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10:00am >> The Hidden Power of Smiling | Ron Gutman

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Speaker 1 0:42

Good morning everyone and welcome to ask the neighbor. I'm your host and CO sitter offski. It is February the second and we are here with DJ Chubb QA. Looks like the snow is just about starting over here. And we're looking to have a good show. I hope everyone's doing well. I hope you're ready, you're prepared. And you want to give us a call 248557 3300 We're going to start it off with some Jay Geils Here we go.

Unknown Speaker 1:10

Hold on the song has little introduction to it. And it's supposed to be sad though, you might feel it that way. It's a song about desperation every now and then we do get desperate. This is a song about L O V. And if you abuse it, you're going to lose it and you lose it to go and use it and your abuser Django be able to choose it because you ain't gonna have it further on down the line things won't be so fine. You're gonna be sitting there on your little machine trying to look and keep it clean. You won't be playing bingo all night all alone. That's why you're sitting there by the telephone. And you know that she ain't going to call you so you put on the TV and you're watching Johnny Carson segwaying right into tomorrow's show but that don't got to go see your turn and often turn on the radio to radio don't seem to get the click so you say hey man, I can look at the split. You start to open up a little book and there's something there you got overlooked and say baby, you don't have something Oh my man said baby this summer, man. I know that you're home and I know you ain't Oh no. So you start walking over to a house to get over to a house you walk over to a door he's got power now the golf

Unknown Speaker 2:14

the golf pitches will Google the green tea

Unknown Speaker 2:22

Well, she opens up the door and then you just kind of walk up doomsday baby. You look up way up in agreement Scarran you say oh my darling. You know her me was that the party's friends do not believe what they say that's only got something that turn you down the wives crack alive. Say down

Unknown Speaker 2:46

take your big curls and just squeeze them down the Toba. What's the name of that chick with the long hair? Rapunzel, Rapunzel. Hey repute the beauty of the beautiful hair and beauty the beautifully Madonna and glamour because there's a wolf of Gouveia saying to you know comes once and when it comes to grab it fast because sometimes love you grabbing going to last and I believe I

Unknown Speaker 3:10

must you know I think I must you know maybe I think I must be laughing I must I must

Unknown Speaker 3:34

seem like a low can how can I be so glad that I led you don't know why I let you leave says How come the guy lost give away be sweet Mr Gallow Missouri guy lost muscle got lost somewhere down the line the guy lost I got loads girl giveaway somewhere down the line Good day

Speaker 1 6:33

give up you're not gonna hear that everywhere. Thank you DJ.

Unknown Speaker 7:42

Yeah, the Jay Geils Band must have got last lie. All right,

Speaker 1 7:46

you're listening to WNZ K 698 FM. Ask the neighbor is the show. I'm your host Danko sinner offski and we're here with DJ Chubb, ca. Thank you everyone for tuning in on this gloomy, gloomy day and figured we started up with a little Jay Geils Band from way back when actually that was live in Detroit I believe. I want to say thank you to Louis Tire Service 317 East Eight Mile Road 248-542-0930 Lewis Tire Service conveniently located on eight mile road just west of I 75 let them know ask the neighbor sent you and you'll get half off of your tire repair. Thank you to father's justice law. 313-819-9176 father's justice law is there if you have any family law concerns, give them a call to 43138199176 Thank you to tech solutions consultants calm Rene Carcetti can help you navigate these times these financial times that we're in to 485663362 That's tax solutions consultants renaker chatty 248566336 To thank you to Detroit bold coffee calm, boldly brewed in Motown with flavors like nightmare black, and the Woodward blend available at Myers available at Kroger available lots of places but you can also buy them online and get a discount when you put in the very Detroit promo code. That's all lowercase all one word very Detroit, put that into the Detroit bold coffee.com website and you're going to get yourself a discount. Thank you to kebab island.com 586-751-7511 Check out their menu, make an order, give them a call 586-751-7511 Let them know ask the neighbor sent you and you'll get 10% off your meal. Thank you to Troy jewelers located on Rochester road between big Beaver and waddles to 485280962 That's Troy jewellers to 485280962 Alright, folks, we are looking for callers but meanwhile we're going to go on If we don't we have a caller on the line right now but I'm not sure what do we have here? We got a caller. Okay, all right. What's up, David? Yeah, good morning. Good morning my man. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 10:15

we better get ready. Yeah, go out and get a snow shovel.

Speaker 1 10:18

All right, you didn't get one yet. You don't have a snow shovel yet.

Unknown Speaker 10:23

Now I gotta go down there and hopefully got the up market got one.

Speaker 1 10:28

Well, I hope so. I know that a lot of places were selling out all that stuff.

Unknown Speaker 10:33

Yeah, that's what I was. I was. I was busy yesterday, and I just can't believe everything so expensive anymore. I guess I can't believe it.

Speaker 1 10:46

Well, I guess what did you What did you see? That was so expensive yesterday.

Unknown Speaker 10:52

Oh, man. Get a gallon milk.

Speaker 1 10:56

Man. Yeah. We're at downtown you know that store? Number? Oh, yeah.

Oh, man. Oh, well, you got to stay away from them stores. I tell you they get you pretty bad. Where's the closest grocery store to you? Ah, Lafayette market. Okay. All right. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 11:22

Yeah. kitty corner from 1300. Uh huh. Big Big Bill. Oh,

Speaker 1 11:31

yeah, I know that market. Yeah, I know. That you know what? I don't.

Unknown Speaker 11:39

I don't actually I go and I should use my head. And I didn't know Billy K. Dylan K already. marquees are every day. That's why I'm gonna try to make it over there. Get ready for this.

Speaker 1 11:56

Yeah, I know. It's it's, it's looking crazy out there. It looks wild out there right now. I don't know. It's wild. Yeah. What do we got to do? Well, we're gonna we're gonna get through it. That's what we're gonna do. We're gonna get through this. Oh, we got to Oh, yeah. Yeah. Help your neighbors out. Everyone out there. If you can grab a shovel do what David's doing. See if you can help a neighbor out. See who's needs some help out there. knock on some doors. Whatever they need. Help them out. Be a good neighbor out there today.

Unknown Speaker 12:31

Danko Did you get any pictures at the Tokyo lounge of anybody?

Unknown Speaker 12:37

Oh,

Speaker 1 12:40

I really didn't. Rodney Pearson Might have took a couple pictures. But I'll have to check with them. I'll have to check with them.

Unknown Speaker 12:50

I didn't make it out there. I didn't make it me as a DJ. We didn't make it.

Speaker 1 12:55

Well, hey, next, next, next time around. We're gonna have to make sure everybody gets there. And make sure you stay safe.

Unknown Speaker 13:04

Hey, can you do can you do the chipmunks Love Me Tender. Oh, yeah. I don't believe. I like to hear that. Right. All right. Thank

Speaker 1 13:22

you, David. Always good to hear your voice. Thank you for calling. Hey. Do what you gotta do. That's right. Yep. There you go. There you go. My man. Good, David. Thank you for the call. All right. All right. All right. Now we're gonna go to a TED talk really quick, if we can.

Unknown Speaker 13:47

When I was 27 years old, I left a very demanding job in management consulting, for a job that was even more demanding teaching. I went to teach seventh graders math in the New York City public schools. And like any teacher, I made quizzes and tests, I gave out homework assignments. When the work came back, I calculated grades. What struck me was that IQ was not the only difference between my best and my worst students. Some of my strongest performers did not have stratospheric IQ scores. Some of my smartest kids weren't doing so well. And that got me thinking kinds of things you need to learn in seventh grade math. Sure, they're hard ratios decimals, the area of a parallelogram, but these concepts are not impossible. And I was firmly convinced that every one of my students could learn the material if they worked hard and long enough. After several more years of teaching, I came to the conclusion that what we need in education is a much better understanding of society. and learning from a motivational perspective, from a psychological perspective. In education, the one thing we know how to measure best is IQ. But what if doing well in school and in life depends on much more than your ability to learn quickly and easily. So I left the classroom, and then went to graduate school to become a psychologist. I started studying kids and adults in all kinds of super challenging settings. And in every study, my question was, who is successful here and why? My research team and I went to West Point Military Academy, we tried to predict which cadets would stay in military training, and which would drop out, we went to the National Spelling Bee, and tried to predict which children would advance farthest in competition. We studied rookie teachers working in really tough neighborhoods, asking which teachers are still going to be here in teaching by the end of the school year, and of those who will be the most effective at improving learning outcomes for their students. We partnered with private companies asking which of these salespeople is going to keep their jobs and who's going to earn the most money in all those very different contexts. One characteristic emerged as a significant predictor of success. And it wasn't social intelligence wasn't good looks, physical health, and it wasn't IQ. It was grit. Grit is passion and perseverance for very long term goals. Grit is having stamina. Grit is sticking with your future, day in day out, not just for the week, not just for the month, but for years, and working really hard to make that future a reality. Grit is living life like it's a marathon, not a sprint. A few years ago, I started studying grit in the Chicago Public Schools. I asked 1000s of high school juniors to take grit questionnaires, and then weed it around more than a year to see who would graduate. Turns out that grittier kids were significantly more likely to graduate. Even when I match them on every characteristic, I could measure, things like family income, standardized achievement test scores, even How Safe Kids felt when they were at school. So it's not just at West Point, or the National Spelling Bee that grip matters. It's also in school, especially for kids at risk for dropping out. To me, the most shocking thing about grit is how little we know how little science knows about building it. Every day parents and teachers asked me, How do I build grit in kids? What do I do to teach kids a solid work ethic? How do I keep them motivated for the long run? The honest answer is, I don't know. What I do know is that talent doesn't make you gritty. Our data show very clearly, that there are many talented individuals who simply do not follow through on their commitments. In fact, in our data, grit is usually unrelated, or even inversely related to measures of talent.

Unknown Speaker 18:27

So far, the best idea I've heard about building grit in kids is something called growth mindset. This is an idea developed at Stanford University by Carol Dweck. And it is the belief that the ability to learn is not fixed, that it can change with your effort. Dr. Dweck has shown that when kids read and learn about the brain, and how it changes and grows in response to challenge, they're much more likely to persevere when they fail, because they don't believe that failure is a permanent condition. So growth mindset is a great idea for building grit. But we need more. And that's where I'm going to end my remarks because that's where we are. That's the work that stands before us. We need to take our best ideas are strongest intuitions, and we need to test them. We need to measure whether we've been successful, and we have to be willing to fail to be wrong to start over again with lessons learned. In other words, we need to be gritty about getting our kids grittier. Thank you.

Unknown Speaker 19:40

All right, DJ. Yeah, that was grit, the power of passion and perseverance and it was Angela. Lee Duckworth.

Speaker 1 19:47

Excellent. Thank you so much for that. You're listening to WNZK as the neighbor is the program, I'm your host Danko sodroski with DJ chub coming to you every day Monday through Friday 9am until 11am except on Thursdays till 10am Right now we've got Dr. biter on the line. Good morning, Doctor biter.

Unknown Speaker 20:06

Hey, good morning Danko. How are you?

Speaker 1 20:09

Pretty good, pretty good. We're just kind of moving in slowly into the show here and looking outside the window, and it's kind of gloomy, and people are a little bit panicking. I was at the grocery store yesterday, there was lines everywhere, people are flipping out. What's happened to our society, Doc, everybody's in a panic all the time.

Unknown Speaker 20:32

Yeah, everybody wants to react to their world, as opposed to creating, I mean, remember, everybody creates their own reality, that really the world you want to create for yourself,

Speaker 1 20:43

right of scarcity and this constant fear of not having enough to survive. And it's interesting, though, how it's, you know, how we can easily be adjusted to do those kinds of things. Sometimes, you know, it's like, you know, toilet paper, we're gonna be out of toilet paper, unless you get some right away, and you're not gonna be able to get any for so long. And then people start to flip out and other people start telling other people and next thing, you know, there's a toilet paper shortage, and everybody's got tons of it. Exactly. So. So, what are your plans for the day? Are you staying inside? What are you gonna do, Doc?

Unknown Speaker 21:28

Well, funny, you should ask, we just got back from my wife and I went to the, we have one of those super Kroger's, where we live, so we walk 45 minutes on the interior side of the store, and are walking for the day. Cool. So just making the best of it.

Speaker 1 21:45

Yeah. How was so how was the crowd there? Was there a lot of people or was it? No, no,

Unknown Speaker 21:51

it was pretty empty. I mean, it was all the employees stocking shelves and stuff like that. So we had a pretty clear run of the place, you know, takes us about three minutes to walk around the entire interior. So we get a few rounds, and then we buy a couple groceries.

Speaker 1 22:07

Oh, that's cool. That's good that you have something so close to you like that, that you can do that. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 22:13

And a Home Depot. For those that live close to a mall. I mean, why not? The malls are set up for you to walk in and stuff.

Speaker 1 22:20

And they're huge, right? If you can, why not enjoy them all take a walk and get out a little bit, maybe you'll bump into somebody, maybe you'll have a conversation with someone. And, you know, maybe a little smile will come out of the day if you interact a little bit. So what are some other things we can do to interact? Doc? I feel like we're losing our abilities to interact with people.

Unknown Speaker 22:44

Yeah, I mean, it takes a conscious effort, right? You gotta make sure that that that becomes part of your daily routine, as it were, you know, how can I reach out to somebody to help make their day because you'll make yours as well. But you know, they're, I mean, I don't know, everyone knows somebody, but somebody that's kind of like, older can't get out? Right? You know, wouldn't they love to hear from someone who said, hey, just thinking about you just hope you're doing okay. type of thing,

Speaker 1 23:16

right? Yeah, a little phone call can do wonders. On a day like today or any day really, for someone just to say hello, and just thinking about you. Do you need anything? And can I help you or something along those lines? is a great thing to do today, if you can pick up the phone. I know. Looks like a lot of people are taking the day off. It feels like

Unknown Speaker 23:39

Yeah, I mean, the forecast certainly was pretty dire. Yeah, given us plenty of warning, right? You know what, we were out there and I'm only speaking for the area I live in, but I just thought like, if we're gonna get like over a foot of snow, then it should be those big, fat fluffy flakes, you know, coming down. Uh huh. But it really wasn't. It's just those little ones. I mean, they're steady, but they're little, I don't know, it's still above freezing. So.

Speaker 1 24:04

Right. We'll see what happens. I mean, it's always interesting because, you know, people just flipped out they're buying snowblowers they're buying the biggest shovels they're all flipping out, reacting and freaking out. And we'll see what happens. It's just so interesting to watch people as they go through like panic situations because you know, there's so many ways to take care of your snow and the shovel you got probably will be fine. And you know, might not justify going to get a snowblower just for one snowfall, because we haven't had a lot of snow and you know what I mean? Like people used to buy snowblowers but they're not buying them like they used to because they it doesn't snow like it used to. Yeah, right. So, but you're from you're from Pittsburgh originally, right, doc?

Unknown Speaker 24:52

I am. I am. So Pittsburgh gets a lot of snow too. I remember the one year my son was in was moved out of the house yet, but we got a blizzard. And wow, like over two feet of snow. Oh, that was quite the adventure.

Speaker 1 25:11

Yeah. What do you miss about Pittsburgh? What do you miss about Pittsburgh?

Unknown Speaker 25:17

Well, certainly, I used to live on my Washington, which is it overlooks the city. So like my walk, and that's actually my, my wife, Renee got me started on walking. We were, you know, just dating at the time, and then she'd come visit me and then we'd walk on into Grandview to the other. And that's how I got started. That's actually how I even studied for my psychology exam. I put on a pair of headphones, and then I just, you know, got up early in the morning, and then when I walk in, and then I listen, I'm an auditory learner. So it was pretty nice for me to just be able to listen and learn. Oh, I use that time even when she wasn't there. You know, to study I called it and it worked out fine,

Speaker 1 26:03

man. So blocking blocking is a huge thing. And they had that in the in in the day they had like a Walkman. Probably what you were using?

Unknown Speaker 26:15

Yeah, yeah. You will actually, you know been around, you know, put it on a playlist and then listen to

Speaker 1 26:28

Well, I mean, honestly, like you think about the technology. Yeah, you know, this this phone business has only been around so many years, you know, and the ability to do what we do now with the phones has been around for even less you know, it's been pretty interesting ride watching this technology, develop the phones and how we were before and how our society has changed and all the kids are inside the house now and they're not outside playing like they should be with their other friends. And I hope they get out I hope kids get out when this when the snow hits and get out there and do some whatever out in the snow. You know what I mean? Like when a snowfall was coming. When I was a kid I was all geeked up and pumped up to get out there and enjoy the weather. But even that seems weird. Nowadays, people are not going out as much in the snow and enjoying the weather. You finding that duck?

Unknown Speaker 27:28

Yeah, I mean, it here's the kind of an interesting thing. So I live on a lake and one of our neighbors this past Sunday had had had a cookout. Oh, wow, the lakes frozen. So he put out some cinder blocks. And he put a little fire ring out there. So he had a fire gone. And then he had his grill out there. So he invited the neighborhood. For for chicken, you know, and and so it was in everybody kind of came not everybody. But you know, people that had snowmobiles came in those. And they came in the little four wheelers that you can drive on ice and stuff like that Fun, fun. But again, it was trying to, again, create a social environment for people to interact.

Speaker 1 28:12

Right, right, in the middle of winter, right? There you go in a place that you wouldn't think that you would be doing that? You can? You can? Exactly. So there's there's always so many different ways that we can create those environments. But, you know, it's a mindset to dock like, because we're just human beings, right? There's energy that has to go into planning, preparing, doing these things. And I think as humans, sometimes you justify yourself out of some of those things.

Unknown Speaker 28:46

Yeah, yeah. As my wife says, it's easier just to stay home in the warm in the warm, you know, atmosphere as opposed to going out. But again, just to make the effort, you know, I always think, you know, Marshall, Goldsmith spoke, you know, what got you here won't get you there. At the very end of the book, he asked you to think about, if you were like, I don't know, 90 some years old or something on your deathbed, and you could talk to the person that's living today, what advice would you give them? So if you put it into that perspective, would you would that person say, you know, I think you should sequester yourself in the house and stay away from everybody and don't interact with anyone. I don't think you'd probably tell yourself that. No, you probably say, you know, try to make some connections, you know, bring a little joy to other people's lives. And you can do that pretty easily by just kind of getting out there.

Speaker 1 29:37

Well, it seems like it's not so easy. Some people are shy about doing it. You know, I mean, there's some, some, a little bit of hesitation to get out there. But I think once you do get out there to help whoever you can. I think it starts to make you feel better and you start opening up other doors that you you can make more connections and open up more social opportunities. Yeah, so even going to the mall is a way to expand, you know, a possible social connectivity. You know, during these times, Doc, everyone's been inside people have not had the social connectivity that they had before. And it's, you know, everyone's trying to get back out there back to being where they were comfortable with their family and friends. And, you know, like you said, it's easier to not engage or not have people over or not making invite or not go somewhere. But in the end, you need it for your own mental health, right? That's where we have to, like, push ourselves a little bit Doc, I feel to do more networking, do more social connectivity, do more of these things, even though it's easier to just watch Netflix or whatever.

Unknown Speaker 31:00

Right? But I mean, I think you make a good point, like, you know, if you look at it, from the perspective, it's like, this is for my house, you know, my mental health, yeah, like, you know, are you are you making an effort every day to stay healthy. So what you know, and you could be asking yourself, and you know, even today is kind of like, it's gonna provide some unique opportunities, because you can, if you have a snow shovel, when you can go out there and help your neighbor, right, you could do a little bit of, you know, random act of kindness right there,

Speaker 1 31:34

there you go, you can just help out somebody that you know, or don't know, and get out there and share a little bit of love. And if you got a shovel, or even and I thought you were gonna say, you know, this is a great opportunity today, while everybody's home is to give, you know, give some people that you love a call, and let them know that you're thinking about them and, and wherever they are in the country, this is a good time for yourself to get back and say, hey, you know what, I'm kind of laying low today, there's not a lot of stuff going on, I'm snowed in, I just wanted to say hi to my, my cousins, my aunts or whoever it may be. And it's a good time to do that. And that just expands your fold, and makes you know, your social connections stronger. And that's really a big deal. And I think that, you know, our next challenge is going to be you know, re reconnecting that social fabric that we had before. And, you know, everything that we do doc, even like the restaurants that we visited before. Now, you know, maybe there's less people in the restaurants creates a different environment, going to plays, you know, what isn't like it used to be you have to sit further away. There's anxiety about that, and being around a lot of people, somebody sneezes, everybody flips out, you know what I mean? And so, it's just, that's how it is, right? I see. He's, I thought he was gonna, like, get kicked me out of the store, you know, it was wild.

Unknown Speaker 33:10

Yeah, I totally understand

Speaker 1 33:13

that. So it's like, twice. Trouble. Everybody looks at you like from across the store, you know, it'll see. Yeah, and, but here we are, you know, a couple years after doing this, and it, you know, we've come out of it. And hopefully, we can reconnect the parts and pieces of our lives that we enjoyed, and the parts and pieces that maybe we didn't want to reconnect, we're not going to connect back up. Right, you know, put more energy into the positives of what you can connect with. And so what are some other tip, what's another tip doc to expand our social connectivity?

Unknown Speaker 34:02

Well, I mean, you know, social media is, you know, the All right. I mean, everybody does it, everybody knows about it, right? So but can you use it in a way that number one that you know that you don't become obsessed with it? Right, and that you're trying to, you know, compare yourself to everybody else to it. I would say like, even just and I've mentioned this to you before, on Wednesdays on LinkedIn, I post a Wellness Wednesday tip, and it's just about, you know, this week's tip was about basically boosting your psychological well being through gratitude and kindness. So I just basically have a message out there with some quotes around those. Those two values about being kind and grateful for things. And so I mean, that's another way you could use it as like, you know, you could reach you can just reach people just putting out a real leave positive message. Gosh, I got this one. I want to share this with you and the listeners. Oh my gosh, this was such a good post that I had read. Let me see if I can find it real quick. So it's, it said I read this somewhere because I asked a friend who crossed 70 and is heading towards 80 years old what sort of changes he is feeling in himself, he sent me the following. So I'll just read these to you. They're really beautiful. So number one, after loving my parents, my siblings, my spouse, my children and my friends, I have started now loving myself, too. I have realized that I am not Atlas, the world does not need to rest on my shoulders. Number three, I have stopped bargaining with vegetable and fruit vendors. A few pennies more is not going to break me might help a poor fellow save for his daughter's school fees. Right number four. I leave my waitress a big tip the extra money might bring her a smile. She is toiling much harder for a living than I am. Number five, I stopped telling the elderly that they've already told me that story many times the story makes them walk down memory lane and relive their past. Number six, I have learned not to correct people even when I know they are wrong. So the onus of making everyone perfect is not on me. piece is more precious than perfection. Number seven, I give compliments freely and generously compliments are a mood enhancer not only for the recipient, but also for me. And a small tip for the recipient of a compliment. Never Never turn it down. Just say thank you. Right. Number eight, I have learned not to bother about a crease or spot on my shirt. Personality speaks louder than appearances. Yes. Number nine, I walk away from people who don't value me. They may they may not know my worth, but I do. Right. Number 10. I remain cool when someone plays dirty to outrun me in the rat race. I'd like to listen, I am not a rat, and neither am I in any race. I like that. Number 11. I am learning not to be embarrassed by my emotions. It's my emotions that make me human. Number 12. I have learned that it's better to drop the ego than to break a relationship. My ego will keep me aloof. Whereas with relationships, I will never be alone. For 13 As I have learned to live each day as if it's the last after all, it might just be that number 14 and a blast when I am doing what makes me happy. I am responsible for my happiness, and I owe it to myself. Happiness as a choice. You can be happy at any time just choose to be. So that was just something that somebody had posted on social media. And you know, it's just a feel good thing. So I again, I didn't have to write it, but I can share it around and let other people benefit from it as well. So I think that's another way to kind of reach out there.

Speaker 1 38:03

Yeah, that is a great little way to do it. And obviously, you know, we're here on the radio, and people can call us here at 248557 3300 to connect with us here between nine and 11am. Monday through Friday. Dr. biter joins us every Wednesday, between nine and 10am here on our first hour, and we discuss things that about mental wellness, right about how can we be better in this world that we're living? And how can we be better towards the people around us? And how can we be better to or our neighbors. And, you know, because I feel like there are so many parts and pieces and components in our culture in our society today, that we need to step back a little bit and appreciate what we have, what we what we can do, and things that, you know, we get off track of how we actually even judge ourselves sometimes I feel because of the way our society is kind of structured right now with social media, and with how other things are structured. So we got to take it easy on ourselves and remember to be kind to ourselves, first of all, and one of those little statements right there doc had had that part in there, I felt like was a piece in there. The caring about yourself is a big piece and you know, some of those things that you mentioned in there, you know, unfortunately took until, you know, you're 70 years old to figure out and we can share these ideas and concepts a little bit younger so people can, you know, not have that ego and mess up things along the way earlier in life. You know? So, so many things we can learn from our elders and this is one of the things I feel like our show does as well Doc is like we share these kinds of things. We are neighbors and people are from all all over the metro and from all different types of backgrounds and we get to share this information right here on the radio right here on w NZK. I want to make sure everyone knows that you can get a hold of Dr. biters information by going to ask the neighbor calm and we've got a page for Dr. biter in there with links to your information Dr. biter and um if you want to go to direct to Dr. biters information, you can go to happy dot life h a p p e dot life, which you're gonna see multiple programs there. And the first program that you see is EFT.

Unknown Speaker 40:45

Right, and that's Freedom Technique, tapping,

Speaker 1 40:49

Emotional Freedom Technique tapping. So could that make us have better social connectivity doc?

Unknown Speaker 40:58

You know, if you approach situations from a calmer place in your own mind, yeah. Okay. So you know, what's really I find interesting is like, when when I have clients that come to see me for anxiety or stress issues, I will typically go through a tapping session with them in my office. And there's a couple reasons I do that is because a lot of times people think it's weird stuff I'm not doing, I don't feel really self conscious. I'm not doing that, right. But inevitably, and I can't tell you that I've ever had somebody said, Oh, well, that was stupid, that didn't work out. My, the typical response I get is, wow, that was really, you know, really calming, I feel calmer already. So doing it with someone else, I think is, is a good way to select even if you know someone that is really kind of stressed or anxious from being, you know, stuck inside or on being able to socialize, why not give them a call and say, Hey, listen, are you available to do like zoom or FaceTime or something? Let's, let's I want to show you something, I think it's kind of cool. You can just follow along with me, or we can just follow along with this program right?

Speaker 1 42:05

Now, um, do you share those kinds of videos on any social media that you do doc that you share? Like, okay, here's a couple tapping procedures for this, or here's a couple tapping procedures for that.

Unknown Speaker 42:20

I have not done that. Now, there's nothing to prevent me from doing that. I just,

Speaker 1 42:26

I'm just curious if there was out there. Yeah, there's,

Unknown Speaker 42:29

there's a, there's a really good app called that Tapping Solution that you can download to your phone and they have, you can you can, you know, buy into their program and subscribe, they have literally hundreds of tapping sessions around that will cover anything from pain management, to weight loss to dealing with your issues, if you have money issues, if you feel like you're kind of obsessed around food cravings, or whatever. But yeah, there is. And then obviously, on YouTube, I think if you just YouTube Emotional Freedom Techniques, or tap and you'll get, you'll get a plethora of opportunities and resources there as well.

Speaker 1 43:13

Well, the beautiful thing is, is that you have an app that is free to download free to get and that's through happy dot life, h a p p e dot life, and folks can download or you're going to get that sent to you via an email, when you go to happy dot life, you input your email, and then you'll be sent the application that you put into your phone that teaches you and this is catered for adolescents, but can be used by anyone. Right? So go to happy dot life, you also have another couple different programs in there, like Mission Impossible. And just good overall, positive types of things that you've been working on for your whole life really?

Unknown Speaker 44:07

Yeah, yeah. And then the Mission Impossible video series is basically there's a way that you know, we're encouraging people to interact, you know, on a social basis. So there's there's some first social emotional and mental health there. So the challenges are to get you to do something that interacts with other people, like for example, we, one of them is about asking you to smile or three people this week and see if they get them to smile back. But if they don't, don't make a big issue out of it, it's just there. It's just their life, not yours. You just move on to the next. So

Speaker 1 44:41

oh, that's just smile. I don't know. I mean, you know, it's really interesting and important that we do smile. And sometimes we think we take that for granted. We don't think about it. Right? You know, make sure we smile that opens up the whole room for you when you smile. Yeah, Doc, thank you so much for being on our show anything else that you would like to let our audience know?

Unknown Speaker 45:07

No, just, again, you know, I've talked about my friend who's nearing the end of his life and, you know, don't wait to pay a compliment or to reach out to somebody to offer them a lending hand or random acts of kindness. Because you never know when it's too late. Like the thing I read said, you know, live each day as though it's your last because it just might be important to do that.

Speaker 1 45:33

Well, this is why we love having you on our show doc because you remind us of these things that we sometimes in the hustle bustle of life, forget how important it is to just be human and to stay connected and to pay a compliment. Reach out pick up the phone you know, put your ego away and you know just have a good life Alright, Doc well thank you very much as the snow is coming in. We shall and shall be all right here. I got my snow. My I got my sled actually in the back of my car. So I'm ready to go any Anywhere. Anytime right now. Yeah, we're ready to go. Just in case. Alright, Doc, you have a wonderful day. Okay, take care. Thank you for calling. Alright, be safe. Alright, that was Dr. John biter. Letting us know a little bit about social connectivity. And having a great conversation here on w NZK. Ask the neighbor is the show. I'm your host Danko Sutter offski with DJ chub ca and here we go we're gonna play a little song and then we will be back

Unknown Speaker 46:46

Love me tender love me sweetie. Never Let Me Go You have made my life truly love you so Love me tender loving me true. Oh, my dream fulfill for my dogs love you Love me tender love me low tech take me to your home for a pillow never Love me tender love me true. Oh my dreams fulfill for my darling and Love me tender love me Do tell me you owe me you through all the years. Till the End Time. Love Me Tender. Love me true. Oh my dream. Fulfill for my darling. Love you oh

Speaker 1 49:25

alright DJ,

Unknown Speaker 49:26

yeah, Elvis Presley Would Love Me Tender and I goes out to David to Detroit couldn't find that chipmunks version so can't go wrong with Elvis.

Speaker 1 49:35

All right, that's all right. We're looking for callers, folks. 248557 3300 is the number you're listening to WNZ K on 690 am your host Danko singer offski I want to make sure we acknowledge Louis Tire Service Louis Tire Service located on Eight Mile Road 317 East Eight Mile Road fast and friendly service for over 50 years Believe it or not in an orange building. With blue trim, half off of your tire repair when you mentioned ask the neighbor and their phone number is 248-542-0930 That's Louis Tire Service. Thank you to father's justice law 313-819-9176 That's father's justice law 313-819-9176 Thank you to one mag.tv o n e ma g.tv your Omni media solution waiting room media that you can access hundreds of different magazines right through one mag.tv Thank you to Detroit bold coffee, calm, boldly brewed in Motown with flavors like nightmare black, and Woodward blend. Detroit bold coffee.com also put in your very Detroit promo code all lowercase all one word, and you can get a discount. Thank you to tech solutions consultants.com Rene concetti can help you be more resilient at 248-566-3362 That's Rene concetti from tax solutions consultants.com 248566336 To thank you to kabob Island 586-751-7511 That's kabob island.com is how to get to the information thank you to Troy jewelers to 485280962 We're looking for callers folks if you're out there give us a ring 248557 3300 We're going to go to a song until we do this as a dolly

Unknown Speaker 51:26

yeah

Speaker 1 51:27

all right. What day is this?

Unknown Speaker 51:28

Hey 699 All

Speaker 1 51:31

right DJ here we go day nine

Unknown Speaker 51:46

oh sometimes go to sweet flowers to the Fado Ceman sweet when you we once knew we could go cross Do you ever wake up no memories ever take you back into another place Oh And do you ever miss the fee there we go and again Sweden

Unknown Speaker 53:56

Do you recall

Unknown Speaker 54:01

Do you ever wake up do your memories ever take you back into another place Oh, you ever miss the feeling? I just wonder

Speaker 1 55:27

Alright, DJ,

Unknown Speaker 55:28

yeah, Dolly Parton Do I ever cross your mind and oh man, I

Speaker 1 55:32

hope she's listening to these songs we're playing for her every day out there. On WNZ K, you're listening to 690 AM. And you can go now and check out our SoundCloud page and listen to every single day that we have played a dolly song, and you can go back in time to soundcloud.com forward slash very Detroit. And you can access all of that information, you can also go to very detroit.com and click on the listen button. And you can go to all of our shows that we've done here since March 1 of 2021. Every single show focuses up there on the World Wide Web, and you can access it by going to very detroit.com Clicking the listen button. We also have begun recapping and transcribing some of our shows. And you can access those by going to very detroit.com and clicking Show recap. By doing that. It's going to take you to text that has been converted from our show from our audio files to a text file. And you can read there what was said during the day and we're going to be transcribing more and more information as our show continues. And we have more and more callers and you can listen to all of it on soundcloud.com forward slash very Detroit. I want to go back a little bit here and mention the cottage butter horns. Those were given on January 27. Those were this recipe that recipe was given by Peggy and hopefully everyone wrote it down because they look phenomenal. Those are cutted cottage butter horns, which was something that was requested. And then we also had a recipe for chicken pot pie that was given here. Rice Pudding recipes, and many other recipes that we share. Every time that we get a chance to share a recipe we do it right here on Ask the neighbor 248557 3300 is the number. We're going to go to a station ID break right now. And we will be back.

Unknown Speaker 57:48

W NZK team has available a few good hours of airtime for a few good programs to serve their communities. Radio is better than ever, in targeting an audience that listens to what you say. Learn more about this exciting radio broadcasting opportunity by calling WNZK radio at 248557 3500 Verse is w NZK Dearborn heights, Detroit's your ethnic superstation out 690 days 680 Nights

Speaker 1 58:26

Alright everyone, welcome to the top of the second hour here on Ask the neighbor and you can go to ask the neighbor.com to check out all of our information and recaps of our shows. Also our content contributors that come on to our show are on our website, ask the neighbor.com you can also listen to the stream directly from ask the neighbor.com and we also have links to other recipes on there and pictures of DJ Chaka are on the website and of myself are on the website with the Ask the neighbor original T shirts that were artistically done by David are actually on the website. So when you go to ask the neighbor comm check it out. And you will see some pictures on there live. Also don't forget we also gave a recipe for the water pie on January 27. If anybody else was looking for that recipe, let us know. The clouds are it's getting what would you call that? DJ? What do we got of your fog now?

Unknown Speaker 59:28

Yeah, or overcast?

Speaker 1 59:31

Overcast? Yeah, it's no one. He didn't study. He didn't study. No. Yeah, he did. Yeah. Well, alright, I guess overcast, right. What's the barometric pressure right now? What's the barometric pressure? We need it? Let us know what it is? 248557 3300 All right. We're gonna go to something about smiling. Here we go.

Unknown Speaker 59:57

When I was a child, I always wanted to be a superhero. I wanted to save the world and make everyone happy. But I knew that they need superpowers to make my dreams come true. So I used to embark on these imaginary journeys to find intergalactic objects from planet kripton, which was a lot of fun but didn't use much result. When I grew up, and realize that science fiction was not a good source for superpowers, I decided instead to embark on a journey of real science to find a more useful truth. I started my journey in California with UC Berkeley 30 year longitudinal study that examined the photos of students in an old yearbook, and try to measure their success and wellbeing throughout their life. By measuring their students smiles researcher were able to predict how fulfilling and long lasting a subject marriage will be, how else you would score in standardized tests of well being and how inspiring she would be to others. In another yearbook, I stumbled upon Barry Obama's picture. When I first saw his picture, I thought that his superpowers came from his super color. But now I know it was all in smile. Another aha moment came from my 2010 10 Wayne State University research project that looked into pre 1950s baseball cards of Major League players. The researchers found that the span of a player's smile could actually predict the span of his life. Players who didn't smile in their pictures live an average of only 72.9 years, where players with beaming smiles lived an average of almost 80 years. The good news is that were actually born smiling. Using 3d ultrasound technology, we can now see that developing babies appear to smile, even in the womb. When they're born, babies continue to smile initially, mostly in their sleep, and even blind baby smile to the sound of the human voice. Smiling is one of the most basic biological uniform expressions of all humans. In studies conducted in Papua New Guinea, Paul Ekman, the world's most renowned researcher on facial expression found that even members of the 40 tribe, who were completely disconnected from Western culture, and also known for their unusual cannibalism rituals, attributed smile to descriptions of situation the same way you and I would, from Papua New Guinea. to Hollywood, all the way to modern art in Beijing, we smile often, and you smile to express joy and satisfaction. How many people here in this room smile more than 20 times per day? Raise your hand if you do. Oh, wow. outside of this room, more than a third of us smile more than 20 times per day, whereas less than 14% of us smile less than five. In fact, those with the most amazing superpowers are actually children who smile as many as 400 times per day. Have you ever wondered why being around children who smile so frequently make you smile? Very often. A recent study at Uppsala University in Sweden found that it's very difficult to from when looking at someone who smiles. You ask why? Because smiling is evolutionary contagious, and it suppresses the control we usually have on our facial muscles. mimicking a smile and experiencing it physically help us understand whether a smile is fake or real, so we can understand the emotional state of the smiler. In a recent mimicking study at University of Claremore pharaon in France, subjects were asked to determine whether a smile was real or fake while holding a pencil in their mouth to repress smiling muscles. Without the pencil subject were excellent judges but with the pencil in their mouth when they could not mimic the smile they saw. Their judgment was impaired. In addition to theorizing on evolution in the Origin of Species, Charles Darwin also wrote the facial feedback response theory. His theory states that the act of smiling itself actually makes us feel better rather than smiling being merely a result of feeling good. In a study there will actually study the French neurologist Julian Duchenne, who used the electric jolt to facial muscles to induce and stimulate smiles. Please don't try this at home.

Unknown Speaker 1:04:40

In a related German study, researchers use fMRI imaging to measure brain activity before and after injecting Botox to suppress smiling muscles, defining supportive Darwin's theory, but by showing that facial feedback modifies the neural processing of emotional content in the brain in a way that helps us feel better when we smile. Smiling stimulates our brain reward mechanism in a way that even chocolates how well regarded pleasure inducer cannot match. British researchers found that one smile can generate the same level of brain stimulation as up to 2000 bars of chocolate. Weight. The same study found the Smiling is as stimulating as receiving up to 16,000 pounds turning in cash. That's like 25 grand a smile. It's not bad. And think about it this way. 25,000 times 400. Quite a few kids out there feel like Mark Zuckerberg every day. And I like lots of chocolate, lots of smiling can actually make you healthier. Smiling can help reduce the level of stress enhancing hormones like cortisol, adrenaline, and dopamine, increase the level of mood enhancing hormones like endorphins and reduce overall blood pressure. And if that's not enough, smiling can actually make you look good in the eyes of others. A recent study at Penn State University found that when you smile, you don't only appear to be more likeable and courteous, but you're actually appear to be more competent. So whenever you want to look great and competent, reduce your stress, or improve your marriage or feel as if you just had a whole stack of high quality chocolate without incurring the caloric cost. As if you found 25 grand in a pocket when all jacket you hadn't worn for ages. Or whenever you want to tap into a superpower that will let you and everyone around you live a longer, healthier, happier life. Smile.

Speaker 1 1:06:55

Alright, DJ,

Unknown Speaker 1:06:57

yeah, that was the hidden power of smiling. And that was Ron Guttman. Alright,

Speaker 1 1:07:00

thank you for that. And hopefully, our neighbors are remembering how important it is to smile out there. And we talked about it a little bit earlier with Dr. John biter, and he was explaining how powerful that is and what we can do with it and following it up with a TED talk talking more about smiling, and I had a friend that used to say, man, a smile can open up any door. And don't forget that. Smiles are incredible. You're listening to WNZ K, ask the neighbor is the show. I'm your host Danko Sutter offski, coming to you Monday through Friday 9am till 11am. Except on Thursdays, we're here from 9am till 10am. Here with DJ chub, co bringing the tunes and we've got content contributors that are coming on a line all the time. Monday through Friday. Yesterday we had Billy White House was with us from White House real estate, white houses.com sharing with us some opportunities that exist in real estate right now that people might not know about. Every single day. We're trying to bring you information that's going to make your life a little bit better than it was the day before. And hopefully you're enjoying all of what we're putting out there. Right now. We've got Rene concetti on the line from tech solutions consultants. Good morning, Renee. What's happening?

Unknown Speaker 1:08:25

Good morning. Good morning. All listeners. Yes, thanks. What a day. It's gonna be.

Speaker 1 1:08:30

Yeah, I'm looking out the window right now. And I'm thinking, Boy, what is about to hit here?

Unknown Speaker 1:08:38

Wow, some people were yesterday like, well, we don't think that's gonna happen. I think they're a lot better predicting. Now. We dodged the bullet last week didn't mean well south of us.

Speaker 1 1:08:51

Yeah. Well, we were supposed to get that right.

Unknown Speaker 1:08:54

Last week. Yeah. Just once out. It went south of us at the I haven't said last moment but the whole thing and the way it's set up I guess. Just skirted bottom of Michigan, so we can't we can't bounce it forever. So

Speaker 1 1:09:09

no, I know you well,

Unknown Speaker 1:09:10

and I hope that everybody stay safe.

Speaker 1 1:09:13

Yeah. I feel like there's been enough preparation I feel that everyone at least has I definitely the stores that been emptied out I know that they've been

Unknown Speaker 1:09:25

Yeah, I know. We went to we I went there I went on Monday. Just said hey, you know,

Speaker 1 1:09:30

what does this what does this do to the wallet

Unknown Speaker 1:09:34

out? I only bought I only went grocery shopping early. Oh, what I normally would have Okay, okay, I usually go maybe, maybe Thursday or Friday night this time I just went yesterday.

Speaker 1 1:09:47

Well now when you are working with people and and things like this with their finances, do you get into the food budget?

Unknown Speaker 1:09:57

Um, depending on where we're at going with that, if they're if they're a beginning investor, or they haven't done that much investing, and they have, we talked about debt. Yeah, credit card debt, we've talked about how well they're able to keep up with their current bills. We talked about whether they have any emergency money, they should have at least three months, minimum, six months is optimal. Especially with the things that have gone on in our lives in the last two years. So you just never know, right? Whether you're gonna have to wait and get a new job, or, you know, you just decide, wow, I'm gonna start my own business. A lot of things have happened in the last last two years, as we well know. Right? And so yeah, we go through a lot of preparation before we say, hey, yeah, write a check or transfer money, you know, to, uh, you know, to your new account, and we'll proceed because I don't want people I don't think it's wise for them to begin doing a whole lot of investing, when they haven't got everything else. Done. It's like trying to bring new furniture into a house when you haven't been cleared out the older, you haven't made preparations for.

Speaker 1 1:11:14

Right. Yeah, right. Well, and that's some, you know, these are the things that, that affect a lot of people, though, it's these little daily expenditures that add up over time, right, during that month, you know, all I can, you know, I'll just buy this little thing here, and I'll get this here. And I'll do this online, and then I'll do that there. And I can use this here. But, um, I think a lot of people have gotten into trouble like this, Renee.

Unknown Speaker 1:11:45

They do, because they think that they can put money away, they're not truthful with themselves or with the person they're working with. And the next thing, you know, they're, they're going back to their account, and they're taking money out to pay for, you know, bills and stuff. And that's, that's not the purpose of investing. It's money that you're saving for the future, for a number of reasons, is if you're young enough, that's going to take care of you, and you're an old yourself, because nobody else is going to

Speaker 1 1:12:17

know they want money

Unknown Speaker 1:12:18

away. Right? Right. Don't count on your kids to commercial, and they show these kids doing things and they said, Nope, I guess we won't depend on that one. And it was kind of a funny thing, but it's, it's serious, it really, it really is the need to be able to everybody needs to make their own path in their own way of taking care of themselves.

Speaker 1 1:12:43

And it's, and we just don't know what can occur, right for ourselves. Don't you can't bank that your spouse will be there to take care of you. Right, you can't bank on that. You can't bank on, you know, your sister or anybody else to be there tomorrow. Or your children or your children, you know, you have to make sure that you have enough to take care of you, let's say maybe that you might not be able to get around like you used to write, you know, you're gonna have expenses and in transportation, you're going to have expenses for other people may be bringing you things, those are going to be increased costs that are not normal. You might have other people that might need to come and clean for you. Those are

Unknown Speaker 1:13:37

poker, do your laundry or whatever, just because you're not able to, you know it, you know, some of the health issues that we see that happen to people, we think, Oh, that's not going to happen to me. Well, I guess the there's things that happen all the time and you don't know, right? You just don't know. I mean, strokes are are not something that are uncommon.

Speaker 1 1:14:01

Yeah. No, I mean, that's that's the scariest thing too. Yeah. I had a neighbor, where it was multiple days that she had fallen had a stroke. And it was two, three days later till they found her you know, and she's lucky she's still alive, right? This was a while ago. But yeah, those are the situations that you hear, right. And she was in great shape cutting her own lawn, everything was fine. And then boom, one day, something hit her and now she's unable then they had to bring in a full time nurse. That's expensive. They brought in someone from Poland actually. Luckily, you know, because if you bring in 24/7 care here in America, to take care of someone it's going to be quite expensive. Quite expensive,

Unknown Speaker 1:14:53

can always count on. You know, even moms. I've heard moms and dads say lean on my kids. Come and take care of me. They're working, they have their own families, right? I mean, they, you know, adding one more stressor to their life is going to, it's going to complicate it not not make it, you know, easy, right? We always think that there'll be someone there for us. It's not not that there couldn't be or wouldn't be, but don't count on it. Don't think on that right now.

Speaker 1 1:15:23

Right? Right. You got to prepare for the future. And you got to prepare as if, you know, because things could happen to everybody we know. And we might be the only one left. Right. I mean, that's possible, too.

Unknown Speaker 1:15:38

I've seen that as well. I've seen that as well. And then then you're kind of like, depending upon friends. Well, that's not family, no, no things. Things change. And you know, families more forgiving. Although most people do not think that way. They actually in the long run are more forgiving. Right then friends, because, you know, a lot of people just said, Yeah, I can be your friend. But when it gets to be tough, they're not there. Well, yeah.

Speaker 1 1:16:07

The question is, there's a lot of different types of friends, right? There's real friends, and then there's acquaintances, and then there's right, um, you know, true, true friends, where it's sometimes better than family. And there'll be

Unknown Speaker 1:16:23

friends that are there for a season. Yeah, they call it your life a few years or whatever. And, oh, the whole dynamic changes, and they're gone.

Speaker 1 1:16:36

Yeah, well, you know, I mean, I've had friends, I think, Well, it's funny. I've had friends for weeks. You know, I mean, they were like, Oh my gosh, I don't want this person as a friend. But that happens to you know, we we bump into folks that may not be good for us. And they're, you know, they're for we're not

Unknown Speaker 1:16:55

good for them, or we're not good. They kind of like disappear, or as they call it now. It's I was informed ghosting, ghosting. Well, okay, I guess if that makes sense. Yeah, yeah, term certainly makes sense. We all got that they kind of just disappeared.

Speaker 1 1:17:12

Right? Now. Um, so again, when we're talking with Rene, we're talking with Rene Carcetti here on Ask the neighbor, and you can get to Rene's information by going to tech solutions consultants.com. Or you can give rene a call at 248-566-3362. You can also call right here right now into the show. While we're talking with Rene, we're having a casual conversation like we do every Wednesday with Rene. Because, you know, I think so many people feel like financial people are out of touch, enter all these bookkeeping, accountants, you know what I mean?

Unknown Speaker 1:17:51

Now, some, some, some are in and I like to be a little more practical. And sometimes I have to drag information out of people. So I tell him, I don't have enough information to make to answer your question or make an assessment or even help you and give you guidance, right. So it's very important that, firstly, you know, you have to build trust, you know, and it's, it may take, you know, a little while, some people you meet, and you just hit it right off with and you just end up telling him your whole life story happens once in a while, right. But, you know, anything and everything is confidential. I mean, we're talking about things, but I'm not talking about anyone specific when I give examples, right. Although I do know, something may be somebody else's example that I've heard, but it's not, you know, I'm not divulging anything right now. But anyone that I work with

Speaker 1 1:18:43

everything is a must be competent, very confidential. And then you can go through our but you know, it's super important, like, the personality of a financial person, a lot of times, you know, it's hard to work with some some folks that are just a numbers person, and doesn't have the personality to talk, you know, right.

Unknown Speaker 1:19:08

Right. You got to be make a connection, both say it my case, myself and the person I'm going to work with, and I explained that it's a partnership, they're, they're thinking in their thought patterns, about money and in different things are valid. I mean, they most people have an opinion Sure, one way or the other. And so that has to be taken into account. I mean, I'm not I when I work with people I'm not taking over. I'm sharing ideas and presenting tools to them that they have no idea about and helping them make good choices to get where are they wish to be, you know, in the in the near future or even the extended future. So there's goals that are set. You know, life changes as your may plants. But you know, some of this is, you know, a path to follow. So it's up to them to follow the path, I'll lay out the path. And they'll take it as far as they're comfortable

Speaker 1 1:20:13

with it. And sometimes that PET CT,

Unknown Speaker 1:20:16

the result is dependent. Yes, none is as we go along, then we have to reevaluate, is this going to get you where you need to go? You know, because the commitment has to be on both our parts, I'm committed to helping them, but they've got to meet me halfway and cooperating. You know, so they say, I'm going to save $100 a month, right? Or whatever. And then they find out they can't, then we need to readjust the goal, right? Because we're not going to get there for only gonna do half the amount.

Speaker 1 1:20:45

Oh, well, he adjusted a lot. Yeah, you have to adjust the goal and see what else you need to adjust

Unknown Speaker 1:20:52

talking about getting into retirement or even during retirement. Because I have people that have retired, and for various and sundry reasons they've spent too much money or they've gone a little overboard, on vacations or whatever. So now, you know, and now we're hitting things, and they're terrified because of it well, because they see that the error of their way, and they're not necessarily going to be able to continue doing all those fun things. You know, you go through different patterns in different times in your life where you're feeling, I want to call morale depressed or anything, but we have depression over the last two years. Anywhere. So everybody wants to leave and go somewhere. When are they financially able just because you want to? And you need to? Can you afford?

Speaker 1 1:21:43

Can you afford to? Right? And when?

Unknown Speaker 1:21:45

What if you can afford to go far away? What What other things can you do to like brighten up your your mental health, you know, what kinds of things can you do that would make you smile? More smile? Yeah, feel like well, smile? Absolutely.

Speaker 1 1:22:01

I mean, you smile a lot. I that's what I love about you, Renee, you smile all the time. And you have that great beaming personality about you that's makes you people feel good.

Unknown Speaker 1:22:14

Right? Well, life is, we only get one life here. Enjoy the ride, even though it's not every day isn't phenomenal. And the way we'd like it to go. At the end of the day, we're still breathing, we still have hopefully food and a place to sleep. And we're warm. Yeah, I feel I pray for all those people that are out on the street, or either by choice or because there's no other thing that they find, yeah, no different paths and get get back on track here. But

Speaker 1 1:22:47

the mind, you know, the mind, you know, our mind is the main driver for everything we do. You know, how we spend, what we don't buy what we do do what

Unknown Speaker 1:22:59

I call temptation. So it's an introduction to something it's neither right nor wrong. You're introduced? I mean, how much are we seeing either on our phones or on the internet or on television, a lot are telling us you need this, right? I mean, if you buy this, you're going to be you know that that's behind their marketing, do this, and you'll get that. Yeah, the toothpaste, you get a gleaming smile, everybody, I mean, all kinds of things, you know, if you analyze what they're trying to do, so I'm not trying to do any of that I'm trying to be as practical is upfront, and forthcoming and laying out things for people that if you go in this direction, this might happen. If you go in this direction, this has a good probability of happening. So we got to do that. Because we don't know if I knew what was going to happen next year. Everybody, you know, that luck with with, you know, where they went made in the shade? My life would be rare in my life, and everything would be very easy.

Speaker 1 1:24:00

That's right. Well, we don't know. No, we don't we have to take we can project we can estimate. And we can plan, the best that we can. And you have all the tools that that really are superior financial tools, and you're working with a larger organization, that when you're working with someone, you're putting in the numbers, you're putting in the goals, you're putting in all these different components to drive out the plan of what

Unknown Speaker 1:24:33

right to make to assure that the probability of success, right, that's what we're looking for, what kind of success are we going to have if we take this path? And we do these things? What is the likelihood that this outcome is going to be very positive and get us on target is not so close to it, you know, I hate to see people have to say well, I guess I'm going to have to delay retirement because, you know, and somewhere along the way or recently, they've just said, you know, hey, life's short, and I'm just gonna blow it, you know, I'm just gonna go for broke. I've heard a few people say that they're not my clients, but I've heard them say that in our, in our discussions and our onboarding interviews, as I call them, because I'm looking at them as well, as they're looking at me. You know, can we work well together? Are we going to be honest with one another? Do my ideas going to help them? Are they going to battle me every step of the way? When I make a suggestion? So, you know, nobody wants that?

Speaker 1 1:25:42

No, no, you want to work in unison in unison, right?

Unknown Speaker 1:25:45

When I look at it, not the open, I'm open to what they're thinking. And I would like them to be open to the, you know, I give them choices I give them here, here's one way of doing something to get to this goal here says another way, you know, which one of these 234 ways? You know, I try not to give them too many, because then they get stuck. ways of doing something that that, you know, feasible, right? doable, measurable, right, you know, those are all the things that you have to do for a goal that How am I know, I'm on track? Yeah, how do I know I'm getting there? Right? How do I know that this is even going to work? Right? You know, because no, time is time with money is is more just as valuable as the actual money. So that one more time, you have to have enough time with your money to get to where you want to go, not just, you know, either have to have one more money or more time. You know, if you don't have enough money, you got to have lots of time to get to the goal. But if you do have the money, that's, that's fine. But you still have a goal in that, are you going to a track stay on track to get to where you want to go? You know, like little kids that are saving money. I'll use a personal one, my son worked very hard, most of the time he was in high school, so that he could buy his first car. And he saved up, you know, the money he needed to buy this car. It was a use use car, but you know, that's fine. Sure. And he bought it. And I guess I my thought was, he's never going to take some money out of the bank and go get that car. Oh, I'd saved up that much money. I'd be really reluctant about right, going. And he did it though. Oh, he this goal. And that's what his intention was and what he did,

Speaker 1 1:27:38

and boom, he took the money out of it. Right.

Unknown Speaker 1:27:42

That that was, you know, that was a lot earlier my career. I mean, my, you know, not very beginning or anything, but I thought, okay, all right, there are people that will stick to their guns and do what they want to do. How long did that I would if I saved up $8,000? I don't think I'd let part with a bit. You know, at his age, I don't think I would apart with it

Speaker 1 1:28:04

there. Right. But how long did that take them? Three years, three years. Not bad?

Unknown Speaker 1:28:10

Well, you know that but he was working after school and he was working at you know, in a in a grocery store. And he made you know, and he didn't have any particular bills to pay. You know, he was living at home, he was still, you know, a child, quote, unquote, you know, I mean, still, we were responsible for all of his needs, paying for them. Sure. So, you know, that's what I thought, you know, if I had the opportunity to save that kind of money and not have to worry about paying for anything. I don't know that I would bet gives me a big advantage. A big, you know, use, you know, that I don't think I'll get Yeah, I don't think I'll get that opportunity. I mean, imagine I shouldn't part with this money. So quickly.

Speaker 1 1:28:54

Well imagine, you know, and today, I bet you that they may say you know what? Forget buying a car, I'm gonna go buy some cryptocurrency and take Uber and take the Ubers and you know, I'll invest that money. And a whole a whole shift has happened here in our culture.

Unknown Speaker 1:29:16

That's still thankful that's still spending, you know, you could buy the cryptocurrency but you're not holding that, you know, there's no hard, you know, it's not like dollars that you can hold in your hand or coins that you could wrap up in a jar. Right? It's all it's all on a computer. It's all electronic. And I personally, rather than holding that we have we have ways of buying futures, never holding the Bitcoin or never holding these other cryptocurrencies, but you're leveraging them. Oh, you don't have to own them. Yeah, no, you don't have to another option. You can. Yeah, there's options that you could be invested in You know, in a in a portfolio that places futures on a more the other thing, and of course, you have to have the tolerance to it, I don't see the much difference in the tolerance than trying to have these kids just go out, go online and buy this stuff. You know, and it's in, it's on paper, it's in their account. But can they really ever cash it in? When there's some new tax things, if the government's treating it as if they're not giving them any cost basis to it? Because they don't, they have, it's fluctuates so much. Right? When you're buying this, you'd almost have to have a piece of paper, which there isn't any record what you bought it for, and the price you bought it for, and prove it. So that when you sell it, the government isn't taxing you on all that. And that's what they're doing now. So if you sell your cryptocurrency, the whole amount that you sold, becomes now cash, and I mean, becomes taxable.

Speaker 1 1:30:59

Whoa. So you got to be really honest, there's

Unknown Speaker 1:31:02

a lot a little caveat there. Yeah. Cuz it's pretty new in this new and investing this particular asset class, we'll call it, that and the IRS and, and has not really, fully figured out how, you know, like, if you buy a stock, you know, what, you get a piece of paper says you bought it this many shares at this price. Right? That's your cost basis. Cryptocurrency doesn't have anything like that. It's just, it's online and buy it anywhere. Right? That's scary, too. Well, I mean, it's not, it's not it's not controlled by, you know, there's, it's not the SEC controlling it. It's not a lot of things. It's just like, you know, to me, it's kind of like phantom stuff. I mean, the actual owning of the assets. There's other ways you can invest in that and get some profit off of that without ever having to, you know, own nothing outright.

Speaker 1 1:32:07

Yeah, there's, I mean, you know, that's the things that you can learn when you talk with cat, when you talk with Rene because, honestly, Rene, you know, these are so many things. And that's why I'm so happy, you're part of our show, because there are some financial times that are coming. And we saw some dips in the market and a couple indicators of what could happen down the road. So really, it's smart to look at your overall portfolio as a business as an individual and tech solutions, consultants can do that for you, you can go to tech solutions. consultants.com. You can also give rene a call at 248-566-3362. And start a conversation really, because I think that's really what has to happen. And I like the fact that you ask those tough questions, and you make people be realistic with themselves.

Unknown Speaker 1:33:06

Right? That's, that's, that's the whole thing. You have to be real. Yeah. I can't have it can't have a Yeah, you're right, you're gonna have a dream that you want to get there. That's called a goal. But you know, you know, it's not magic.

Speaker 1 1:33:23

Exactly. You got to be realistic about how much you can put away and what you want to achieve and where you want to go to that and be committed to that.

Unknown Speaker 1:33:32

Keep your commitment because, you know, it's your money. It's your future because

Speaker 1 1:33:38

your future. Well, thank you so much, Renee for the call. Stay safe. And I hope you have a wonderful day. Be safe in there and we will talk to you next Wednesday. Okay, all right. Thanks. A great day. You too. All right. Take care. Bye. Bye. That's Renee concetti. From tax solutions consultants, Folks, you're listening. 690 am WNZK I'm your host Danko. Sutter offski with DJ chub coming to you every single day Monday through Friday 9am till 11am. Except on Thursdays, folks, so you can check us out to 90 9am till 10am on Thursdays. All right. Right now we've got Lucy from Chesterfield on the line. Good morning, Lucy. Good morning. How are you? All right. All right. We are just anticipating, I mean, it's so eerie to watch outside the window here because I could see the water tower clearly just a little while ago. And it's not even that far. And now it's not that clear. So it's coming.

Unknown Speaker 1:34:41

Right? Well, it just started really snowing here. Oh, okay. Okay. It's a little bit later. So we're not going to get as much as they predicted. We're going to get a good amount. They sat on TV. It's coming a little bit later than what they predicted. Oh,

Speaker 1 1:35:00

oh,

Unknown Speaker 1:35:01

well make it we're Michigan. I was born and raised here.

Speaker 1 1:35:06

I you know, it's not now so I stay in, there you go, you're staying inside and nothing's gonna happen if we can stay inside for a day or so until you know goes away or whatever. What are they seeing right now? Lucy as far as how much snow are they saying now?

Unknown Speaker 1:35:23

What did they say? We were giving bill? Clinton Township they didn't say new Baltimore. What was it eight to 10? Eight to 10? Yeah. Eight to 10

Speaker 1 1:35:33

Oh, yeah. You know. It's so funny. I know. But you know, what's funny, Lucy is that, you know, here's the news everywhere. He's all yelling and screaming, you know, there's a huge snow coming in. So it's gonna be over, you know, 18 inches or whatever, you know, I get a snow you got to get snow blowers and all this other stuff. And then And then here, here it is. It's gonna be like six and a half inches.

Unknown Speaker 1:36:03

news media hype everybody up. They run to the store, right? Clear out the shelves and

Speaker 1 1:36:10

is a line at the grocery store yesterday. I mean, I couldn't believe it. It was like it was like the end of the world. Every time. Something happens. Everybody's running to the store. Like they're gonna be locked out for six months.

Unknown Speaker 1:36:25

I know. I know. Charlie Langston was at a store. It was a Kroger's, I believe and Warren. There was nothing, nothing in the produce. Everything was wiped out. I mean, the shelves were bare, is ridiculous. I mean, yeah, in

Speaker 1 1:36:43

the food. A lot of it's gonna go to waste. Some of its gonna go to waste. Maybe not all of it, but Be smart. Be smart, folks. You know, it's gonna be a couple days to three days. It's not gonna be months, not six months. Yeah. So Right. Right. You got to be smart. You got to be Macomb County smart.

Unknown Speaker 1:37:02

Right. Okay, what happened to i You should quit calling in now?

Speaker 1 1:37:08

Well, I don't know. She was down in Austin. And I know she was looking. Interviewing for some work. So I know. That's how things go. Sometimes when we, when we get some free callers that have some availability. We love having them and if they can participate. It's great. Right? You know, right. And sometimes.

Unknown Speaker 1:37:29

I have a question. Sure. For the neighbors. I have this old recipe. And okay, I don't know if I forgot to write the flour down. It's monster peanut butter cookies supposed to be okay. Oh, and it doesn't I didn't have any flour. I mean, I made it up yesterday. I made the dough up and I thought were some flour but it had all this oatmeal in it. Okay. No flour, but oatmeal. Four and a half cups. Oh, but it makes you know, it's got a cup of sugar, a cup of brown sugar, blah, blah, blah, butter eggs. A company has a peanut butter, vanilla soda, salt, then m&ms and chocolate chips and whatever you want to put in. Okay, sounds rich. But there's no flour. Okay, what I want to know probably just gonna come out. I didn't even think about it until after I got it made up. I never made something with No, I never made a cookie with no flour. Right.

Speaker 1 1:38:36

I mean, maybe you didn't write down the flower part on there

Unknown Speaker 1:38:39

a long time ago. Okay. So but it has all the old Senate though. That should hold it together.

Speaker 1 1:38:46

Should I feel like it should hold it together. But there's nothing like flower.

Unknown Speaker 1:38:53

Well, some seasoned makers.

Speaker 1 1:38:59

Yeah. Well, we're with the season. Yes. Yes. Season. Lucy, you're very smart lady. You know, like the word older I know. Well, you know, it's interesting. You know, in Rochester, they call it that one place, the older persons center. Which, really? Yeah, Senior Center. It's a senior. It's a Yeah, it's called OPC older person center. Okay. And it's an amazing that

Unknown Speaker 1:39:29

doesn't bother me. But there are people that are vain. And they don't like that. They have to be careful. I mean,

Speaker 1 1:39:43

yeah. Yeah. By the mean. No, we are we are that's all there is to it. No, you can't. You can't lie to anyone. You are what you are going to get older as if we die when you're young. That's right. We'll keep getting older. Thank you very much. So you're thinking maybe there was some flour that you missed, but maybe not. Oh no, maybe not. Maybe not. The question we have right now, does the monster peanut butter cookie require flour? It's an older recipe. Lucy has put in four and a half cups of oatmeal in there. And she has never ever in her life made cookies without flour. And the question, but maybe there are some out there but you know, I have I feel you. I feel like there should be flour here. Lucy and I I'm with baby just fine. I don't know. Well, that's a great question. How many cookies does this recipe make? I didn't write that down. Okay, four and a half cups.

Unknown Speaker 1:40:50

says to put two to three tablespoons. For one cookie. Okay, except big cookie. Oh, yeah, I guess that's why it's called Monster Monster

Speaker 1 1:41:01

peanut butter. This is this sounds like a great, great cookie. Sweet. It's got a lot of things in it. And the question we have, will it stay together with no flour? That's the big question of butter in it in the oatmeal. And the oatmeal. So four and a half cups of oatmeal. And what was the other ingredients?

Unknown Speaker 1:41:27

What? Okay, a cup of sugar. One cup of sugar, brown sugar. Three eggs, half a cup. Half a cup of butter. Vanilla soda, salt. m&ms and chocolate chips and whatever you want in vanilla. And one and a half cups of peanut butter. Creamy or crunchy. Okay, I have creamy. I didn't have any crunchy. We don't cops.

Speaker 1 1:41:50

That's a lot. Yeah. This should make quite a few cookies.

Unknown Speaker 1:41:55

Yeah, but don't forget I just said use three. Two to three. heaping tablespoons per cookie. of dope per cookie. Yeah, so well. That's the question of make a big cookie.

Speaker 1 1:42:11

It's gonna be a good cookie, too. It sounds like it. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Good cookie. Bake with me. My mom does. Okay. Yes. She makes cookies with her all the time. He is great at it. She loves it. loves it. Loves it loves it. She got a snow day today, right? Yeah, for sure. For sure. Yeah. Yeah, well, alright. Lucy, thank you so much for the call. Is there anything else you want to let our neighbors know today?

Unknown Speaker 1:42:41

No. Yeah. What is David's gonna do with a snow shovel? Is he gonna go around shoveling snow? Good

Speaker 1 1:42:47

question. I hope not. I hope not to

Unknown Speaker 1:42:51

Lucy. Yeah, yeah. Karen called. She said she found that exact recipe and yeah, it's no flour. All right, really? Okay. All righty. Thank

Unknown Speaker 1:43:01

you, Karen. Awesome. That's an old recipe. So yeah, she must have looked it up for me. Thank you.

Speaker 1 1:43:09

Well, thank you. Thank you, Lucy. I want I wish you a great day. Stay safe. Well, you

Unknown Speaker 1:43:13

guys also everybody stay safe and be careful to get big snow. Be careful people shoveling,

Speaker 1 1:43:20

yes. Be careful. Take breaks. And if you can help shovel and if you're older, don't show them.

Unknown Speaker 1:43:26

You know, I don't know if there's any kids that go and do this anymore. Go out and shovel snow and somebody give you a couple bucks or whatever.

Speaker 1 1:43:33

And also, I hope so some extra money we use Joe Yeah, get out there and do a little shoveling guys. It's good for it's good for you. Yeah, kids. Thanks, Lucy. Good talking to you make it into my oh now buddy. I hope so. We'll be Claire. Hey, we'll try. We will try

Unknown Speaker 1:43:54

to be clear tomorrow. Okay, thank you. All right. We'll talk to everybody later. Bye. Bye. Bye bye

Speaker 1 1:43:59

now. Alright folks, that's our last caller for Ask the neighbor here. Show. And we are wrapping up today's show for Ask the neighbor. I want to make sure everyone thank you so much for tuning in to ask the neighbor today. We will see you tomorrow at 9am