Is Hershey's Truly Terrible?
Kim Leah Moriones
April 20, 2023
In a surprising turn of events, I find myself in the minority against several of the other journalists in the Pioneer Post, all boiling down to one topic: the enjoyment of chocolate.
Now you must be thinking, Why are they talking about something so minute? It’s not anything newsworthy, and it certainly isn’t one that has any merit for a debate. People simply have different taste buds and enjoy different things.
And you’d be right, but for the sake of this debate, we’ll simply be considering extreme sides of loving or hating the bliss that is chocolate.
We spoke specifically about Hershey’s chocolates, about the history of its vomit-like taste due to soured milk being sent from farm to factory. Sorry to ruin your appetite, but it also ruined mine, but I hope it doesn’t completely destroy your appetite for capitalism.
First we’ll discuss the taste of vomit. Because if we’re going to fight fire with fire, we’re all going to suffer. One: why would you know what vomit tastes like, and why specifically Hershey’s vomit? Chemicals are part of every consumable food we eat, and if we remember what vomit is — a culmination of the food we last ate along with several other acidic chemicals that break down food within our stomach — then can’t we assume that all foods taste like vomit?
Secondly, we have to consider the circumstances in which Hershey’s chocolate was produced and sold. All foods have distinctive tastes because of the chemistry that makes up the food itself. It’s not impossible to believe that humans also like consistency and familiarity. Combined, this unfamiliarity because of the ingredient change after such a long period of time is bound to make a ruckus from the massive amount of consumers, threatening the security of the company as a whole. So of course capitalism wins and we still have the same ingredients that were used back then in today’s batches.
Personally speaking, Hershey’s chocolate hate is also very confusing. The Hershey’s brand covers several branches of smaller chocolate brands, including 3 Musketeers and Milky Ways, and yet there’s such stigma against the original? Have you considered that there’s a slight possibility that they’re using butyric acid in those chocolates too? Not only that, Hershey’s chocolates still continue to be the staple of holiday chocolates, from Hershey’s Kisses to their massive 5-lb Hershey’s bar.
I completely understand that people may be picky eaters or possibly allergic to chocolate (I’m sorry). But simply hating a piece of chocolate because of how it’s made may be taking it a bit too far. I’d even go as far as to call you insane.
Sergio Lozano
April 20th, 2023
A recent conversation with peers in the Journalism Club revealed something shocking to me, people actually like Hershey’s chocolate. A concept so foreign to me that I questioned what I just had heard. As throughout most of my life, I had disliked the particular chocolate brand. To be clear: I do not hate EVERY chocolate, I’m just talking about Herhsey’s. I really like other chocolate bars such as 100 Grand, Twix, Snickers, and Milky Way.
My biggest issue with Hershey’s is that it just tastes like vomit. That's not just my opinion either, many people have said that it just tastes like vomit. This is actually rooted in the chocolate itself. Hershey’s for years have been essentially purposefully making the milk that they use for chocolate go sour, making amounts of butyric acids appear and making the chocolate-making process cheaper for the company, not much for the taste. Butyric acid, for those who don’t know, is also found in human vomit. It is an actual fact that Herhsey’s tastes like vomit. AND PEOPLE ACTUALLY LIKE THAT. As a certified normal human being myself (or at least I think I am), I am not too fond of vomit (I know what a hot take), and I simply wish to not taste it in my chocolate.
I understand that many people like Hershey’s, and I do see the appeal. The way it’s shaped means that you can break a big bar into pieces to share with friends, or use it in s’mores. But, the taste will always remain the same. Any flavor, eaten any way, will simply result in the taste of vomit again and again. I’ve played Far Cry 3, where I learned that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting things to change, not too different from finding a way to make Hershey’s taste good. So to conclude my argument, I am saying that people who like Hershey’s are insane. Thank you.