What are you doing here?

Cara: [laughs] I'm just protesting the potato discrimination in the vegetable world. But what are you selling?

Orson: Rubberised turnips!

Cara: [raises an eyebrow] Rubberised turnips? That's a new one.

Orson: [defensive] Hey, they're a great product! And they're selling like hotcakes!

Cara: [teasing] I'm sure they are. So, did you make any sales today?

Orson: [proudly] I just sold five to this gentleman!

Homeowner: [interjects] And I'm happy with my purchase, thank you.

Cara: [smiling] Well done, Orson. You're the king of the turnip world.

Orson: [jokingly] That's me! Orson Spandex, turnip entrepreneur!

Homeowner: [smiling] Well, it was nice meeting you, Orson. I'll be sure to try out these rubberised turnips.

Orson: [bowing] Thank you, sir! You won't regret it.

[Orson and Cara walk away from the house, chatting and laughing.]

Cara: So, what's next on your sales route?

Orson: [checking his list] I've got a few more houses to visit. But first, how about some lunch? I'm in the mood for some potato salad.

Cara: [rolling her eyes] Very funny, Orson. But sure, let's grab a bite.

[Orson and Cara walk down the street, arm in arm, as Orson regales her with stories of his successful sales pitch.]

[End of scene]