15AR20-34

AR 20:34 - Open relationships, cheating ... and, consequences

Apologia Report 20:34 (1,263)

October 1, 2015

In this issue:

MARRIAGE - measuring the incidence of infidelity

WIKIPEDIA - "you should not make changes on a page about you," because "you are very biased"

WORLD RELIGIONS - an attempt to describe "the failure of American religious education"

PLEASE NOTE: Our office will be closed from Oct. 6th to Oct. 14th. We will resume Apologia Report publication the week of October 18.

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MARRIAGE

"Midwest Leads the Nation in Marital Fidelity" by Heidi Stevens (Tribune News) -- begins: "Midwesterners are less likely than people from other regions to cheat on their partners, according to a new survey on dating and marriage that covers everything from prenuptial agreements to open relationships - and everything in between.

"The survey, sponsored by Avvo, an online attorney directory, asked 2,001 married and unmarried adults a series of questions about their relationship attitudes, in an attempt to understand some of the issues that typically send people in search of legal advice.

"'I think one thing we're seeing is the customization of marriage, where people kind of set it up the way they want - and that's a good thing,' said noted sexologist Pepper Schwartz, professor of sociology at the University of Washington, who consulted with Avvo on the question selection and the interpretation of the data."

In the Midwest, "just 10 percent of all Midwesterners reporting they've had sexual relations with someone outside of their relationship, and just 7 percent of married Midwesterners saying so. That compares with 16 percent of all Northeasterners, 17 percent of Southerners and 20 percent of people who live in the West. ...

"'[T]hey tend to be more stable,' Schwartz said. 'That has a conservatizing influence. If you're around all people you know, if you're still friends with the people you went to high school with, that makes a big difference.' ...

"Sixteen percent of all Americans admit having cheated on their current partner, with 20 percent of men and 13 percent of women admitting to outside-the-relationship dalliances.

"A significant number of people wouldn't necessarily leave a partner who proposed an open relationship. Forty-five percent of respondents said they 'would not leave' or 'might or might not leave' if their partner wanted to sleep with other people, while 55 percent of people said it would be a relationship deal breaker.

"Forty-six percent said they 'aren't morally opposed' or are 'somewhat neutral' to the idea of open relationships. Fifty-four percent are morally opposed.

"'Many of these men and women have already had a number of partners,' Schwartz said. 'So they can grasp how sex outside the relationship can happen, and it doesn't necessarily mean you don't love your partner. They can understand a wandering eye.'

"Then again, just 4 percent of all Americans say they've had or are having an open relationship.

"Prenuptial agreements remain rare in America - the survey says just 2 percent of Americans have them. But most people aren't opposed to them: Just 20 percent of male respondents and 19 percent of female respondents said that if their partner asked for a prenup, they would doubt their partner's feelings for them.

"Slightly more than half of Americans believe in staying together even when the romance is gone from a marriage. When asked whether they agree or disagree with the statement, 'Just because the spark is gone in a marriage doesn't mean you should get a divorce,' 51 percent of respondents agreed. Broken down by gender, 50 percent of men agreed with the statement, while 53 percent of women agreed.

"Finally, a full 70 percent of Americans reported being 'very satisfied' in their relationships, and 24 percent said they're 'somewhat satisfied,' leaving just 5 percent who said they're 'not very satisfied' and 1 percent who are 'not at all satisfied.'" Pueblo Chieftain, Aug 10 '15, p7A. <www.goo.gl/atIk8A>

It remains a mildly amusing irony that those who subscribe to relaxed marriage standards still express volcanic outrage after finding their partner is cheating on them. When one gives temptation freedom, unpleasant consequence tend to show up.

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WIKIPEDIA

It is not unusual for disputes regarding Wikipedia content to devolve into claims of conspiracy. In her article for Skeptical Inquirer, "Is Wikipedia a Conspiracy?," Susan Gerbic, "leader of the Guerrilla Skepticism on Wikipedia project," reports that with almost every opportunity she hears "the story of someone who attempted to edit Wikipedia" only to have their work deleted. "Often I hear that they were suspended or banned from editing Wikipedia. Often they tell the story as if it is evidence of a conspiracy" to control Wikipedia content.

Gerbic's response begins with the simple reminder: "Wikipedia has rules." People don't seem to understand that "you don't own a Wikipedia page ... once you publish the page and it's live, it's fair game. Anyone can make edits. Large changes should be discussed on the talk page first, but you have no recourse once it is determined that changes should be made. ...

"What most people do not realize is that even if your name is on the title page, *it is not your page.* It is a page *about* you, but you are very biased and should not make changes. If there is a problem with factual information, you can make a comment on the 'talk page' asking for the change to be made and giving strong reasons along with a citation to substantiate the change." (Imagine having to give a citation for defending the claim that you do not beat your wife. - RP)

"We see trolls and well-meaning editors vandalize Wikipedia all the time. ...

"One woman who had just attended the Reason Rally contacted me several years ago. From the hotel room the next day she had attempted to edit the brand new Reason Rally Wikipedia page. What people don't realize is that editors rarely use primary sources. Since it had only been one day, the only noteworthy secondary sources to come out were from Christian reporters writing in Christian news outlets. Of course their coverage was biased by their point of view. ...

"Wikipedia is the sixth-most viewed website in the world. It is the closest thing we have to a repository of all knowledge. ...

"It is our responsibility to make sure the answers [users] are getting are the closest we can get to being accurate. This is the goal of the Guerrilla Skepticism on Wikipedia project." Skeptical Inquirer, Sep/Oct '15, p52-3.

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WORLD RELIGIONS

Faith Ed.: Teaching About Religion in an Age of Intolerance, by Linda K. Wertheimer [1] -- Naomi Schaefer Riley leads her review with the seemingly rhetorical question, "Is it possible to study world religions in today's climate? ...

"In Faith Ed., Linda K. Wertheimer, the former education editor of The Boston Globe, explores ... how little Americans know about one another's religious beliefs and practices and how difficult it will be to remedy that - given the cultural sensitivities and legal land mines in our way. ...

"Wertheimer repeatedly deplores ignorant parents who criticize schools for attempting to provide religious education - she seems to play down the question of having a guest speaker who had said Hezbollah was not a terrorist organization (though he later recanted). She also implies that people overreacted when a group of public-school boys taken to tour a mosque were videotaped praying there. But Wertheimer herself can be quick on the trigger. She criticizes a Christian elementary-school teacher who was giving a lesson about Judaism for mispronouncing the word 'Seder,' even asking the superintendent if he was concerned about this. She also felt uncomfortable when her son blurted out 'God is the clouds' in front of his preschool classmates. ...

"Much of American religious illiteracy stems from the failure of our religious education. If we don't understand holy books, prayer, religious interpretation and ritual in our own lives, how can we understand them in other people's?" New York Times Book Review, Aug 23 '15, p18. <www.goo.gl/K7yi0W>

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SOURCES: Monographs

1 - Faith Ed.: Teaching About Religion in an Age of Intolerance, by Linda K. Wertheimer (Beacon, 2015, hardcover, 240 pages) <www.goo.gl/lW42eZ>

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