I cheated on my husband how do I fix it - I cheated on my husband and never told him.
Walking down the isle with the love of your life, you meant it when you promised to love one another, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live. No matter how many times you say you are sorry, it seems as though you will never gain the respect, trust and fidelity that you once had in your marriage. Those words are just not enough to get your husband back.
By now, you have already berated yourself. Your emotions should be sorted out first, by asking yourself some serious questions. Discover why you cheated on your spouse and whether you still love them. Consider whether you think they should remain married to you and ways in which you can improve the marriage.
Once you have sorted all of this out in your mind, you should sit down with your partner and discuss your conclusions with them. Choose the right time to do so. Do not call him at work, or the moment he gets home from work. Ask him when would be a good time and understand that he may not be ecstatic at the prospect of talking to you about it. If need be, you will have to rearrange your schedule to suit him and set your children up with a babysitter. Since you cheated, you will be the one who reaches out and show you are serious about repairing the damage. Do not expect that he will beg you to reach out, as he is the one who was hurt.
Reinforce the fact that you want to work through this situation by telling him why you still love him. Tell him why you would like to stay married to him. Children often provide a link between a man and woman, but staying together just for the sake of your children, can cause more resentment. Children are often more happy with one happy parent than with two unhappy parents. Remind him of other difficult times which you have been through and of the happier, special times the two of you shared.
He is bound to be defensive when you suggest ways in which the fidelity, respect and trust can be returned to the marriage. He probably feels betrayed and hurt and will blame you. Just stay calm, loving and patient.
Take heart knowing that the process of saving your marriage may take time and that you may well get your husband back. Many marriages are saved after one or both partners cheated. Many marriages turned out better than before.
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With divorce rates in the United States at an all-time high, knowing the best way to save a marriage is difficult as each and every marriage is different. There are books, classes, support groups, marriage counselors, and even reality television shows that are aimed at helping families stay together.
Most people will agree that the most difficult and hardest divorces are those in which children are involved. Divorce increases the numbers of single parent families and, as it is more difficult to support children when incomes are divided, the numbers of children living in or near poverty is on the rise also. This doesn't even begin to talk about the social and emotional problems that children are faced with as a result of divorcing parents. Children are also the number one reason that couples ask "Please, help save my marriage".
Various authors have tackled the 'Help save my marriage.' pleas that they have received from their followers. Phil McGraw, James Dobson, and Laura Schlessinger are just a few of the many who have written books and made shows that some people will attest have saved their marriages.
One of the most popular reason for divorce is that couple believe they have 'fallen out of love'. The problem with this reason for divorcing is that love isn't something that can be fallen out of with no hope of return. Love is an action verb that can be defined as caring about someone else's needs more than your own. It may take time, but one has to realize that no matter how angry he or she is about current circumstances, someone showing love is more likely to have love returned.
Those couples who are on the verge of divorce should pause to think that the problem in the relationship is not always with the other person. Coples might be disappointed for not having their requirements fulfilled or have not spoken about it to their spouse. If a person needs anything from the marriage, communication regarding the need should be made clearly and without being angry.
Those attempting to "help save my marriage" need to remember that trying to help save marriage is very hard work. It takes a lot of effort and time and results are not immediate. Couples who are willing to try can do it, however. If two people really desire to stay in the marriage and will do what is necessary to heal their union, the marriage can be saved. It often becomes even stronger than ever and the partners are much happier.
Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.
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Why get married at all when so many are just living together? The act of marriage is based on mutual respect for one another and the statement that you have chosen each other for the rest of your lives, not just while it is convenient. Society might say marriage is an outdated, archaic practice that is not any longer necessary, but I beg to differ. The institution of marriage is just as vital today as it was a thousand years ago. I will explain my stance and you can see if you agree.
Love
"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds."(Nickolas Sparks, the Notebook) This definition is part of the love between a man and a woman who have chosen to marry and stay together for the rest of their lives. Marital love involves so much more. Love is a chemical, physical reaction as well as a psychological reaction to someone who has come into your life that you want to be a part of your life always.
Honor
Honor refers to the highest principles of moral standards with absolutely no fraud or lying. Honor is doing what is right. Honor in marriage is vital to the survival of the marriage. By placing immeasurable value on the life of our spouse, we honor them. They come before us always in a healthy marriage because we have decided to put our mate in the position that makes them the most valuable person on earth to ourselves. We have decided that our spouse's needs will be met before our needs. Honor is what drives married couples to take the essential steps toward marital satisfaction. If we do not have honor, then we cannot have a satisfying marriage.
Cherish
To cherish one another is giving affection, shelter and care to each other. You sustain and nourish this relationship because you want to help it grow. Most individuals believe that their spouse is the one person on earth that is their soul mate and they value this relationship enough to make sure that nothing happens to it.
The Covenant
The covenant is the agreement that supplies the promises and commitments to the marriage bond. The spiritual covenant that is binding and sacred is spoke of in the Bible. For those who do not adhere to the Bible, a covenant is the legal binding of a union. For Christian believers, married individuals made commitments to the marriage and are bound by God to live by them. Even when things do not go well for a married couple, the covenant continues to bind them.
In a final analysis; marriage, love, honor, cherishing and abiding by the covenant of marriage is just as relevant to our society today as it was a thousand years ago. Divorce was not meant to be, but because it is the easy way out rather than sticking with a relationship that needs serious work, people opt for divorce and violate the covenant of marriage.
50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage. There are powerful techniques that will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here
Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your marriage can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage - Learn More Here
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Further Reading:
What To Say When Your Wife Is Mad At You
My Wife Doesn’t Want to Have Sex Anymore
I Lost My Job and My Wife Hates Me
I Love My Husband but I Can’t Stand Him