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Social Emotional Learning is a developmental process in which children learn to name, label, safely experience and manage the large span of human emotion.
Social Emotional Learning is a developmental process in which children learn to name, label, safely experience and manage the large span of human emotion.
Social Emotional learning is a building block for developing self-confidence, self-management, resilience, social awareness, empathy, relationships, and a growth "I can" mindset. It is a basis for empowering kindness, respect, and responsibility.
Social Emotional learning is a building block for developing self-confidence, self-management, resilience, social awareness, empathy, relationships, and a growth "I can" mindset. It is a basis for empowering kindness, respect, and responsibility.
Emotions for Kids - Happiness, Sadness, Fear, Anger, Disgust and Surprise - Smile and Learn - English (1080p, h264).mp4What I need to know:
What I need to know:
All feelings, even the ones that are uncomfortable, are okay. It's how we act when we feel these emotions that can be a problem.
Co-regulation is necessary in supporting children during big emotions. This means that a calm adult stays with and supports the child while they are experiencing their emotions. When caregivers provide consistent and supportive responses, children grow the ability to self-regulate throughout their lifespan.
Examples of co-regulation:
A warm, calming presence and tone of voice, labelling emotions, modeling of calm behaviours, and making them feel safe.
Ensure you support a repair in relationships afterwards and finish with a clean slate! Children must know they are loved unconditionally.
When children experience BIG emotions, it is not the correct time for coaching or correcting. Instead, ensure they are safe (as well as others) and that a calm adult is available to support them.
The first step in emotional learning is to NAME and LABEL emotions.
The first step in emotional learning is to NAME and LABEL emotions.
- Practice labelling emotions in yourself, in others & in books.
- Help children notice what is happening within their body when they are mad, worried, sad or disappointed. For example, you may notice your heart rate change, your eyes narrow or the sensation of "butterflies" in your tummy.
- Note: Everyone’s emotions/reactions to them can look different.
All emotions are okay, should be felt and expressed!
All emotions are okay, should be felt and expressed!
The Stress Response
The Stress Response
What happens when my child (or myself) looses control?
What happens when my child (or myself) looses control?
When we are calm, the brain is communicating effectively. During a Stress Response, the brain reacts to big emotions such as anger, fear, and anxiety. When our "thinking brain" is turned off and the "alarm center" acts on instinct, we access the sympathetic nervous system and experience fight, flight or freeze. Our abilities to think clearly or problem solve are significantly reduced, and therefore often simply react. When our lid is flipped, our brain is also not ready to learn.
When we are calm, the brain is communicating effectively. During a Stress Response, the brain reacts to big emotions such as anger, fear, and anxiety. When our "thinking brain" is turned off and the "alarm center" acts on instinct, we access the sympathetic nervous system and experience fight, flight or freeze. Our abilities to think clearly or problem solve are significantly reduced, and therefore often simply react. When our lid is flipped, our brain is also not ready to learn.
Our children need us more than ever in these instances.
Our children need us more than ever in these instances.
What to Expect from Your Child
What to Expect from Your Child
As our children grow and become more independent, they may demonstrate increased abilities for independently managing their emotional regulation. Depending on the situations your children are experiencing, no matter how old they become (even into adulthood), they may require a parent or adult to support them via co-regulation.
As our children grow and become more independent, they may demonstrate increased abilities for independently managing their emotional regulation. Depending on the situations your children are experiencing, no matter how old they become (even into adulthood), they may require a parent or adult to support them via co-regulation.
Developmentally, what we might expect:
Developmentally, what we might expect:
Infants:
Infants:
Shifting attention when overwhelmed
Self-soothing by sucking fingers/soother
Fully dependent on adults
Toddlers:
Toddlers:
Beginning to label feelings
Turning to adults for help with strong feelings
Preschool-aged children:
Preschool-aged children:
Recognizing a growing array of feelings in self and others
Processing more than one emotion at a time can be difficult
With adult support, using strategies like deep breaths
Emergent perspective-taking and early empathy
Co-regulation vs self-regulation continues to be the expectation
To learn more on development for ages 2-5, click here
School aged children:
School aged children:
Ability to recognize the emotions of others and themselves
Perspective taking and empathy
When emotionally charged, they may struggle with appropriate management of emotions
Co-regulation vs self-regulation continues to be the expectation.
To learn more on development for ages 6-10, click here
Additional Resources
Additional Resources
The Way I Feel Parent Handout 2019-20.pdfPrintable Handout
Return to these pages
Return to these pages
Sensory systems for regulation
Sensory systems for regulation
Activating or calming the sensory systems of our body can help reestablish arousal states while promoting health and emotional well being.
The Zones of Regulation
by Leah KypersThe Zones of Regulation
The Zones of Regulation is a curriculum used to teach students strategies for emotional and sensory self-management.
Using visuals to support regulation
Using visuals to support regulation
Using visuals is a great way to support regulation, as visuals help increase predictability, as well as understanding and organization of information.
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