... note(s) ...

              select ::  reflection(s)  / diary  /  quote(s) / scribble / etc   / ...

28/10: reflection(s) :: I am just back from training, in doubt whether to write or not ... but to complete my day, looking at the sky on the balcony with a smoke, why not ... life is not a joke, and to relieve a busy mind, giving expression to the flow of thought is a convenient and pleasant way to bring order and adapt to the inevitable strain ... the stress of life, and focus on what is important, including the issue(s) on my agenda, domestic task(s), meeting the demand(s) of the children, and my self-imposed moral obligation(s), that cover exercise as well as intellectual development(s), for which I have to make a choice of what to read, as a way to direct my life, bridge the gap and connect with the people around me, enjoy life, and find the time to look at the sky ...   gift: ... what is there to say, life is not a joke, so I just give it a try ... word(s) ...  

31/10: ... life goes on, at the end of the day, in doubt whether to write or not, after looking at the sky, and taking an image of the moon, I decide to give it a try, to find some rest after a busy day, reading and a walk to the city center to have a lunch with my wife, after which I continued my reading about the interpretation of dream(s) and their role in our life, my thought circle(s) around how I stand in my life, and how I distribute my time over a variety of task(s) and moral obligation(s), for which I try to find the word(s) as a means to remain in control, and to counter-act my fear of error(s), and, in a way, also my worry about money, but looking at the the girls going out to party, I can only admire their energy and power, and let's face reality, indeed I have to accept my limit(s) and find a proper role in their life, give support, and enjoy the theatre of life, which after all is also my life !   

5/11:... day after day, reading, the interpretation of dreams, a simple idea, presented in cloud(s) of word(s), but more to the point(s), an overview of our psychic life, how; word(s) might be transformed into action(s), and a view on our soul(s), hiding inspiration(s), in search of hedonic satisfaction(s), and the avoidance of pain, giving insight in what make us move ... but also in what we need in life, from a critical perspective, how to protect our children, and find value in our experience(s), by analysis and association(s), to find the line(s) that connect our thought(s), as if life is a poem, that must be read, to give it a voice, to free our mind, and adapt to the limit(s), of body and mind, in accordance with our current stage, our level of growth and the challenge(s) as present in our situation(s), from past to future !   

8/11: ... now, when I write, should I be original, or just go with the flow, and write what comes to mind, as in a game of chance, to play with the word(s), as an expression of my current mood, and an exercise in the politic(s) of thought, and the image(s) that have an impact on my vision(s) of reality, for example when I write, today I eat chicken, then, due to my tool, you will find the hidden layer of meaning(s) if you follow the link(s), which give access to the system of idea(s), that I created and later refined, with the of digital immortality as a target in my mind, just go ask cycle, as indicated by the phrase I used in many slide(s) and page(s) on my site, which provide both my intellectual background, my history, and to some extent the event(s) in my life, by way of image(), drawing(s) and writing(s) composed in the course of time, to bring order in my life and as a way to talk the walk, or in other word(s), as work that provides me with goal(s), and get the reward(s) of attention and respect !   

10/11:... what is there to say about intelligence, what about writing what about life, life goes on, and writing is a way to support my memory, gaining focus and find relief from the stress of life, the pressure of time and the demands of an agenda, as for ecample imposed by children, their social life and school issue(s), but apart from that a busy life, including the wish to write about it, is self-imposed, motivated by the need for action and self-expression, including post(s) on social media, with the hope and expectation for one or more like(s), to gain self-esteem, and as a way to find the motivation for the effort(s) to take part in life, keep up my condition by exercise, and work on my skill(s), as, indeed, a kind of therapy, for both body and mind, despite the pain, and deal with error(s), I repeat the phrase(s), go with the flow, and, of course, in case of failure try again it is a way to learn, don't stop, just go with the flow !   

12/11: ... day by day, my blood is OK, but the energy level a bit low, so I have to walk slow, fortunately not in the rain, but despite all my exercise, still with some pain, and it is hard not to complain, and not to refrain from going outdoor and walk, but when there are obligation(s), I have no choice, but to go all the way, take public transport, look at the face(s), and hear the noise, being a part of a big machine, following the crowd, and observe the busy life of the common people ... who am I that I think I can take distance from that, still in the middle of life, with wife and children, who play and study, and not to forget they eat ... in other word(s), family life, a busy agenda, and the need for support, for money, and attention, despite my desire for solitude, and the wish to retreat in silence, and live in my bubble, but without this context, I would not have a sense of self, indeed, I am not a monk, so I just find the time for a break to write a bit, and move on, take life as a dream, fly and sing my song !   

14/11: ... what is the science behind fighting, in the literature it is called the sweet science, which might be a joke, but from what background is hard to tell, ... another question is what is the science behind writing, there is no clear answer, and somehow it is best expressed with a play of word(s), to adapt to the flow of mind in a trail of thoughts that connect by arbitrary link(s) and express, one way or another, the force(s) that impact our vision(s), and attitude(s), which we look at as challenge(s) that confront us and require an answer in the form of action(s), either in reality or in our imagination, using the mind(s) eye to act, and change our experience(s), either as an experiment or from an unknown source, our soul, the origin of how we look at life and manage our sense of self, indeed with a game of word(s), write and fight, to go with the flow and enjoy the theatre of life, in the daily obligation(s) and challenge(s) of domestic and social life in a modern context, just go for it !   

16/11:... one of my daily tasks seems to be to write a bit, just for the fun of it, or more likely, to improve my skill(s), be productive and reflect on the issue(s) in my life, take some distance, and create self-esteem with a game of word(s), as a way to face reality, an exercise to practice my habit(s), to talk my way out of it, as the intellectual outsider, I observe and look for a posture, take a few breath(s) and give my comments), to assess my role(s), and take position in what goes on, either a conversation, a debate or in conflict(s), to act as a guide on the side, and wait for the result(s), in hope of the reward(s) for my presence and contribution(s), as a moral force, with an impact on whatever problem( s) and dilemma(s) at hand, that is to act as a mediator for example in domestic affair(s), issue(s) with the children, to find balance and rest, in a system of politic(s) ...