Counsellor's Corner

START OF SOMETHING NEW

-a reflection from atomic habits and tiny habits-

Change is difficult, and sometimes it can be uncomfortable. That is why it is difficult for us to start new habits. However, the beginning of the academic year is a good time for us, as students, faculty members, and the Global Jaya community, to consider starting something new. Timing is an important thing when we want to start something, so let us use this good timing to form a new habit, start a new project, or create something that has a positive impact on our surroundings.

The problem that we usually experience is that it is easier for us to stick to our bad habits than to create a good one. Often, we make commitments just to accept the reality that in the end, we fail to create our new habit. We found out that a year later, we just do the same thing over and over again instead of doing something better for our life. We lose our good intentions and motivation after attempting the new habit for several days. It seems fun at the beginning, but it is not easy to maintain. 

There are two different ways of changing our habits. The first one is changing our habits based on results, and the second one is changing our habits based on our identity. 

Attempting to build a new habit based on the intended results 

The motivation behind this way of forming a new habit is driven by the results that we hope we will see. 

Examples of the kinds of results that can be connected to changes in habits might be: 

1. Achieve a good score

2. Lose weight

3. Increase sales

4. Decrease sugar intake

5. Winning a championship

We are very familiar with attempting to change habits based on what we hope will be the end result. Most of the goals or resolutions we set at the beginning of the year are related to this level of change. We focus on something that we want to get, something that we try to achieve: the result. Some of us can make sustainable changes with this kind of habit. 

If there is someone who tries to decrease their sugar consumption and we offer him a cup of sugary drink, he will say, “No thank you. I’m trying to decrease my sugar intake”. From his sentence, we know that he is focusing on the end goal in order to change his behaviour.  However, maybe deep inside his heart, he still believes that he has a sweet tooth.

Changing habits based on identity 

The second way to change our habits is by changing our beliefs about ourselves. Rather than changing our habits by focusing on what we would like to achieve, with this approach we focus on what we want to become in order to change our habits. 

Returning to our first example about someone who wants to decrease his sugar intake, he will turn down the offer of a sugary drink by saying “No, I’m not a sweet tooth.” This seems a very small difference, but the difference is significant because it is related to a change in the identity. ‘I’m not a sweet tooth’ is indicative of somebody who consumes sugary drinks/food anymore. He is not identifying himself as a sweet-tooth.

We rarely think about the identity change when we want to form a new habit. We are often driven by what we want to achieve (the goal) and not what kind of person we want to be. When we go deeper behind every behavior there is a belief system that becomes our identity. If our behaviors is not consistent with our beliefs, the change in behavior will be difficult to sustain. Accordingly, to change our habits we need to also makes changes to our beliefs and our identity. There are two simple steps that we can take in order to begin to change our habits in this way:

1. Choose the kind of person that you want to be

2. Take a baby step towards forming the desired habit

Using these two steps, here are some realistic examples that cover the change of habits that stem from a change in identity:  

I want to be a healthier person

Identity: Become a person who eats more fruit and vegetables

Small wins: add a portion of vegetables and fruit on every meal

I want to be a better reader

Identity: Become a person who read consistently every day

Small wins: read 2 pages every day

I want to be a good speaker

Identity: Become a person who presents ideas consistently

Small wins: share ideas in every class/lesson

I want to be a good friend

Identity: Become an active listener

Small wins: paraphrase whenever someone shares their stories

BABY STEPS TOWARDS CHANGING OUR HABITS

The famous quote from Lao Tzu said “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step”. It is just the same with our habits, to be able to create a long-lasting habit, we need to start small. A big change could be overwhelming and not comfortable for us. The most important thing is to make a consistent move to build our habits day by day. The easier the behavior changes, the better, because it is more likely for the behavior to turn into a habit.

Here are examples of baby steps to shape habits:

1. Decide the identity that we want

I want to be a better reader

Identity: Become a person who read consistently every day

Break it down into baby steps: Read 2 pages every day

2. Make prompt for a habit

Find a behavior it should come after. For example, if you’re trying to read more, you might decide on a reliable Action Prompt (Anchor). Once you have identified a habit you want, you can create what a Tiny Habit Recipe:

After I (ANCHOR), I will (NEW HABIT).

For example:
After I wear my pajamas, I will read 2 pages of the book.

3. Celebration
   Celebration is an essential part of making a lasting change. Every time we successfully perform our new habit, we should celebrate. This is essential because it creates good feelings for us, which wires the new habit to our brain. When we remember what behavior makes us feel good we are more likely to do it again. The celebration could be as simple as saying “Good job or Awesome” in our mind.

So, what habits have you decided to create in this new academic year? Remember that your habit is your identity. Let us become a better version of ourselves this year.

Reference

James Clear (2020) Identity-based habits: How to actually stick to your goals this year, James Clear. Available at: https://jamesclear.com/identity-based-habits (Accessed: 28 August 2023). 

Clear, J. (2022) Atomic habits: Tiny changes, remarkable results: An easy and proven way to build good habits and break bad ones. London: Cornerstone press. 

Fogg, B.J. (2020) Tiny Habits: Why starting small makes Lasting Change Easy. London: Virgin Books.