I in Silence Watch the Sun

I in silence watch the sun, soon to go to rest, Brooding on the solemn thoughts deep within my heart, As I wonder, is this day, One in which I really tried, really did my part? I in silence weep for things, things that never were, Children lost and never born, touches never felt, For words unsaid, things undone, For all I weep with bitter tears, tears that ever well. I in silence rage at wrongs, wrongs I cannot right, Words I wish I’d never said, said to people gone, Hurting those for whom I care. All I ponder with regret, feeling tired and worn. I in terror face the night, pain that ever grows, Pain that will not let me breathe, pain that will not cease. So I pray what no-one hears, With a silent shivering, praying for release. I would wish that I were strong, strong as those I know, Dealing well with no complaint, terrors put aside, Getting on with what is good, Feeling little of the pain, standing up with pride. But I am not one that strong; and now the day is gone, Only night now waits for me, dreams I cannot quell, Of the chances lost for good, Of the loving left undone, as I dream of hell. If the devil lets me go, if I have a chance The sun to find yet again, reach out for the light, I will try with all I have, Such sweet dreams to live and hold, cherish in the night. Bad things come no matter what, even if you try To make your choices always safe, proper right and true. All that’s left is reaching out For moments bright, moments sweet, moments shared with you.