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Shore-o-Scopes

Libra

September 23-October 22

This is a time of withdrawal and introspection.

A little self-discipline goes a long way.

Scorpio

October 23-November 22

September is the perfect month to clear and clean-up stagnant emotional and spiritual energy. Positive, lucky energy is with you for networking and support.

Sagittarius

November 23-December 21

September can be an inspiring time to connect with others or dream up satisfying plans for the future. You’re in good shape for pouring energy into various aspects of your life.

Capricorn

December 22-January 19th

Dear Capricorn, you will start to experience light at the end of the tunnel and recognition for a job well done this month. Stay mindful and reflect on recent decisions.

Aquarius

January 20-February 18

Keep pushing boundaries and focus on your needs. You feel confident as you gain more self-reliance, and learning something new and valuable to your life can be rewarding.

Pisces

February 19th-March 20

This is an excellent time for making discoveries about your true feelings. Energy flows well for relationships and creative pursuits.

Aries

March 21-April 19

Keep your head up, dear Aries, and try not to get caught up in negative relationships at the end of the month.

Taurus

April 20-May 20

This could be the start of a beautiful chapter. Expect universal outcomes for your work and keep your head up.

Gemini

May 21-June 20

Put effort into hobbies and creative pursuits you genuinely enjoy without being impatient with yourself. Pace yourself, as balance and moderation are critical.

Cancer

June 21-July 22

Continue focusing on building closer relationships with your loved ones. Step into your comfort zone for a while! A focus on letting go of excess helps clear the path ahead.

Leo

July 23-August 22

It’s an excellent time to exchange ideas, learn new things, and connect with others. Revelations are your asset this month, so try to pay close attention to new information and emotions.

Virgo

August 23-September 22

It’s your yearly opportunity to begin anew, start fresh, and reinvent yourself. With work and business this month, a winning attitude attracts favorable circumstances.

Shy Sophomore Seeks Advice

Hi Spectrum Staff,

I’m a shy sophomore who’s looking for a date for homecoming. I don’t have any girlfriends-- I mean, friends who are girls-- but I’d really like to take someone. Last year, we didn’t get to have a homecoming so I didn’t get to make a move, but I’m planning on doing a big proposal to this really pretty girl in the commons. She’s in my math class and said “thank you” when she borrowed my calculator once, so I know she’s into me. Recently, I’ve been having second thoughts about my public proposal… so I wanted to know: should I ask or not?

Sincerely,

Very Down Bad

Hi Very Down Bad,

Hi, wow thank you so much for your submission. It’s been so long since I’ve had the pleasure of giving somebody advice. I think your proposal sounds like an absolutely amazing idea. You think big and I like that. A public proposal like yours is guaranteed to win over any girl’s heart - so you’ve got this in the bag! You only live once, so don’t second guess yourself. Can’t wait to see your hoco pictures. <3

Lots of love,

Overwhelmingly Optimistic

Very Down Bad,

I am so glad you wrote to us. We have saved you and this poor girl from the clutches of mortifying and permanent embarrassment. Very Down Bad, I’m going to need you to reconsider your interactions with this girl. Maybe you guys are just... better off as friends? Maybe you just aren’t ready for a relationship of this kind? I’m sure you have many friends you could go with instead.

Actually, you know what, I’ll just tell it to you straight. NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT. She doesn’t want your calculator or your proposal, big man. Try again next year.

Good luck in your future endeavors,

Perfectly Pessimistic