Greg Jolly

My name is Gregory Jolly and I am 25 years old. I currently work for the Canadian Armed Forces. I originally grew up in Woodstock, Ontario until I joined the military in 2016. I attend The Salvation Army Edmonton Temple and play cornet in the brass band. I've been involved in music since I was seven and now I play, learn, and even teach younger students to read and play music.

I first applied for the Infantry in the Canadian Armed Forces back in 2015 after being finished high school for a couple of years. By then, the war in Afghanistan had concluded and they wanted to reduce the number of infantry. They raised the bar for test results to limit the number of applications being processed. The day of my written test, I sat down and I felt confident that I was going to pass. After the test, everyone who wrote it sat in the waiting room waiting to be called one at a time to go over the results and discuss their next steps. As I sat there waiting, they continued to call out names and those of us who were waiting became fewer and fewer. I started doubting myself and thinking I had failed. Eventually, I was the last one in the waiting room and I sat there alone for what felt like forever. I concluded to myself that I had failed and was not going to be processed. That felt like a kick to the gut. I finally got called into the office and the officer behind the desk explained to me that the bar for infantrymen has been raised to reduce number of recruits and that I have to wait a minimum of three months before rewriting the test. I tried to walk out with my head held high but I just couldn't. I felt like I was walking away from my dream because I wasn't good enough.

People would ask how I did and I just hated the feeling of telling them that I did not pass. I didn't do anything for the next few months because I felt like a failure. All I did was continue to work at my night-job. I was nervous to go back and try the test again - only to fail. I started working out more to improve myself. For months and months people would ask me what my next step was with applying to the military. I would tell them the same thing, that I needed to study for the test and then call them back to schedule a retest. I kept saying these words, but never actually acted on them - it was just to make people think I had a plan. One day I told that lie to one of my friends and he grabbed me by the shoulders and said "stop saying it and go do it!" Those words hit me deep and almost a year after my first attempt, I called the recruiter and asked for a retest. Not long after that phone call I got an email telling me that my test scores were good enough for me to proceed without doing a retest. I was filled with joy and relief because I really didn't want to redo the test and stress about passing or not.

If at first you don't succeed, step back, regroup, and set your mind straight from any lingering doubts you have about yourself and go at it again. Sometimes we need to prepare more to succeed at something. Sometimes we could do all the preparation possible and still fail. Things don't always go the way we would like them to, and sometimes it will bring us down to the point of giving up. It's not uncommon to feel like this. It's the difference between living in that moment for the rest of your life or pushing past it and trying again. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. The Beatles were told when they first started out that they won't make it in music. Sometimes we need failure and hardship to bring us down a notch so we can turn around and bounce back better than we were before. When I went through the application process for the military I felt more prepared all around than I did when I first applied.

We have two choices in life: Do or Don't. We can either go out and make our dreams come true and help improve the world or we can sit back and think of the "What if" questions and not make any changes in our lives.

The Navy SEALs created simple techniques to help improve your mental toughness. The techniques are called "The Big Four" and it has four parts.

1. Goal Setting

When we are in a stressful situation, our emotions, fears, and stress are all in chaos. Goal setting is thinking of something positive in the future (In the near future, if possible). Thinking of positive things such as: Family, Friends, and other important things serves as an anchor. Projecting yourself in a positive future is key with this.

2. Visualization or Mental Rehearsal

This is when you continuously run an activity in your mind. Rehearsing situations in your mind is like rehearsing for a job interview or a sporting event. When the real deal occurs, you'll be better prepared to tackle it. Confront a bad situation over and over again in your mind and it will come naturally when you face it for real. Many public speakers do this.

3. Self Talk

We all talk to ourselves everyday. So when we talk to ourselves, make it positive talk. Talking to yourself in a positive way helps reduce stress and any bad vibes you may have.

4. Tactical Breathing

This is more of an exercise but it helps. You focus on your breathing and requires you to breathe slower to help counteract some of the effects of panic. It also helps lower a racing heart beat.

Long inhales to help provide more oxygen to the brain which helps you focus and make better judgments.

Long exhales mimic the process of relaxation within the body.

When we fail at something or something doesn't go our way. Don't sit and think about it and do nothing like I did. Get your head straight and start to improve yourself so you're more prepared for it a second time. "Everything is possible for one who believes" Mark 9:23