Conflict Resolution

The domestic harmonizer website defines conflict as an unmet need, and it happened when people feel their needs are not met. Conflict occurs regularly in our daily lives, and it can happen in any situation where people interact. There are many causes for conflict, which will be explored in the next unit. However, it is important to understand that conflict itself is neither “good” nor “bad” and it all boils down to how that conflict is handled (Kian & Devoogd, 2022).

The following can be sources of conflict:

  • History

  • Limited resources

  • Culture and values

  • Different understanding

  • Structure

What is conflict, (Litmos Heroes, 2014)

Types of conflict:

Conflicts can happen on many different levels – from an unmet need inside a single person to several unmet needs between and among two or more people. Below is an explanation:

1- Intra-personal Conflict: this is a type of struggle or tension that occurs within a person.

2- Interpersonal Conflict: this type of conflict happens between two individuals.

3- Intra-group Conflict: this type of conflict happens within a specific group, whether it is a sports group, the eighth-grade class, or a political or religious group.

4- Inter-group Conflict: this type of conflict happens between or among large social, cultural, or other organized groups.

Types of Conflict, (Initiative, 2019a)

Some conflicts escalate from a small argument to a full-blown physical fight, while others are quickly resolved after the initial argument, and therefore, the relationships and the different levels of intensity that each carries. are not too negatively impacted. It is important to understand the Stages of Conflict and the different levels of intensity that each carries (Kian & Devoogd, 2022).

Types of Conflict, (Initiative, 2019a)

Conflict Stages

1- Disagreement

2- Confrontations or incidents

3- Breakdown of the relationship

4- Breakdown of the trust

5- Crisis


Conflict Stages, (Kian & Devoogd, 2022)

Not all conflict is destructive but we can think that always in each conflict there can be an opportunity as well. Like Albert Einstein said that “in the middle of difficulty lies opportunity”. Therefore, Students have to think about the three important aspects of every conflict situation in order to positively solve them.

1- Understanding the people

2- Their perception: “we do not see things the way they are, we see things as we are ” (ANAIS NIN)

3- Their underlying need

Underlying Needs Maslow reimagined

At the heart of every conflict, one or more needs are not met. These needs fall into nine categories.

Resources

Freedom

Purpose

Safety

Love

Respect

Community

Rest

creation


Maslow’s underlying needs, (Kian & Devoogd, 2022)

Perception, communication and underlying needs, (Initiative, 2019b)

Types of conflict styles-Analyze your conflict styles, (Initiative, 2019c)

Conflict Management Style

Every individual may respond differently to a conflict based on their behavior and attitude. Overall, there are five major conflict management styles. Knowing when and how to use each style can help control conflict and lead to improved schools, workplaces, and communities, resulting in a better bottom line.

1- Collaborating:

  • A combination of being assertive and cooperative.

  • Those who collaborate attempt to work with others to identify a solution that fully satisfies everyone’s concerns.

  • This style is the opposite of avoiding.

  • Collaborating works best when the long-term relationship and outcome are important.

2- Competing:

  • Competing style is about being uncooperative and willing to pursue one’s own concerns at another person’s expense.

  • Using this style works when we do not care about the relationship and the outcome is important for us.

3- Avoiding:

  • Those who avoid conflict tend to be unassertive and uncooperative, while diplomatically sidestepping an issue or simply withdrawing from a threatening situation.

  • Use this when it is safer to postpone dealing with the situation, or you don’t have as great concern about the outcome

  • Using avoiding style can be an appropriate approach when we have a conflict with a co-worker about some ethics of them on the job.

4- Accommodating:

  • This is the opposite of the competition style.

  • When accommodating to satisfy the others, then there is an element of self-sacrifice.

  • Although it may seem generous, it could misuse the weak and cause resentment.

  • Using this style can be helpful when preserving the relationship is more important than the outcome.

5- Compromising:

  • The objective of this style is to find an expedient to be acceptable for both parties.

  • It keeps some assertiveness and cooperativeness.

  • This style is best used to utilize the time, make a decision, and move forward to the essential things.

Typically, collaboration is the best way to deal with a conflict, but it completely depends on the type of conflict. In general, collaboration helps to be in a win-win situation, meaning that each of the parties gets what they want and have their unmet needs addressed and met.

Conflict style graph, (Kian & Devoogd, 2022)

Mediation and decision trees

According to Whitaker Peace & Development Initiative (2021), mediation is a very commonly used process in the conflict resolution field to resolve a wide range of social, political, and economic issues.

In the United States and Europe, mediation has gained great popularity over the last decade due to its efficiency, relatively low cost, and more satisfactory resolutions.


What is Peer-Mediation?, (R3SOLUTE, 2019)

Mediation at schools, conflict resolution, (ҚР Білім және ғылым министрлігі, 2018)

Mediation is an opportunity for the disputing parties to articulate their conflict and discuss their needs. This process of sharing all sides of a story is rarely explored in other methods of conflict resolution, as it is in mediation. The reason for this is that the mediation process is guided by an expert in the process of mediation – a mediator (Whitaker Peace & Development Initiative, 2021). The mediator’s role is to be impartial.

  • The mediator’s role is not to make a ruling or any decisions.

  • The mediator guides the process of mediation. Then the disputants share their issues/ cases and brainstorm solutions and then finally agree upon those solutions.

Below are all of the hallmarks of mediation:

  • The process is guided by a trained mediator who is impartial and volunteer

  • Confidentiality is key in mediation, meaning that no parties in the

  • mediation, including the mediator, can tell anyone else what happened in the mediation,

  • It is usually quick and inexpensive.

  • It can help to repair and maintain relationships,

  • It can help people to get closure because it allows people to share their perspectives and contribute to the solution.

Benefits of Peer Mediation

In peer mediation, the process is guided by two trained mediators who are familiar with the process of mediation. The goal is to create a win-win situation (Whitaker Peace & Development Initiative, 2021).

Peer mediation has been proven to:

  • Empower students to resolve their own conflicts and repair relationships

  • Reduce school fights, suspensions, and expulsions

  • Reduce staff time spent on discipline issues

  • Diversity is significant in all mediation situations.

  • Peer mediators must be poised, confident, demonstrate empathy and truly care about solving conflicts on campus.

  • Students chosen to resolve conflicts through peer mediation must possess the qualities of a mediator, without exception.

Peer Mediation Guideline

Whitaker Peace & Development Initiative (2021) articulated a six steps guideline for the mediator to raise their capacity for a fair mediation and consequently address the schools’ issues easily.

1- Introduction

Two peer mediators and disputers introduce themselves. The process is also explained to the disputants. The mediators then state the ground rules for mediation which include:

  • No interruptions

  • Respect all parties at all times

  • No eye rolling

  • No rude statements

  • Assurance that the parties must keep the process confidential

2- Gather information

  • The mediators then invite each disputant to tell his/her side of what happened. The mediators should valuate and inquire who will go first, and assure that another disputant does agree.

  • While the disputants share their side of what happened and how the conflict made them feel, the mediators should take notes, and also actively listen.

  • The mediators ask open-ended questions to continue gathering information on key points. The mediators also summarize and restate each disputant’s side of the story to ensure that they understood the main points.

  • Before going on to the next step in the mediation, the mediators can ask, “Is there anything else that we need to know?”

3- Identify underlying needs

  • The mediators restate each disputant’s account of what happened with a focus on the unmet needs of the parties

  • The mediators must focus on the issues and needs that are important to both parties

  • The mediators should ask the disputants if they missed anything before, they go on to the next step

4- Brainstorm solutions

  • The mediators invite the disputants to find solutions to the unmet needs

  • As the disputants brainstorm their own solutions, it is important for the mediators to not strike down any suggestions – instead it is important to encourage all suggestions by the disputants, no matter how ridiculous they may seem initially

  • One key tip is to focus on the solutions for one issue – or unmet need – at a time

5- Evaluate the solutions

  • The mediators should ask the disputants to talk about how all possible solutions will affect the disputants’ relationship with one another.

  • The mediators should ask the disputants to talk about which solutions they are willing to agree on, and which ones they would not agree on.

  • The disputants should then decide together which solution is the best.

  • If the disputants are satisfied with the solution, then the mediators move on to the final step.

6- Closing

  • The mediators ask the disputants if any issues have been missed, and if so, they need to be explored. Mediators need to remind the disputants of the confidentiality of their privacy and information.

  • The mediators write an agreement that outlines the solution that the disputants discussed and ask the disputants to read it and sign it

  • The mediators should congratulate the disputants for making a good effort and resolving their issue peacefully



Power of Emotion and Words

Emotions affect the human body in many ways. Emotions influence how we think, feel and behave. Emotions are complicated. We can have several emotions at the same time. Our excitement for something can change to nervousness and worry. This can be caused or impacted by a thought, a situation, or an action (Whitaker Peace & Development Initiative, 2021).