Empathy is a skill that we can teach and it can grow. It needs to be cultivated. Restorative questioning can help in building empathy because they invite us to see eachother's perspectives & feel for one another. Start by asking: who do I want to be in this moment? The questions move from blame or attack and more towards empathy and trying to understand someone's perspective & feelings.
Restorative Questioning to Promote Empathy
(according to Restorative Practitioner, Michelle Stowe)
From your perspective, what happened?
What were you thinking at the time?
What have you thought about since? or What are you thinking now?
Who has been affected and in what way?
How could things have been done differently?
What do you think needs to happen next?
An empathy map is like a picture in your mind that helps you understand how someone else may feel. After selecting a person, begin your empathy map by identifying what you hear them say and see them do. You then imagine yourself as them and think about what they might think and feel. This helps you understand their feelings and why they might do what they do. Making an empathy map can be a helpful tool for being kind and understanding to others.
In this example of an Empathy Map (created by Jorge Valenzuela), there are four quadrants which can be fill in the blanks for whomever you are attempting to empathize with:
What I heard _____ say.
What I saw _____ do.
What I think _____ thinks.
What I think _____ feels.
The tool can make understanding someone’s thoughts and feelings easier by paying attention closely to their words and actions. Using the tool might not lead to perfect results, but it can help raise a student's empathy levels for the people around them.
Read more about how educators can use Empathy Maps:
Creating opportunities for students to experience empathy in a way that is authentic can be the best way for them to apply what they have learned. As educators, we understand that there is no single solution to these problems, but if we begin to engage students in empathy in the classroom, perhaps we can promote understanding, sensitivity, and awareness of those around us so that students may carry these skills into the world around them.
Take time to explore the slide deck below for some classroom ideas: