preface

black diary -- a story of choice

To fight the demons of the past, the fear for future disaster and to maintain my freedom, in the face of a dominant young wife, just turned 40, and to increasingly dominant children, age 10 and 6, I will open my black diary, to reflect on ongoing issues, describe the dilemmas, and just write in order to find rational solutions, to cope with real or imagined problems.

Having such a diary will give me the opportunity to take emotional distance, while staying rational in the middle (is that a proper word?) of the situation, in particular when these situations pose issues with repect to my identy, self-image, ability to cope with challenges, and fight any possible fear of failure.

I might even use the material for public writing, if needed, to establish my future fame, and reinforce my (digital) immortality by means of (virtual) poetry.