Old Friend
Dear Old Friend,
I’m happy for you. I truly am.
You’re living freely and wonderfully, with a grin on your face.
Your eyes are beautiful. Life isn’t drained out of them.
Constantly, the sound of laughter bubbles up your throat.
It fills joy within all around you.
It is like the warmth on the skin during a cold December blizzard.
You are the warmth.
After convincing, you came to the world.
Beautiful faces looked down at your innocent one.
Your head like a peach, your eyes like blueberries, and a ladybug on your cheek.
I truly miss you, my friend.
I have not seen you in a long time.
Your warmth has been missing from my life.
The December blizzard has drowned me.
Snow falls out of every crevice, cold and icy.
I am restricted, in a cage. Is this hell?
I crave sleep every second. I can’t get up in the morning.
The sun despises me, and I loathe it. Waking me up every morning, I don’t deserve.
My bed is the drug I am addicted to.
I need more pills, constantly.
Blue, small pills that I must take every night.
“One and a half, don’t forget…
Don’t forget…
Satan might come…”
More pills.
What was just said to me? I can’t remember. Why can’t I remember?
I need to move. Move, fidget, play.
I can’t sit still…
Voices in my head, berating me. I don’t want to get up.
Then I have to face them, face myself.
It’s horrid. Why did you leave me, Old Friend?
Just come back…
But you can’t…
Why? I push you down, the virus inside me doesn’t let you come back.
I shall be ashamed, be embarrassed when you come.
I’ll know what you’ll say. You’ll look at me with your blueberry eyes, my friend.
You’ll stand there, asking me,
“What happened?”
And to that, I shall respond, Old Friend,
“We grew up.”
My name is Rebekah (Bekah, or Beks) Roemhildt and I am a ninth grader. I’ve been writing as long as I can remember, though it became more important in my life when the pandemic hit. During that time, I dealt with difficult mental turmoil and since then have used it to write. I commonly use my personal issues as inspiration for new pieces, especially poetry.